


Shooting Star in a Normal Sky

by padaleckifantrash, wincestismyguiltypleasure1967



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Burning, Consenual non-con, Cutting, M/M, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-09
Updated: 2016-06-29
Packaged: 2018-06-07 10:45:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 45,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6800563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/padaleckifantrash/pseuds/padaleckifantrash, https://archiveofourown.org/users/wincestismyguiltypleasure1967/pseuds/wincestismyguiltypleasure1967
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared Padalecki is a part-time barista, part-time writer, and part-time student. His days are relatively mundane... Until famous actor Jensen Ackles walks into the quaint coffee shop where Jared works.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I will be updating this every Monday and Thursday. Unfortunately, the progress of making the story is slowing down due to personal issues with my partner and I, so there will be a time where updates with be further in between, so I apologize ahead of time. 
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> **there is a brief albeist (I dunno if that's how you spell it) slur in this chapter.

"That's a wrap!"

Jensen relaxed and nodded to his co-star.

"Good job today, Jake. I'll see you tomorrow," he said and made his leave known to the cast and crew before escaping to his trailer. Day 17 of filming and his mind was in a fog. He needed a nice cup of coffee that wasn't watered down by the interns. 

He put on sunglasses and a hat in hopes that it wouldn't draw too much attention to himself; he couldn't wear a jacket because the Texas sun was so damn hot. When he deemed himself acceptable, he slipped out of his trailer and started walking to put distance between himself and where he was filming. He avoided large coffee shop chains, instead walking into a small, local place. It was almost empty save for the one barista and two customers on opposite sides of the shop.

Perfect.

It was a quaint little place. The walls were a beige with white tile on the floors. It wasn't big at all; only had three tables and in the front was a small countertop with a cash register on top and one glass display on the right, glass separating the coffee machines from the customers on the other side. There seemed to be a small kitchen in back, big enough to make the pastries that graced the display. Jensen loved it.

\---------

Jared started his day like normal. Get up, shower, breakfast, brush teeth, get dressed, leave. It was a mundane ritual he had been going through for the two years he had lived on his own. He was only 20 and the small coffee shop he worked at gave him only enough to pay his rent and not starve. His parents were nice enough to pay for his online schooling--he needed as many hours as he could get at work and taking online classes was easier. Jared was an aspiring author, taking as many English related courses as his parents could pay for.

He thought that day would be the same as any other day. Work, homework, work on his book, and sleep for the five hours he could get. It all changed from that day forward when he heard the tiny little bell above the door chime.

He turned around from where he was wiping down the counter and gave his best customer service smile. 

"Hi there! What can I get for you today?" he asked once the male appeared at the counter.

Jensen held back the sigh of relief when the boy didn't seem to recognize him. He looked up at the small menu and decided to keep it simple. 

"I'll have a large iced coffee with three creams and four sugars. Also..." He looked at the display of desserts that were apparently made that day. "What do you suggest from here--" he looked at the barista's name tag. "--Jared?"

Jared smiled and nodded, pushing the correct amount for the coffee on the cash register. Hearing his name slip out of this man's throat gave him the chills; he had such a gravelly but smooth voice all at once. 

"The apple pie is pretty popular, but anything from here is pretty good. Everything is made fresh," he said, fingers hovering over the numbers. Something about the stranger seemed familiar but he couldn't quite place his finger on it.

Jensen's mouth watered at the mention of a freshly made apple pie. 

"I'll have a slice of that then," he decided and pulled a $20 bill out of his wallet and handed it over to Jared.

Jared grinned and put the total in for the coffee and pie. 

"Total is $5.57, change back is $14.43. Can I get a name, please?" Jared asked after handing back the change, tip jar barren except for a dollar and a quarter from one of the regulars. He was hoping to get more in tips so he could start saving up to pay his parents back. And he didn't really need a name--the shop was nearly empty--but he wanted to know who the stranger was. 

He went behind the counter to grab the pie and put the slice into a little box, sliding that into a paper bag with a fork and napkins before handing it to the man and getting a sharpie and a cup.

Jensen looked down at the tip jar and put all of his change in it; Jared looked like he needed it more anyway. 

"The name's Jensen. No need to put the pie in a bag. I'll sit and eat it in here. It's nice and quiet." He decided it was safe because Jared didn't seem to recognize him. At that moment, he took off his sunglasses and hat to reveal his identity as _the_ Jensen Ackles.

Jared's hand froze for a second before writing the name on his cup. What a coincidence, his favorite actor was named Jensen. 

"Alright, and thank you for the tip," Jared said and when he looked back up, he almost fainted.

Jensen Ackles.

Fucking _superstar_ Jensen Ackles was in the coffee shop. The normal coffee shop in his normal life. He was frozen but had to snap out of it. 

_I should pretend like I still don't know him. Maybe he'll be more willing to come back_ , Jared thought. 

He cleared his throat and smiled, taking the pie out of the bag and handing it to him without it, still with fork and napkins, however. 

"I'll get your coffee to you in just a second," he said, high fiving himself on the inside for not being as shy and stuttery as he thought he would be. He made the coffee exactly the way Jensen ordered and came back to the front of the counter, putting it down with a shaky hand. 

"Here y'go, J-Jensen! One large coffee with three creams and four sugars," he chirped and grunted when he realized his shy stutter crept in. Jensen Ackles was in front of him; he couldn't act like a what his friends called a "fangirl". "I hope you like it," he said honestly, biting at his already bitten-up lip. Stress was a bitch and Jared's lower lip took the brunt of it.

Jensen brushed off Jared's stutter as him being flustered; most people got flustered around him, even if they didn't know he was famous. Jensen wasn't stupid, he knew the affect his looks had on people. 

"Thanks, Jared." He picked up his coffee and took a sip, nodding in approval when the hot liquid hit his tongue. "It's great. Hopefully the pie is even better." He shot the barista a wink and headed off to the back of the shop so he could enjoy his coffee and pastry in peace. Jensen ate a forkful of pie after he sat down and closed his eyes in appreciation. The pie was so damn good that he was tempted to ask if they made whole pies for sale. He was definitely returning the next day. 

Jared most definitely did not squeak like a little girl when Jensen winked at him. Nope. And he definitely did not fantasize about Jensen coming back every day and then asking him on a date then taking him back to his place, Jensen's hands all over his body, lips wrapped around his co--

The clearing of a throat made Jared swivel around almost too quickly, a slight dizziness fogging his head. His cheeks were ridiculously pink and his apron and the height of the counter hid the slight bulge in his pants.

"What can I get for you?" he asked the customer, eyes continually flicking back and forth between him and Jensen.

Jensen sipped his coffee and looked up at Jared when he heard him talking to a customer. He could see the little side glances he was receiving and he hid his smirk behind his coffee cup. It was almost amusing to watch Jared.

The younger male made the drink the person ordered quickly, mind half on the dark chocolate and caramel frappuccino with only a little bit of whipped cream and no caramel drizzle, and half on Jensen Ackles sitting in the coffee shop. 

"Enjoy," Jared said with a smile and handed the stranger the cup of coffee.

"What is this?" the person asked, eyes slits towards him.

"It's the dark chocolate and caramel frappuccino," he simply back, brows furrowing.

"No, retard, this!" the customer snapped and shoved the drink at Jared. "I didn't want the caramel drizzle, you deaf imbecile. Give me another one and I want my money back."

Jared was on the verge of tears. Not once in his time working there was he berated so openly by a customer. He sniffled and put the drink to the side and began the new one, fighting the tears wanting to fall.

Jensen shot up at the shouting, his chair scraping against the floor from the force. He stormed over to the front where some customer was yelling at the poor kid. He looked like he was about to burst into tears. 

Jensen slid into the space between the counter and the customer. 

"It was an honest mistake. There's no reason for you to be screaming at the guy. You need to calm down and apologize or I'll have to ask you to leave." Jensen didn't know why, but he was glaring the man down like he had a personal vendetta against him. Jensen stood at least a foot taller than the customer and didn't hesitate using his stature to intimidate the man.

Jared whipped his head around at the commotion and watched as Jensen came to his aid. Clearly, the man recognized him and nodded, muttering a quick apology before scurrying off and out of the store. The two regulars in the shop didn't say anything but nodded towards the direction of Jensen in thanks. Thankfully, the regulars either didn't know who he was or they just didn't care. Jared threw out the half made coffee and sighed, running a nervous hand through his hair before taking the fully made drink and putting it in the fridge in back. No use in wasting it; he basically got free coffee.

"Thank you," he said quietly after walking up to the front of the counter. He wiped at his wet eyes and bit at his lip. "If... If you come here again, whatever you want is definitely on me," he laughed softly, hazel eyes darting up to meet the celebrities. 

_God, they're even greener in person_ , Jared thought dreamily.

Jensen watched the man walk out and turned to Jared once he heard the boy thank him. 

He frowned at the tears in the barista's hazel eyes. Sure, they made Jared's eyes look glassy and so deep that Jensen never wanted to look away, but the way the tears came to his eyes angered Jensen. 

"You're welcome. People don't understand that others make mistakes sometimes." He gave Jared a soft smile. "You can bet I'll be coming back. That pie is even better than you said. M'gonna have to try and squeeze the recipe out of you," he joked with a smirk.

Jared chuckled softly and sniffled again, eyes averted down slightly out of shyness. 

"I mean, I could just make you a full pie," he flirted lamely, peeking up at the man through his shaggy bangs. "I'll definitely make sure to keep a piece at all times for you," he added, smiling more openly. "Thank you, again, really."

Jensen grinned and leaned over the counter to get closer to the man. 

"So _you're_ the one who makes the pie? I might have to take you up on that offer." He _might_ have been flirting with the other. It was fun and a blush always looked cute whenever Jensen caused it. 

It also helped that Jared was _very_ easy on the eyes.

Jared's cheeks became a baby soft pink and he bit at his lip again, nibbling the plush skin. 

"When do you plan on comin' back tomorrow? Same time?" he asked, trying not to sound too hopeful, drumming his fingers anxiously on the counter top. He felt even more attracted to Jensen in person than he did just in pictures. It was almost unreal. Jared had the urge to pinch himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming.

Jensen thought about his schedule and pursed his lips. 

"Not sure. Tell you what, why don't you tell me when you get out of work and I'll be here an hour before? We can chat a little more." He flashed a toothy grin to the floppy haired man.

Jared's heart sped up and he felt his mouth dry, cheeks burning red.

"U-Uh, today I get off at s-six and--" Jesus, when did it get so hot in there? "--tomorrow I get off at seven."

Jared internally stabbed himself at how shy he was being in front of his favorite celebrity. Jensen _wanted_ to come back to talk to Jared. It was a dream come true.

Jensen nodded and pulled back to stand up straight.

"I'll be here in time for you to get off," the actor said and walked back to his table, collecting his trash and belongings. He looked up to see Jared's reaction. He knew that his words could be taken very provocatively and he wanted to see if Jared would get any redder.

Jared's breath hitched and he felt his entire face go red from embarassment. He wasn't oblivious to flirting but... Why was Jensen flirting with him of all people?

"O-Okay, Jensen. I'll see you then," he said, voice wavering. This was straight out of fan-fiction he definitely didn't read about Jensen constantly. He squirmed, half hard dick begging to be released, but he just took a rag and started wiping down the counter once more. Jensen kept his smirk to himself and threw away his trash.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Jared." He put his sunglasses and hat back on, not forgetting that he had an identity to keep secret.

He looked once more at Jared and gave a small wave as he left the coffee shop. He was met with the warm air that made him long for another cup of iced coffee and the shop's cozy atmosphere. He shook it off and started for his hotel.


	2. Chapter 2

Jared woke up from some scandalous dreams of him and Jensen but started his day like normal. Surprisingly, the day went by fast and Jared soon found himself on his coveted lunch break, picking at one of the blueberry muffins he had made for himself. He was scrolling through his phone and stopped on an E! News Facebook post.

_"Wherever Jensen goes, women always follow!"_

The picture was of Jensen and his costar, with his arm wrapped around her waist, and the boy's mood immediately deflated. Of course. He was obviously not gay, how could Jared have been so stupid as to think he was flirting? He put down his phone, unwilling to read the rest of the article.

Suddenly, he wasn't hungry anymore, either. He put the muffin away in the fridge in back and sadly sipped on his coffee until it was time for his break to be over. He doubted Jensen would return and went on with his day, that fake smile plastered on his bitten lips the entire time.

\---------

Jensen woke up with a smile that strangely enough wasn't because he was excited to film. Of course he loved his job and loved the people, but he found himself excited to eat another slice of that sweet apple pie. 

The thought of making Jared blush again was definitely a bonus, too. The man was cute and Jensen wouldn't mind making a stop at Jared's place some night.

The more he thought about Jared, the more he wanted to see him again. It was refreshing that the man didn't know him. A little insulting because Jensen thought he was an amazing actor, but it was refreshing nonetheless. He could actually have a decent conversation with someone without the topic moving back to his career. 

Yeah, he was definitely excited to see Jared again.

\---------

Every time the director called for a break, Jensen's eyes flicked to the clock in anticipation. It was almost time for filming to end and then he could go to the coffee shop that was preoccupying his mind the entire day. 

"Jen, where's the fire? Got a hot date we don't know about?" Jensen turned to Richard, the cast clown that couldn't go five minutes without pranking or teasing someone. It wasn't overly obnoxious, but sometimes he went a little too far.

Jensen could _not_ let Richard know about Jared. If Richard knew...

Everyone would know.

And Jensen just couldn't afford that.

So the actor just shrugged and rubbed his neck. 

"I didn't get too much sleep last night. Was practicing my lines and I fell asleep on a chair. Was not comfortable at all," he lied smoothly. That was the beauty about being an actor. 

If someone was a good actor, they were an even better liar. 

Richard grimaced but shrugged. 

"That blows, it really does. Would that mean I have no chance of convincing you to join me and some of the others for a tour of the town? We can get drunk in a limo like teens at the prom!" Richard looked absolutely giddy and for a second Jensen actually considered it.

But then he remembered Jared and frowned. He promised the man he would come back the next day. It wasn't like he could just skip out on him. 

"I'd love to, but I can't. I'm going to get some coffee and work on some exercises. Thanks, though." 

Before Richard could respond, the director called for the last roll of the day and Jensen watched as Richard was pulled away to do his scene. 

Then a thought came to Jensen. He was done filming for the day. He could go see Jared right then. Sure, it would be an hour before he was expected, but fuck it. 

He jogged to his trailer and got his glasses and hat once again. Just because the city wasn't exactly the most populated place in the area, didn't mean Jensen could risk going out without something hiding his face. 

_Pie, here I come. Jared, too. But mostly pie_ , he thought as he started for the coffee shop.

\------

Jared was making a regular coffee for someone when the bell chimed again. He looked up from what he was doing and almost let the boiling coffee overflow into his hand. He put the lid on and gave it to James or John or whatever, heart racing once again. 

"Oh, h-hi, Jensen," Jared mumbled, taking a clean rag to wipe down the messy counter. He kept his eyes on everything but the God of a man in front of him. Jealousy and disappointment ran through his veins and he sighed.

Jensen walked up to the counter once Jared was done with the customer in front of him.

"What's wrong? You're not as smiley today," the celebrity said, brows softly pulled together. He pulled out a $20 bill and handed it over to Jared. "I'll have the same thing as yesterday, please." He watched the man's facial features and body language, seeing how upset he was. 

Jensen really didn't like it.

Jared nodded and gave him back the right amount of change and served him the pie without the bag, this time. 

"Just tired," the younger male murmured and made the coffee quickly, handing it to the man as well. He tried cheering up, trying not to drive away the obviously taken and straight man. "How are you?" he asked, smiling softly but still a tad fakely.

Jensen immediately dropped the change into the tip jar just as he did the day before. 

"Come on, Jared, I work with liars all day. If you're going to lie to me, you gotta do better than that. What's got that pretty blush of yours in hiding?" He took a quick survey of the room before taking off his sunglasses. His piercing green eyes were focused solely on Jared as he took a sip from his hot beverage.

Jared blushed again at the comment of his blush being pretty and he laughed shyly. 

"Uh.. I found out the person I have a major crush on isn't single," he admitted. It wasn't a lie at all but he was trying to keep it at as vague as possible. "It's fine, though, that's just life..." he trailed off then he perked up. "I made you something," he said quickly and went back to the kitchen and retrieved a refrigerated apple pie. He brought it back out and put it on the countertop in front of the other.

Jensen just about lit up at the entire pie that Jared made for him. _Made_ for _him_. And he didn't even know who Jensen was. 

"You're amazing, Jared." He frowned when he registered Jared's words. "Taken, huh? I'm sorry. Why don't you come have some pie with me? You can talk to me about it and we can get to know each other better." 

Jensen wasn't heartless; he wasn't going to flirt with the man when he was obviously upset over someone else. The best thing he could think of was sharing some amazing pie and talking about whatever came to mind. It had been a while since he sat down and actually talked to someone without thinking about work.

"Um, sure! That would be good," Jared said and checked the time. It was still early but he had nothing else to do. He washed his hands before leaving from behind the counter, white apron still tied around his muscular body. He sat at the table Jensen went to and pulled at the skin on his lower lip. "I'm not very hungry, though, you can have it all," Jared said quietly, eyeing the pie like it was diamonds, however.

Jensen grinned and sat across from Jared, his back to the wall so he could keep an eye as to who walked in. 

"Jared, what did I tell you about lying?" The man opened the container, smiling gently. "Share with me. We don't even have to worry about cutting it into slices," he offered and handed the fork to the younger man. Jensen would save the single slice he bought for later. He could tell that the man was hungry because he was eyeing the pie like Jensen would eye a juicy steak.

Jared sighed shakily and took the fork to put a small piece in his mouth. Full, pink lips wrapped around the fork and he groaned softly at the taste of his own creation--it could have seemed narcissistic but his appetite had reappeared and the pie was a godsend. 

Jensen eyed Jared's lips as they wrapped around the fork and felt his pants tighten at the cute little groan the man made. He wondered if Jared knew what he was doing to him. He desperately wanted to feel Jared's slick lips wrapped around his cock.

Jared set the fork in the small crevice he created in the pie and swiped his tongue over his lips in thought.

"Well, I'm not lying. Just... Protecting their identity is all," he said, bouncing his leg nervously. "I saw it on Facebook and he... He was huggin' on some girl who he had dated before," Jared admitted, blush still prominent on his tanned cheeks.

When Jensen realized he was staring, he looked up at Jared's eyes. Luckily, the other didn't notice. 

"Huggin' some other girl, huh? He obviously doesn't know what he's missing if he's choosing her over you. Best damn pie I've ever tasted." He brought a forkful up to his lips and ate it similarly to how Jared ate it before, closing his eyes and moaning just like Jared. The only thing that was different was that he did it on purpose. He opened his eyes and gave Jared a small smirk. "And I eat a _lot_ of pie."

Jared gulped, squirming a tad in the chair. His own cock hardened slightly and he rubbed the back of his neck nervously. 

"You only like my company because of the pie," Jared grumbled, laughing despite his sad state before. "Well, I dunno. Him and I are really different. Like... Two separate worlds. He deserves someone in his world," he said quietly before taking the fork and grabbing another piece of pie. It was so easy to open up to Jensen and he hated it but loved it all the same.

Jensen chuckled and shook his head. 

"Believe it or not, I like your company because you're cute and you take the stress off from my job," he said and shrugged. 

Jared blushed profusely, face on fire; he was never called cute so blatantly before and now Jensen Ackles of all people was calling him that? What the hell? It confused Jared, but he accepted the compliment nonetheless.

"As for him, if you think he should have someone else, then leave him be. If you think there's a shot, then try. Do you talk to him often?" Jensen asked, sipping the coffee as he waited for Jared to answer.

"Um... Uh... Um..." Jared had trouble figuring out what to say. If he said he talked to his crush a lot, he'd seem _normal_ for having a crush on the person, but he'd be lying. If he said he didn't talk to his crush a lot, he'd be telling the truth but it would sound weird for liking someone he barely conversed with.

"What do you do for work?" Jared asked, hoping to get off of the subject of his crush. Aka, the man sitting in front of him. Aka, the man who had _asked_ about his crush.

Jensen shrugged off the fact that Jared didn't want to talk about the subject anymore. 

"I'm a lawyer in the next city over. I'm working on a case here so I've been staying in town." Technically, he wasn't lying; the character he was playing was a big shot lawyer. He had all of his character's background memorized and he could answer anything Jared asked that concerned something personal. "What do you do besides work here? Go to school or anything?" the celebrity asked as he licked his lips free of the apple pie filling.

Jared scoffed loudly but covered his mouth. He looked down, lowered his hand, and ripped at his lip. 

"Sorry, I-I just... I take online school so I can get more hours here," he murmured, looking up at Jensen only slightly. He hadn't meant to laugh; it was just that the whole situation of Jensen lying about what he did but Jared actually knowing his real occupation just struck his funny bone. "Did you go to school at all?" he asked, hoping to God Jensen wouldn't leave because Jared laughed at his fake career.

Jensen raised an eyebrow, slightly insulted.

"What are you laughing about? Do you not believe me?" Obviously, if he was actually a lawyer, he would've had to go to school. Obviously, Jared didn't believe him if he asked him that question.

"N-No! That's not it, I..." Jared struggled to find a valid excuse and took a shaky breath. "I--" The bell chimed right on cue and Jared almost fell down shooting out of his chair to take the person's order. His heart was a jackhammer against his ribcage and he panted slightly from how scared he was that he could lose the chance to talk to Jensen. After he handed the coffee back to the stranger and watched her leave, he walked slowly, timidly up to the table again. "Am... Am I still able to sit with you?" Jared asked, staring at his feet, completely embarrassed.

Jensen studied the man giant for a few seconds, then it dawned on him. 

"You know, don't you?" he asked, his tone both accusing and horrified. If Jared knew, then... Well, he didn't know what he would do. If Jared didn't know, Jensen would probably never show is face again anyway because he didn't need the other being suspicious. The question was suspicious enough and if Jared didn't know what he was talking about, then he would look like a nutjob. "And don't you dare lie to me," he added, tone hushed.

Jared's eyes widened and he sighed, trembling hand running through his messy hair. 

"Yeah," he said with a nod, looking down at the man with hesitant eyes. "I'm sorry... I j-just really wanted you to come back," he mumbled, lowering his eyes to the floor. "If you don't want to come back now, I get it. I won't mind..."

Jensen stared at him for a moment, thinking about his options. 

"Did you tell anyone?" It was the most important question that came to mind. 

"No. No one," Jared said, head raising so he could look at Jensen, his words wrapped in truth and promise. "A-And I won't tell anyone," he added, desperate for Jensen to keep going back to the little coffee shop. "If you stop coming, where else are you gonna get pie this good?" the male asked, smirking slightly. Despite the shyness that seeped out of every pore, Jared had a playful side as well.

Jensen stared at Jared, looking less than impressed. Finally, he cracked a smile and waved for the man to sit down. 

"Alright, you got me. Sit down and relax. I'm not going anywhere as long as you keep the pie coming," he teased.

Jared sat and smiled as well, six foot four body thrumming with happiness. 

"You know, I also make pecan, cherry, and pumpkin if you're ever feelin' a lil' dangerous," he laughed, bright hazel eyes fixated on the emerald gems that were across from him. "I know you probably don't want me asking, but... What are you doing here in Texas?" he asked.

Jensen surprisingly didn't care that Jared was asking. He didn't mind that Jared knew; it actually felt like a weight was off his shoulders. Maybe he could get free pie too. 

"I'm shootin' a movie about two miles from here. Don't tell anyone okay?" He placed his finger over his lips playfully. "Since you know so much about me, I gotta ask. Who's really the guy you were worked up about when I came in?" He couldn't help the slight smirk that appeared on his face. It was probably stupid to assume that Jared was crushing on him but...

Well, not really that stupid. It was completely possible.

Jared had nodded and took his fork to eat more pie, then almost choked on the dessert at the question, having to swallow quickly and get some air in his lungs. 

"I don't really think I should say their name or anything... I've already told you too much about him," Jared said, knowing that was a lame excuse. "I can tell you other things you'd wanna know, though," Jared offered.

Jensen raised an eyebrow but shrugged; he wouldn't lose sleep over it. 

"So, tell me about you, then. Anything that comes to mind. Go." He leaned his chin on his hand, watching the hazel eyed man intensely.

"I really like dogs," Jared blurted, smiling once again. "I volunteer at a shelter on my days off and they have such a cute dog named Harley and I wish I could take'im home but I don't have enough money to take care of a dog or enough room for that matter..." Jared trailed off, a tiny pout crossing over his lips. "Sorry for rambling. Do you have any dogs back home?" he asked, curious. So far, no news sources said he owned any pets.

Jensen tilted his head in curiosity. 

"I'd love to see the shelter sometime. When's your next day off?" He then shook his head to Jared's question. "I never had the chance to get a dog of my own. I'm always gone. It does get lonely, though. A dog sounds like a nice companion..." he answered thoughtfully. Maybe he would get a dog of his own. 

"Sunday this week. I can show you there and... Maybe show you around town, too?" Jared suggested.

Fuck.

Did he just ask superstar actor Jensen Ackles out? It wouldn't have to be considered a date, they could just be hanging out, but still! 

"Only if you want to, I bet you're really busy," Jared said, hoping Jensen would accept his offer.

Jensen nodded and finished his coffee. 

"I'd like that, Jared. We could get dinner afterwards. On me." He winked. It could be a date, or it could just be two friends going to dinner after spending the day together. It was all up to interpretation. Jared's interpretation.

Jared nodded excitedly and grinned. 

"That would be awesome! Besides pie, what other foods do you like?" he queried. Jared knew what Jensen liked in general, but it would be cool to hear it for himself. 

Jensen chuckled. 

"I like most foods. Can't have shellfish, though. Allergic. What I like the most is a nice juicy steak. Those are always good." Speaking of steaks, he probably needed to stop eating so much pie and work on his protein intake. He hadn't had a proper meal that day since he was filming the whole morning. "Hey, Jared, wanna grab something to eat after you get off?"

The question caught Jared off guard and he beamed that woman-killer grin, complete with dimples. 

"Sure! I get off in about..." Jared checked his phone, "an hour. You okay to wait?" he asked, standing from the table so he could clean up and close the coffee shop.

Jensen nodded and waved. 

"I'll be right here. I think Jessica was spamming my phone, anyway. Gotta see what she wanted." He pulled out his phone but not before he looked up to gauge Jared's reaction to his costar's name.

Jared's smile faltered and he just nodded, leaving the table to close up for the night.


	3. Chapter 3

"Alright, um, who's car do we take?" he asked, standing awkwardly. He had taken his apron off and his navy blue shirt underneath framed his muscular but smallish torso well, his jeans loose but nice against his lower body. "And where did you want to go?" he asked as well, nibbling on his lip.

Jensen shoved his hands into his pockets.

"I didn't bring a car. I walked here from the set," he admitted with a shrug. "And I don't really know any restaurants. Are there any good steakhouses around here?" He tilted his head and watched Jared's lip get sucked between his teeth. The poor lip was being chewed to the point where it was puffy and red like he had been kissing someone for hours. It was a look Jensen found that he liked on Jared.

Jared thought for a moment before nodding.

"Yeah, I can drive us there. It's not too far," Jared said. "You ready?" he asked and when Jensen told him he was, he showed him to his car so they could both get in and Jared could begin the drive. He had an old car, 90,000 miles on it, and it idled very loudly.

"I bet you're used to luxury cars, so, I'm sorry," Jared laughed out an apology.

Jensen shook his head and smiled at Jared.

"Hey, don't worry about it. Old cars have personality. I think with a tune up and a paint job, she'd be absolutely beautiful." Jensen ran a hand over the dashboard of the car, admiring the potential that it had. "I have a '67 Impala that I restored myself. It's a hobby."

Jared's eyes widened and he smiled again.

"No way? That's so awesome, man! Who would've thought you worked on cars as a hobby?" Jared chuckled, pulling into the steakhouse.

Both got out and headed inside; it wasn't too crowded but Jared was afraid Jensen would be noticed all too quickly.

They were seated by a swooning server and greeted by a flirtatious waitress. So much for people not recognizing Jensen.

Jensen, of course, was used to the attention and flashed his award winning smile towards anyone who looked his way. He let some people pose with him but when they were done, he dropped the smile and looked at Jared.

"This is why I went to your coffee shop instead of a Starbucks," he murmured to the man.

Jared laughed again and grinned.

"I'm glad you did," he said, red blooming across his cheeks. They ordered and after a bit of talking and waiting, their food arrived. Jared had gotten just a side; they were cheapest. He dug into his mac and cheese and made an oddly sexual sound of approval.

"How's yours?" he asked.

Jensen didn't even take a bite of his; he was watching Jared and listening to those moans.

"Why didn't you get something else? I can afford it, Jared." The more Jared ate, the more he moaned. Honestly those moans were pornographic.

Jared swallowed and dabbed at his lips with his napkin and huffed a laugh.

"I wasn't expecting you to pay for me," he admitted, looking at the other male's untouched food. "Why aren't you eating?" he asked, taking another spoonful of the orgasmic mac and cheese. "You wanna try mine?" he offered, pushing forward the tiny bowl a tad.

Jensen shook his head.

"I told you dinner was on me, Jared. Get something else, it's okay." He looked at the bowl that pulled sweet moans from the man's mouth. "I'll try yours if you try a piece of my steak," the actor offered.

"Okay," Jared agreed, switching their plates so he could properly cut off a small chunk of steak to plop in his mouth. Another subconcious moan slipped past his mouth and his eyelids slipped shut over his hazel eyes. He moved the plate back to Jensen. "I live off of muffins and ramen so I rarely taste such good stuff," he explained. "And, it's fine, you don't have buy me anything tonight. Maybe you could buy me ice cream some time," the man suggested, looking up at the other shyly.

Jensen took a small spoonful of Jared's macaroni and cheese and hummed in appreciation.

"Delicious. I can see why you moan." He gave Jared a small smirk and leaned forward. "You baked me a pie and you drove me to this restaurant. Let me return the favor." His eyes smoldered as he watched Jared. There was no doubt that he slid an innuendo into his words.

"I-I was moaning?" the younger male squeaked, averting his eyes. "Sorry," he murmured and grunted at the other man's innuendo. It was driving him crazy. Why was Jensen flirting so openly with Jared if he was dating his co-star? "U-Um... So what's your movie about?" he changed the subject, trying to slyly adjust himself in his pants.

Jensen chuckled.

"I don't mind the moaning. It's cute." He paused to eat some steak, moaning at the taste. Sure, it was a little exaggerated, but he liked it. He was an actor, after all. "Can't tell you what it's about, still early in production. But it's action. That's as much as I can tell you."

Jared was fixated on Jensen's lips as the meat passed through them. The sounds of pleasure went straight to the man's groin and he breathed in sharply. He wasn't as hungry for macaroni as he was for Jensen.

"Okay, well, if you're still talking to me by the time you finish shooting, you better tell or else," Jared threatened playfully, taking a cautious bite of his noodles, being sure not to be embarrassing and moan again.

Jensen raised an eyebrow and set his silverware down.

"Why wouldn't I be talking to you? You severely underestimate how much I enjoy your company."

"I dunno... You're famous and I'm just... Well, me," Jared answered.

Jensen looked between Jared's small bowl and his large plate of steak and potatoes.

 _Fuck it_ , he thought. He cut his steak in half and put the chunk on a small plate.

"Since you're stubborn." He slid the plate towards Jared, wanting the man to actually get some protein in him. Carbs on their own are the devil.

When the chunk of meat was pushed to Jared, he couldn't help but dig in. It had been a while since he had a decent meal; last time was at his parents' house for Christmas.

"Thank you," he said with a shy smile. "Do you like Texas?" Jared asked after a moment.

"It's nice, just so fuckin' hot this time of the year." Jensen watched the man dig in, a smug feeling filling his chest. He knew Jared wanted to eat more. The guy was a couple of inches taller than Jensen but still lean. He was sure if Jared stripped his shirt Jensen would be able to see a faint outline of his ribs.

Jared nodded at what the other was saying, chuckling slightly.

"Yeah, it's as hot as hell out here," he mused, looking up at the celebrity.

"Also, what's wrong with being you? I think you're fine just the way you are," Jensen said and took a swig of his beer and looked at Jared expectantly.

The words that came out of Jensen's mouth made the butterflies in Jared's stomach frenzy, and his heart began pounding faster. He had no idea how much he affected Jared.

"Uh, well... I'm not rich, o-or talented, really. Not famous and I'm really shy," he listed reasons as to why Jensen _shouldn't_ enjoy his company. _God_ , he was awkward.

Jensen rolled his eyes at Jared's ramblings.

"So you think you need to be rich and famous for me to like you? Do you think I'm that shallow?" He wasn't sure what he felt more, insulted or hurt. "And so what you're shy? Half of the planet is. And you're talented as all hell. Your pie skills are out of this fucking world. You're sweet to everyone you meet. I haven't known you long, but I know you're being way too modest."

The blush on Jared's face got deeper and deeper, tinting his ears and neck as well.

"N-No, I just... I thought that I would be boring to you," Jared whispered, keeping his eyes downcast. A small smile graced his lips until his teeth began pulling at his lower one once again. "I'm sorry, I'm just not used to talking to famous people, but, thank you," he said with a sigh. "Before you leave back to LA, I'll make you a couple pies and give you the recipes, yeah?" Jared didn't mind that he had to pay his own money to make the pies as long as Jensen like them so much. Jared couldn't help the smile that crossed over his features as he ate the rest of his small dinner.

"That sounds amazing. Of course, if someone helps me eat all of them. I'd like to spend more time talking to you." He smiled at the man and watched as Jared nibbled on that damn lip again. So plump and...

"Everything tastin' good here? Can I get you _anything_ else?" their waitress said when she approached the table, batting her eyelashes and pushing out her breasts. It was no secret that she was displaying herself for Jensen.

Jensen's eyes dipped down to the girl's cleavage and back up to her face.

"Everything was perfect. Just need the check, sweetheart," he cooed before looking back at Jared. "Unless you want dessert, Jared?"

The younger male's smile fell away once he saw Jensen check out the waitress.

"N-No... I should get home soon. Got homework and all," he mumbled, pulling his phone out of his pocket to check the time. It was only 7:30 and his homework wouldn't take long but his heart was heavy in his chest and he just wanted to get home and not feel broken.

The waitress nodded and smiled flirtatiously at Jensen.

"I'll be back with the check as soon as possible." She walked off, a sweet swaying of her hips drawing Jensen's eyes back to the curve of her ass.

When she was out of sight, Jensen turned back to Jared.

"Do you have work tomorrow? How long does your homework usually take?" He hadn't thought about school in a long while. He didn't really care about school, but he wanted to keep Jared talking.

Jared felt weirdly offended. Why in the hell would Jensen feign interest with him then blatantly check someone else out? It hurt.

"Yeah. And not too long. But I just want to get it done so I can work on this thing I'm writing," he said blandly, the brightness the was previously in his eyes snuffed out, the dull but still brilliant hazel looking anywhere but Jensen.

Jensen tilted his head and looked over Jared.

"Oh yeah? You like to write?" he asked and smiled, trying to help cheer the man up. "What do you like to write?" He could tell something was bothering Jared and he wanted to clear the man's head. What better way than to talk about Jared's passion?

Jared smiled sadly.

 _You don't have to pretend to enjoy my company_ , Jared thought.

"I like writing fiction. The story I'm writing right now isn't very detailed yet. It's just a basic outline of each chapter, some random bits and pieces of what'll go in the paragraphs," he explained. The waitress came back with their check and Jared immediately saddened once again. He couldn't help but feel as if Jensen was just humoring him.

Jensen opened the check and saw the waitress's number was written in there. He grabbed the small paper and stuck it in his pocket.

 _Could come in handy. Might call her tonight_ , Jensen mused inwardly. He dropped a couple of bills in the booklet and Jared gave him the eight dollars he owed for his macaroni.

"Fiction, huh? I bet you're really good. I'd love to read something of yours sometime. Maybe I'll even be an actor in a movie based on your books," Jensen said and winked at the man with an award winning smile.

Jared huffed and rolled his eyes playfully.

"It's hard to get a book even published. You'll be like, 60, by the time I get an actual book published," he laughed softly. He didn't see the other grab at the paper that had the phone number written down, so his spirits were lifting slightly. Maybe Jensen was just checking her out in some sort of evolutionary way; trying to scope out a good mate for populating and whatnot, right?

The two stood and headed out to the parking lot.

"Are you gonna call a cab so I don't know where you're staying at?" Jared asked genuinely.

Jensen chuckled and smiled.

"I'm going to take a cab, but nothing against you. Just wanna get home. Have a nice night, okay, Jared?" He walked Jared to his old car, standing next to the taller man.

"Okay," Jared mumbled, hoping Jensen would've said he could take him home. "I'll see you later," he said and waved once before getting in to drive away to his small apartment.

Jensen watched Jared's car turn onto the slightly busy street and turned back to the restaurant. He dumped the lady's number and just went straight inside. By talking to her in person, he avoided a potential phone number leak. He didn't need his number all over the internet after a one night stand.

Once the waitress was off of work, Jensen went back to her place and spent the night doing very... Intimate activities.

\---------

Jared's homework didn't take as long as he thought it would, but his mind was swimming with Jensen as he did it. He sat in bed with his laptop, lightly tapping away to further his book. He got bored and started browsing Facebook, eyelids starting to droop. He fell asleep half laying down, the brightness of the E! News Facebook page the only thing illuminating his sleeping face until it faded to black.

\---------

Jared snorted awake, rubbing at his eyes. His alarm hadn't gone off so he didn't have to get ready for work for another...

He took his computer off standby to check the time but was by assaulted by the refreshed E! News page headline of:

_"New Boo? See Who Jensen Ackles Is Getting Frisky With!"_

His stomach dropped and a lump formed in his throat. Jared knew he shouldn't be so upset, the guy was obviously into girls, so he wasn't flirting before. Jared wiped angry tears from his eyes and texted his coworker to ask if he could take over his shift. He did _not_ want to be there if Jensen showed up again. Once he got the okay from his coworker and boss, he put his laptop on his bedside table and opened the small drawer. A tiny baggy filled with pot, a lighter, pipe, and a grinder were the only contents. He took them all out and headed to his writing desk, opening up the window in front of it, and sat in his chair to begin smoking. He used it as an escape whenever his depression got bad. He'd dealt with depression since his late teens and nothing had helped more than the marijuana he was introduced to at 17.

\---------

Jensen made a good call by going to Courtney's--was that her name?--the night before. If he had taken her back to his room... Well, E! news wasn't exactly slow on getting stories about his sex life. His only regret was not grabbing a change of clothes before he left. Not that he had anticipated getting laid.

\---------

As soon as Jensen stepped on set, he was teased by Richard.

" _So_ , you have a new boo?" The actor grinned and nudged Jensen's ribs. "That why you didn't come with us last night? You could've just said so!"

Jensen glared at the other and shook his head.

"It was unplanned. I went to a restaurant and the chick I met last night was the waitress." He shrugged. He always had plenty of one night stands but was rarely caught, and even then, he wasn't embarrassed.

\---------

Jared sucked in the bitter smoke, filling his lungs up completely and holding it before leaning and blowing it out of the window. He was pretty sure the landlord knew he smoked, but his dimpled smile and on-time payments were enough to have her let him stay. He giggled at the thought that she would let him stay because she thinks he's into her. He then growled softly because wasn't that what Jensen was doing to him? Practically making him think he'd be interested? Jared took another angry puff of his pipe, closing his eyes and trying to relax further into his swivel chair.

\---------

Jensen was sweaty and covered in makeup that looked like dirt by the end of filming. He tossed his fake gun to the props coordinator and headed towards his trailer to freshen up. He needed a nice hot shower before going to go see Jared. He was excited to see the man again.

\---------

Jared finished off an entire bowl and a half, dumping the ash outside the window and putting the rest of the weed back in the bag and everything else away into the drawer. He trudged up to his fridge and got the filtered water then grabbed a bowl from the cabinet, and ramen from the pantry to make his shitty snack, all the while grumbling internally about Jensen.

After he had eaten, he laid back in bed to zone out watching one of the douche's movies.

 _Fuckin' asshole. Bein' all fuckin Carmen Electra-y with his hotness_ , Jared thought bitterly, and then a sex scene began on his small laptop screen. Jensen's defined muscles were the object for reverent touches by the female lead, his big lips traveling all over her, down her stomach, to below her navel.

Despite Jared being pretty much fully gay--there were a few women he could appreciate in more ways than one--he found himself getting hard as he watched. It ended all too soon and he whined, turning off the movie and instead pulled up a pornography website.

He palmed his cock through his grey sweatpants as he watched and sighed, eyes eventually closing as images of Jensen flashed through his mind. He knew it would take him a while to come because his thoughts always traveled onto less pornographic subjects while he was high and trying to jerk it. But he had all day to play with himself. He used his other hand to shut the laptop and then got settled, widening his legs as he tugged his member at a leisurely pace.

\---------

When Jensen finished showering and deemed himself presentable, he slipped off of set and started for the coffee shop.

But Jared wasn't there when he arrived.

He walked up to the barista and glared at him through his sunglasses.

"Where's Jared? I thought he worked today." There was no time for small talk, he didn't even try asking for a coffee. He wanted to know where Jared was.

"Called out of work today. Try again tomorrow," the teen behind the counter answered in a bored tone. He didn't care about the guy he was covering for, he just needed the extra money to save up for a car.

Jensen didn't like the fact that the teen was being so disrespectful, but he disregarded it.

"Find his address in less than half an hour and I'll give you $300 dollars."

The teen's eyes practically bulged out of his head. Why the fuck would this guy want Jared's address? What was so important about Jared? If he was worth $300, surely he could be worth more.

"$500 and I'll find it in less than ten."

Jensen pulled out a wad of hundred dollar bills and folded ten of them in half.

"Find it now and this $1,000 is yours," he said, slapping the money on the counter.

The teen didn't even try to counter that offer, running to the back like there was a fire on his ass. In two minutes flat, he ran back to Jensen with Jared's full name, address, and other information. Jensen just needed the name and address, though. He took a picture of the info he needed and put his phone back in his pocket.

"That's it. Thanks." He walked away, leaving the thousand dollars for the teen. If this was a cartoon, the teen's eyes would've had dollar signs in them.

Jensen stepped out of the store and called a cab to take him to Jared's place.

\---------

Jared was furiously pumping his cock, hips bucking up into his fist as his other was between his legs, three fingers deep in himself. The moans that were slipping past his bitten lips were obscene and he didn't even care if his neighbors heard.

_"You like that baby?" Jensen purred, slamming into Jared over and over again._

_"God, yes, Jensen!" Jared whined, two hands planted firmly on the other male's ass to try to push him in deeper._

_"Want my cum in you, sweetheart?" the older man groaned, his own pleasured breaths faltering slightly._

_"Please, please, J-Jen," Jared responded, back arching up with ecstasy as he felt cum flood his ho--_

"Oh, come on!" Jared yelled, taking his fingers out of his ass and sitting up in bed with an annoyed grunt. He was right there, about to come, but some asshole just _had_ to knock. He didn't even give a shit as to how his sweatpants had dampened spots, or the fact that his dick was still bulging inside the pants as he walked to the front. Didn't even give a shit that his nipples were still perky like it was winter in his house as he opened the door.

"Jensen?!" Jared yipped and shut the door slightly, so only his face showing. God, did Jensen fucking hear him? "What do you want? How the hell did you find my place?" Jared asked incredulously, actually angry. His eyes were still bloodshot but his mouth was dry from nervousness.

Jensen took a moment to process the sight in front of him. Jared's pupils were blown from lust and his eyes were lined with red. His lips were puffy and he looked breathless. He was just masturbating... To Jensen. Honestly, he didn't know if he was about to smirk or throw Jared against the wall so he could make the man's fantasies a reality.

"I bribed your coworker. You were supposed to be at work today," was all he could come up with in regards to Jared's question. His eyes flickered down to what he could see of Jared's outfit, unconsciously licking his lips when he saw Jared was barely clothed.

Jared curled in on himself slightly.

"You bribe my coworker into making him give you my address yet you lied to me about getting a cab home and instead went and fucked that fucking waitress?" Jared spat, glaring holes into Jensen. "Why the fuck would you flirt with me then turn around and bang some random girl?" Jared asked, genuine hurt in his reddened eyes. The pot ripped the filter off of Jared's mouth and he couldn't keep it back. "Did you think that I would put out easy then when I didn't, you went for her?" Jared growled. His mind was coming up with ridiculous scenarios.

Jensen's brows drew together at Jared's accusations.

"First of all, we aren't together. Who I fuck isn't any of your business. Second of all, I was worried because you didn't show up for work and you really don't look like the type to call out to get high." He crossed his arms and glared at the man, starting to get angry himself. "I was flirting with you because I happen to enjoy you and I wouldn't mind fooling around. When you talked about your crush or whatever, I dropped it because I'm not that much of a dick. I wasn't going to take advantage and swoop in when you were moping around. I wasn't waiting for you to put out so fuck you for thinking that!" His fists ended up clenched on his sides.

He couldn't understand why he was so pissed and so desperate to prove Jared wrong. Jared was no one, nothing to him. So why the hell did Jensen pay $1,000 for his address?

"Fuck this." The actor turned to walk to the elevator of the apartment building. The last thing he wanted was for someone to hear the shouting and call the police. His face on the news would ruin his career.

Tears began coating the younger male's eyes and dripped down his cheeks at the other's words. He was just so angry and he didn't mean to say what he had said. The moment Jensen turned away, Jared mindlessly snatched the other's bicep and pulled him back, whimpering pathetically.

"My crush was and still is on you," he admitted, hand tight around the man's upper arm. "P-Please... Don't leave," he whispered, tugging him slightly towards the door to go inside.

Jensen froze at both Jared's confession and the pleading. He looked at the other to try and tell him off again, but couldn't find it in himself to speak because he was staring into teary hazel eyes that took his breath away. Something happened whenever Jared cried that made a dash of blue come out of his mostly brown and green eyes. He was a beautiful crier.

"Alright. Just relax, Jared, I'm coming." He let the man lead him into his apartment and closed the door behind them. Jensen pulled Jared into a hug, both hands moving to the small of Jared's back. "I'm not dating my costar. Tabloids aren't always trustworthy believe it or not," he murmured.

Jared hid his face in the crook of Jensen's neck, sighing and sniffling. A weight lifted from his chest that was suffocating him and he felt like he could breathe again.

"I'm sorry," Jared murmured, resting his forehead on the other's shoulder. "Just... Thought you might've wanted more," he whispered, breaths shaky. "I already have a hard time thinking my family even loves me despite all they do for me... A-And... I was just so afraid you'd fuck me then leave. Seems like a pattern in my life," Jared confessed. He had no idea why he told Jensen such personal shit, but he couldn't help but feel... Better.

Jensen frowned and rubbed circles into Jared's back.

"Hey, don't think like that. Of course your family loves you. What's not to love?" He grabbed a tissue from the coffee table and used it to wipe Jared's face. "Has anyone told you that you're a beautiful crier?"

Jared shrugged, looking down at the ground.

"A lot of things are wrong with me," he said, sighing once more. "And a beautiful crier? You think I'm beautiful when I'm feeling sad?" he asked, rolling his glossy orbs. "No, no one has told me that. Once I start crying, they usually just tell me to stop or that I'm being dramatic," he explained.

Jensen rolled his eyes right back.

"I'm an actor. I get paid to be dramatic," he reminded the man. "Your eyes practically glow and they're so hypnotic. It takes some professionals a _lot_ of eye drops and facial exercises to look the way you do when you cry. It's amazing to see it natural like that." He tilted Jared's chin up so he could look the man in the eyes. "See? What some might see wrong with you, others will find beauty in. You can't please everyone. You've just been hanging around assholes."

Jared's heart fluttered and he ripped at his lip once again.

"Thank you," he said quietly with another sniffle. "D...D'ya wanna see what I've been writing?" he asked. He had never shared his writing with another person ever. It was so personal to him but... Jensen just tore his guard down.

"Sure, I'd love to, Jay," Jensen said and put his hands in his jacket pockets.

Pink surfaced on Jared's cheeks and neck and he nodded quickly, scurrying to his bedroom to change, leaving Jensen in the living room.

He fell over trying to put on regular pants, the thump of his huge body and grunts obvious through the closed door but were comical nonetheless. He got up and pulled his pants up the rest of the way, throwing on a regular t-shirt before leaving the bedroom to go back to Jensen.

"Uh, I don't really have guests over but, do you want any food? Water? Weed?" he asked. Jared was socially awkward and he hated himself for it.

Jensen grinned, finding Jared's stumbling to be adorable.

"Water is fine. Just relax, Jared. I'm not here to judge you." Jensen sat on the small couch and waited for Jared to come to him. He got a good look at the place while Jared was getting water. It was small and simple. It screamed college student with a horrible sleep schedule, though. Jensen spotted an empty coffee cup under the table and a ramen wrapper hanging off of the trash can, half in and half out. He was sure if he went to Jared's bedroom he would find the same thing.

Jared came back into the room with a cup of water and then went to get his laptop from his room. He sat beside Jensen, definitely not purposely sitting close enough to touch. He opened his laptop and immediately shut it again, red burning his face. He hadn't closed out the porn website before shutting the laptop before. He turned so the back of the laptop was facing Jensen and closed the tab as quickly as he could and then turned back with an innocent little word document open.

"109 pages of just an outline," he said proudly.

Jensen pretended not to see the familiar colors of his favorite porn site.

"You okay Jared?" he asked with a hint of a smirk. "Got a little red there." He took the laptop from Jared and started scrolling through the document, his eyes widening every so often as he read the piece.

The guy was good.

Jared was still flushed, the mention of his redness just making him blush more. He studied Jensen's face as he read and bit at his lip nervously.

"Do you like it...?" he asked quietly, nervous for the answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part of it wouldn't copy and I was too depressed at the time to re-copy everything and I do not have a copy of the story anymore. 
> 
> Basic summary of what happens:
> 
> Jensen loves the story then they go get ice cream, paparazzi finds them, the two go back and start smoking weed and that's what happened to lead into the next chapter.


	4. Chapter 4

Jensen looked up at Jared and slid the pipe back towards the man. 

"Shotgunning? Nope, don't know what it is." He was curious and also very sold on having pizza delivered. He was probably going to have to spend one of the upcoming days in the gym to work off all the junk but it was worth it.

Jared sat beside him and took a hit before explaining. 

"Well, just, stay still and open your mouth," he said before taking another hit and keeping it in his lungs, scooting closer to Jensen before hesitantly and gently slotting his lips against the older male's, exhaling the smoke into his mouth.

Jensen inhaled and closed his eyes, focusing more on Jared's lips against his than the smoke in his mouth. His hand rose to cup Jared's cheek and he kissed the man, letting the smoke leave their mouths without care.

Jared's slow kisses against Jensen made the perfect sound fill the air and he curled his fingers loosely in the t-shirt Jensen had on. 

"Wanted to do this for so long," he mumbled against soft lips, arms snaking up to wrap around the other's neck

Jensen's arm slid around Jared's waist, pulling the man closer and smiling against his lips. 

"Wanted to do this since you bit these lips in front of me," Jensen purred lowly, nipping Jared's lower lip for emphasis. His pulled his hand that had been resting upon Jared's hot cheek away to rest it on the man's back. Touching Jared felt even better than he imagined, especially since they were both high.

Jared whimpered softly, trying to adjust them so he was straddling the other's lap, kisses becoming more fervent and heated, his fingers tangling themselves in Jensen's hair. Softer than he had imagined. He slipped his tongue inside the man's mouth to explore, the taste of banana and weed still so prominent in his mouth.

Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's hips, his hands resting just above Jared's ass. He groaned into the kiss and took in the smoke and chocolatey taste that was Jared. He could feel his cock twitch in attention as the man shifted on his lap.

_God, this is so much better than the waitress._

Jared took his groan as approval and began grinding down harder. His dick was already swollen, breaths coming in soft pants. He pulled back only to take another hit them shotgun again, loving the feeling of euphoria mixed with the touch of Jensen.

"Fuck, want you so bad," he grumbled, hands slipping inside the male's shirt to slowly rub up and down his chiseled abdomen.

Jensen grabbed Jared's hips roughly and ground up into the man's ass.

"You don't know what you to do me, Jared," he breathed against the man's lips. He didn't know what the fuck he was saying, he just wanted to fuck Jared until the man was moaning his name louder than he was when Jensen caught him masturbating. His ass was probably so tight...

He pulled away to breathe and stared at Jared, his pink and chapped lips now plump and red from the aggressive kisses. 

Jared grunted at the loss of contact and slid his hands back down to the waistline of Jensen's pants. He began laughing. A full belly laugh that just felt so _right_.

"I-I just made out with my celebrity crush," he giggled, laying his head down on the male's shoulder tiredly after his laughing fit.

Jensen grinned and laid down on Jared's bed, the man laying over him as he giggled.

"Yeah, you did." Unfortunately, he was getting tired as well, and that meant he wasn't getting laid. But he liked it; laying down while holding Jared. He didn't usually cuddle the people he had one night stands with but Jared wasn't that kind of person. He was different.

Jared hummed happily and played with the older male's hair, kissing at his jawline.

"We should smoke together more," he said, voice practically like a purr but muffled against Jensen's neck. Without even waiting for Jensen's response, the younger fell asleep on top of him. It was a dream come true for Jared. He was absolutely enamored with the celebrity. Before, sure, he wanted to have sex with him, but he also felt like he wanted something more. A typical "fangirl" fantasy.

Jensen closed his eyes and soaked in the feeling when Jared was playing with his hair. He was torn between raging arousal and a content slumber. 

The warmth of Jared's body only helped lull the actor to sleep. Before long, he was just as unconscious as Jared, hands still on the other man's hips protectively.

\---------

When Jensen woke up, he felt like he had been sleeping for centuries. His eyelids were heavy and there was a weight on his chest where Jared's head was resting. He looked around for his phone to check the time. 

10:32 AM. He was startled that he had slept for almost 14 hours. Usually, he slept around only five or six hours a night. Even less than that when he was filming. 

Filming.

He was late for filming.

"Fuck!" he shouted, startling the man on top of him. Jared jumped off of Jensen and looked over at him with tired and frightened eyes. For a moment, Jensen admired how cute Jared looked before he shot out of bed. "I'm late. I was supposed to be on the set three hours ago!"

Jared was dreaming pleasantly about owning his own flower shop and Jensen was a tattoo artist next door to him before he was woken up. 

"Oh, God, I'm sorry," he muttered, raking a hand through sleep-messed hair. "I can drive you there if you want, I don't even need to get ready so we can go right now," he offered.

Jensen nodded and looked around.

"Mind if I use your bathroom? Gotta not look like I fell asleep high." He looked at his phone again, seeing three missed calls from Richard and four from his manager. "Fuck it, that's what makeup artists are for. Can we go now? What are you doing today? You can stay on set with me if you want." He looked at Jared, eager to get going. He could just say that Jared was a friend and he got drunk with him last night. Technically, they were friends and his peers didn't need to know he was actually getting high the previous night. That could work.

"I have work at 12, but I get off at seven. I could swing by and pick you up," he said, grabbing his keys and wallet. "Let's go," he said and walked out the door with Jensen.

\---------

They arrived at the set and he turned to Jensen and gave him an awkward pat on the back.

"Have fun," he said, smiling shyly.

Jensen smiled and nodded in return.

"See y'later Jared." He ruffled the man's hair as an act of affection, as well as to throw off the people he knew were watching them. He didn't want them thinking that Jared was any more than a friend. 

Even though he kind of was.

It wasn't that Jensen was in the closet; it was just that he had a bet going on with himself. None of the paparazzi or his coworkers knew that he liked to dabble with guys and he wanted to see how long it would take for others to realize. Maybe it was a little fucked up, but it was fun.

Jared raised a brow at the action but just laughed and pulled out of the parking lot. 

When he got back to his apartment to shower and change, he first checked Facebook to see if the paparazzi had sold the photos.

They did. 

_Ice Cream Day With New Friend!_

He breathed a sigh of relief, grinning. He was glad Jensen's heterosexuality front was still intact. He put his phone down and began to get ready for work.

Jensen was licking his lips all day. He couldn't help it. After he got yelled at for being late, his mind immediately drifted to Jared. He was glad the guy actually made a move because Jensen was tired of flirting without results. He wasn't going to make the first move if Jared didn't want it. 

Richard teased him about his sex hair and how he must've gotten laid before coming to the set. For every comment about Jensen's sex life, Jensen had a response. 

"So you'll go out to get laid but not to get drunk?"

"Some of us don't have to get drunk to get laid."

"Your hair looks like it lost a fight with a vacuum cleaner."

"Your ass is about to lose a fight with my foot." 

Yet Jensen never confirmed or denied that he got laid that night.

\---------

Jensen showered and changed his clothes in his trailer. At around seven, he contemplated walking to Jared's job but didn't. Jared said he'd come pick him up. Jensen decided to take Jared out to dinner again.

Except he was going to go home with Jared that same night.

Jared was distracted at work all day, thoughts of Jensen in the forefront of his mind. He hurried and closed up the shop before seven so he could get home and get ready to see Jensen. He brushed his hair, teeth, changed his outfit five times, and then finally left. 

He was waiting in the front lot where he had dropped the celebrity off and didn't know if he should go into the building or wait; he didn't have Jensen's number but planned on getting it that night.

Jensen strolled out of his trailer and spotted Jared's old car immediately. He told security he was leaving and walked over to the car, greeting the driver with a grin on his face.

"Hey there. Waited long?" He slipped into the passenger side and buckled himself in.

"Nah," Jared said, full Texan drawl lacing his speech. "Where did you wanna go? I know a cool lake we could go to," he mentioned, waiting for Jensen's opinion on the matter. "Oh, I also want your number so I don't have to wait awkwardly again," he said and pulled out his phone to set up a new contact before passing the phone to him.

Jensen smirked at the man's phone and took it.

"Very slick. I don't usually give my phone number out to anyone," he admitted before proceeding to type his number into the phone. "Want me to put a picture of myself?" he teased.

He opened the camera anyway and took a picture of himself making a provocative face. He stuck his tongue against his cheek and made a jerking movement with his hand. 

Jensen Ackles took a fake blowjob selfie and it was on someone's phone. It was absurd.

Jared began laughing hysterically, taking his phone back and pushing Jensen's shoulder. 

"Jerk," he chuckled and shifted his car into drive. "Wanna eat first or do you wanna see the lake?" he asked, wanting Jensen to choose. He reversed and backed out of the parking space and decided to just go and they'd make a decision in a second.

"Let's get food to go and eat by the lake. Don't want to get sprung by the paparazzi while we're eating. What are you in the mood to eat? It's on me again. As a thank you for being my cab driver." He winked at the man and then looked out the window as they drove. 

"Alright, cool, thank you," Jared said and drove to a Chinese place close to the lake. They had to walk to a little ways to get to the lake but made it just as the sun began to set. It was beautiful at night. Jared had also brought a soft blanket to put on the deep green grass. He had snuck his pipe, weed, and lighter into his food's bag. He brought the items out and wiggled his eyebrows. "Want some?" he asked.

Jensen looked at Jared and nodded.

"Would be nice. Weed and Chinese food. It's like college all over again." He grinned and waited for the man to pack the bowl.

Jared laughed and christened the smoke session by hitting it first, pink lips wrapping lovingly around his pipe. He sucked the smoke in slowly, inhaling it with closed eyes. He handed it to Jensen without opening them and hummed happily. 

"I love this shit," he said and opened his eyes to begin eating. He watched Jensen take some hits with reverent eyes as he chewed, then took the offered pipe back when the other male was done.

Jensen licked his lips and looked over at Jared. His plump lips had a habit of wrapping around things and sucking them lovingly. It was maddening. He licked his lips again and took a bite of his fried rice.

"You know," he started as Jared drank his soda. "It's a shame we fell asleep when we did last night. I wanted to sink my teeth into your ass," he sighed casually. He kept his face nonchalant, wanting to see Jared's reaction.

Jared choked slightly on his drink, the soda spilling from his mouth onto his shirt and crotch. 

"G-" a cough, "od, Jensen," he said, coughs following the sentence as well. "Look what you made me do," he whined and took off his shirt, chucking it to the side on the grass. A couple more coughs surpassed his lips, face red from the exertion of coughing and the heat that rose to the surface from Jensen's remark. "You think you could keep me awake?" he challenged. "Not sure if it'd feel good enough to make me stay awake," he laughed, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

Jensen looked around for any sign of cameras. When he found none, he leaned in to whisper into Jared's ear.

"The only way you'd be going to sleep is if you pass out from me fucking your brains out, sweetheart. I don't have unsatisfied customers." He nipped Jared's earlobe and pulled away with a dirty smirk.

Jared shuddered, his munchies long forgotten as he cock swelled within the confines of his pants.

"Fuckin' tease," he growled and tackled Jensen, pinning his wrists down and straddling his lap. He studied the older male's beautiful face for a moment before gently attaching his lips to Jensen's.

Jensen chuckled and broke the hold on his wrists easily, his hands going to Jared's hips to stabilize the man. He kissed him back, paying special attention to his lips by sucking sweetly on them.

"Ungh," Jared groaned, loving the feeling of the suction on his lips. He began grinding down and shoved his tongue inside the other male's mouth lovingly when he could, nipples hard peaks from arousal. Just the fact that it was _Jensen_ he was kissing was driving him wild.

Jensen pulled away from the kiss, his eyes burning with lust.

"We should go back to your place. Don't want to be interrupted." He sat up and pressed his lips to Jared's again, his mind focused on Jared's lips and the feeling of Jared's ass pressing against his cock.

Jared nodded and tried to keep hips lips connected to the other man's as much as he could as he packed up their things and got into his car.

\---------

Jared threw the Chinese on the counter haphazardly and set his paraphernalia down as well before tugging Jensen into his room. He pulled the man down onto the bed and kissed him passionately, like he was afraid he would leave if he stopped.

Jensen groaned and bit Jared's lower lip appreciatively. His hands slipped down the back of Jared's pants, gripping the perky globes and using that force to rock Jared onto his cock. The actor moaned into the kiss and hardened to the point to where his cock was straining to break out of his pants.

Jared whimpered and arched his back from the touch, sitting up to tear Jensen's hands away from him and practically rip off his shirt. He wiggled downward to bite and suckle at the hardening nubs, hands working on getting the male's pants down as quickly as possible. When he pulled them down, he gasped softly. It was bigger than he thought it would be. Fan fiction had never stated the size the authors thought he'd be.

"Holy fuck..." Jared whispered, sitting back to float gentle fingers down the length. A thought then occurred to him and he laughed. "You knew you were gonna get laid tonight so you didn't wear underwear," he chuckled before loosely grabbing a hold of the massive dick and stroking it almost affectionately, learning the curves and dips caused by the bulging veins and crown. Slowly, he dipped back down and tentatively ran his tongue back and forth across the head.

Jensen licked his lips and watched Jared, occasionally moaning.

"Baby, I never wear underwear." He hissed once Jared gripped his cock and watched the man with a lusty haze in his eye. "Gonna suck my cock, Jay? I wanna see your sweet pink lips wrapped around my dick." He ran a gentle hand through Jared's hair.

"Uh-huh," Jared sounded before slipping the thick rod between his lips. He was nervous; Jensen must've had better people in bed with him. He hollowed out his cheeks and moved downward, trying his best not to gag as it got further into his throat. He swallowed experimentally before pulling up and coughing into his arm. "Sorry," he laughed, the incessant blush never leaving his cheeks. He settled for laying in between the man's legs, holding the cock by its base to sloppily kiss up the pulsing shaft, hazel eyes half-lidded. On some level, Jared knew he was trying to be seductive but he also wanted to gauge the other's reactions. Again, he sucked the cock back into his mouth, bobbing his head slowly, hand jerking the part that wasn't enveloped in wet heat.

Jensen groaned and held back from closing his eyes. He wanted to see Jared as he sucked and pumped on his cock.

"You have such great cock sucking lips. God, I wish you could see yourself." He bit his lip and watched jared, slightly tightening his grip on the man's hair. "Fucking beautiful."

Jared winced but reveled in the pain, bobbing his head even faster. His unoccupied hand shoved itself down his own pants to begin tugging at his own leaking dick. Hearing Jensen moan, because of _him_ , made him as hard as he ever could be.

"Wan'oo," he said, "want you" coming out as best as it could around the thick member in his mouth.

"I need lube, baby. I gotta prep you." Jensen pulled Jared up by his hair, making sure not to pull too hard because he didn't want to hurt him. He kissed Jared's saliva-coated lips and started pushing Jared's pants off, his hands roaming over Jared's bare skin. "Where's the lube?" he panted against Jared's lips.

Jared groaned at his words and motioned to the drawer in the bedside table. As Jensen got it, Jared positioned himself on the bed, on his back, feet planted on the comforter.

"Please, God, hurry up, Jensen," he grunted, tugging at his own cock furiously. Everything felt so good, like electricity was being injected into every vein.

Jensen smirked and flicked the cap open. Cool gel spread his fingers and Jensen took in the sight before him. His eyes were drawn to his prize, Jared's pink pucker that clenched every time he bucked in pleasure. 

He traced his finger around the hole and slowly pushed it in.

"You know, I heard you masturbating yesterday," he mentioned down at the man. He hovered over Jared's head, staring down at the pleasured, flushed face. "Heard you begging for me to fuck you. You whimpered so sweetly and you were doing it yourself. Can't wait to see what sounds y'make when you have my cock inside that tight hole of yours."

Jared sucked in a sharp breath, his hand still on his dick as he felt the digit inside him. Embarassment flooded his features and he bit his swollen lower lip, a moan snapping out of him when Jensen had crooked his fingers just right.

"I did wish for this," he laughed, the sound heavy but light all at the same time. Another brush to his prostate had him gasping once more; his prostate had always been--what he thought to be--more sensitive than normal and he couldn't get enough of the feeling.

Jensen licked his lips and slid another finger in, stretching and thrusting and bending his fingers to hit the right spots in Jared. The man was so responsive that Jensen was half considering making him come on just his fingers before fucking him.

"Love how fucking receptive you are. Anybody told you how pretty you look when you get your ass fingered?" Jensen had a filthy mouth on screen but it was nowhere near as bad as his mouth in bed. He loved to coo and praise and spew filth to his partners. They never complained, either.

"Hngh, no," Jared moaned, wiggling his ass back meet the fingers, practically hungry for Jensen in any way possible. He took his hand off of his cock so he could take Jensen's head in both hands and bring him down for a wet kiss, pleasured mewls getting lost in the other's mouth.

Jensen moaned into the kiss and kept running his fingers along Jared's prostate. His free hand found Jared's cock and started pumping it with lube to slick the way. He wanted to see Jared come undone, feel him clench around his fingers. He wanted Jared to remember who made him see stars.

Jared didn't even kiss, his mouth just stayed open as streams of musical arousal filled the air around them.

"Jensen!" he yelled as he came, white cream coating his stomach. "Oh, fuck, Jensen... Jensen..." he panted, the name like a prayer to him.

Jensen smirked down at the man, his lips trailing down to nip at his neck.

"Ready for me, Jay? Or do you need a little more--" he thrusted his fingers again into the sensitive hole. "--tme to regain your breath?" His hand slowed its pumping on Jared's cock but didn't stop altogether. He kept stroking the sensitive cock, tracing his thumb over the tip and collecting the cum. "You made a mess, baby."

"Oh!" Jared gasped, writhing underneath Jensen, batting his hand away from his cock. "G-Give it to me. Been wanting this for forever," he growled, the sound punctuated by another sharp gasp as his prostate was rammed into once more. He sat up to reach over and grab a condom from his nightstand drawer. He ripped it open and sat up even further, trying to roll the thin rubber down over Jensen's shaft as quickly as he could with shaking hands.

Jensen chuckled and pulled his hands away to get more lube. It never hurt to have more and he really didn't want to stop because he hurt Jared.

"Your wish is my command, Jared," the actor purred, smoothing his cock before he pushed the tip of it into Jared's tight heat.

Jared's face contorted into something other than pleasure for a mere second before he was relaxing around the thick invader. He gently touched his softening cock and spasmed slightly.

"Make me come without touching myself," he challenged, looking up at Jensen with nothing but honest eyes.

Jensen smirked.

"Be careful what you wish for." He hooked Jared's legs over his shoulders and pinned the man's wrists to the bed. The position was ideal for fucking right into Jared's sweet spot while keeping Jared restrained. Jensen could do all of this while watching the other's perfect face scrunch up and flush in pleasure.

Game on.

Jensen sank the rest of his cock inside of Jared and groaned at the tightness around him. When Jared was ready, Jensen set an intermediate pace, not going too fast and just barely brushing Jared's prostate. Jensen _may_ have wanted him to beg.

" _Oh, fuck_ ," Jared whimpered, hands raking down Jensen's back, drawing red in his skin as he was fucked, the thick shaft stretching him burning slightly but in the best way possible. When Jensen set the pace, Jared was already squirmimg to try to get his dick as deep in him as it could go. "C'mon, Jensen, faster," he whined, the sound breathy and lust filled.

Jensen slowed his pace and pushed into Jared again until his balls were flush against Jared's ass.

"Wanna hear you beg, baby. Wanna see how much of a cock slut you can be." He ground his hips against Jared's, his cock pushing against Jared's prostate. He wanted to tease Jared enough to make him see stars. It was a wonder that he was restraining himself to not fuck into the heat and use it until Jared was a crying, pleasured mess.

Wait.

He changed his mind. As soon as Jared opened his mouth, Jensen pulled his cock out only to slam back in. He had a new desire. Jared, flushed with drool and tears coming down his face. He let go of his control and started to pound into Jared, not taking his eyes off of his face.

Jared yelped at the sudden pounding, his fingernails digging half moons in the man's back. The repeated slammimg of his prostate had him coming all over again, the warm cum coating his chest with another layer. 

"Fuck! Jensen!" he yelprd, tears slipping down the sides of his face from how good it felt. After a moment, the relentless pounding still didn't let up, and he began crying, the feeling too good, too much.

"J-Jen, it's t-too much," he groaned, panting as he continued to cry slightly, hazel eyes bright with tears.

"You want me to stop, you say "cut". I'm going to keep fucking your sweet ass unless you say it," Jensen growled as he admired the wet eyes. "So fucking pretty when you cry, you know that?" Jensen let out a particularly loud moan as Jared clenched around him. The man was tighter and warmer than anyone Jensen had ever been with. It was amazing. "You're so fucking tight, Jay. Might just use this hole everytime I get hard. Have you on standby to fuck whenever I want."

"J- _Jen_ ," the younger whimpered, the filth coming from his mouth only turning him on despite it being too much. "Please," he begged, unsure of what wanted; he was delirious from the nonstop fucking and hits to his overwhelmed insides.

Jensen licked his lips and started kissing up and down Jared's teary face.

"Gonna come, sweetheart. Think you have one more in you?" He slipped his hand down to the man's cock and started pumping the sensitive shaft in time with his thrusts. He groaned and closed his eyes, chasing his climax by fucking faster into the man.

"Unh! Hngh! Jensen, please!" he cried, toes curling in the air, back arching up as he came once more, chest heaving unevenly as he cried. His hole clenched tight around the big dick inside him and it was just too much. He didn't want to say "cut", though; he liked the feeling of such helplessness, liked the sensory overload.

Jensen groaned as the tightening of Jared's hole pushed the orgasm from him.

"Fuck baby... So fucking good." He pressed his lips to Jared's as he slowed down his thrusts. Once he was completely spent, he pulled out slowly let Jared's legs lower to the bed. Jared kissed back and sighed with relief when the other pulled out. The actor pulled back and licked his lips and stared down at the man, panting to regain his breath.

"That was amazing," Jared laughed, body feeling like jello. He never thought sex with Jensen Ackles would be _that_ intense. "Fuck, I just had sex with my celebrity crush," he said quietly, realization hitting him. "God, I'm the luckiest guy on earth."

Jensen chuckled and laid next to the other. He propped his head up so he could look down at the man.

"Was it like you imagined?" he asked with a smirk. "Or was it better?" He cupped Jared's cheek and tilted his face up so he could look into the hazel eyes. "Love those eyes. Giant puppy eyes."

"Way better," the younger male chuckled, staring lovingly up into candy apple green eyes that had taken Jared's breath away the first time he saw them in person. Jensen's eyes were more beautiful than they were in pictures. He leaned forward to kiss him gently, lazily. He ran a hand up and down his god-like chest, enjoying the time he was spending with the other man.

Jensen wrapped an arm around Jared's waist and pulled him closer to him.

"We're going to need to shower soon, Jared." Jensen grinned at the patches of come on the man's stomach. "That can't be comfortable."

Jared blushed slightly, nodding.

"Yeah. But I bet my shower is nothing compared to what you're used to," he murmured. He was slightly jealous of Jensen's wealth and looks. Despite crushing on him, he looked up to him as well. He was his goal in every way. In looks, wealth, talent, everything.

Jensen shook his head and played with Jared's long, silky hair.

"Doesn't matter what I'm used to. There was a time where I didn't have the money I have now, you know. I don't forget where I came from. A shower is a shower." He laid back, slightly worn from the round of sex. Before he forgot, he took off the condom and tied it off. He flung the rubber into the trash can across the room, making the basket. "Fuck yeah!" He held out his hand for Jared to high five.

Jared laughed hard and happy, weakly slapping the hand.

"You gonna try out for the NBA?" he teased, waggling his eyebrows. Jensen could probably get in if he tried hard enough. He got up and tugged at Jensen, wanting to shower with him. 

Jensen chuckled and followed the man.

"How is your ass feeling? Did I go too rough?"

"Hurts a little," the younger admitted, "but not too bad." Jared started up the shower, stepping in once it was warm. The shower was pretty small and didn't have much room for two grown men to be in it but Jared didn't mind the closeness. He lathered his hair and used the extra suds to wipe off the dried cum, humming a random tune.

Jensen stepped in behind Jared and started rubbing the man's thighs.

"Always happy to massage it for you," he cooed into the man's ear. Half of him was teasing and half was completely serious. He was still excited and energized; something about Jared just did that to him.

Jared chuckled lowly and turned, dotting Jensen's nose with a blob of shampoo suds before turning around again to rinse his hair out. He then grabbed the conditioner and rubbed it into his long hair. 

"Feel free to use my knock-off, cheap soap, shampoo, and conditioner," he said, wiggling his ass against the older male.

Jensen hissed and gripped Jared's hips to pull him against his crotch.

"How opposed would you be to me bending you over and fucking you right here, right now?" He pressed his lips to the back of Jared's neck. "Or are you too sensitive?" he challenged.

Jared made a surprised sound and he smirked.

"Well, you're gonna have to go get a condom because I'm not getting out," he laughed, pressing harder back against him, slotting the male's dick between his cheeks.

Jensen rolled his hips against Jared's, rubbing his cock between the perfect cheeks with a moan.

"You should really keep condoms in random places. Never know when a celebrity is gonna want to fuck you in the shower."

Jared huffed and washed the conditioner out of his hair. Without saying anything, he turned quickly and sunk to his knees, taking the man's member into his hot mouth. He looked up at him, water droplets dotting his eyelashes, bringing out the hazel.

Jensen groaned and combed the man's hair with his fingers.

"Mm, this works too. You're so pretty on your knees, baby."

Jared laughed around the cock and suckled on the crown, fingers lightly grazing the man's balls. He bobbed his head, trying to take down most of the length without coughing. His breaths came harsh from his nose and he closed his eyes, pulling back to jerk it slightly and nuzzle his face in the skin where Jensen's cock met his pelvis, breathing him in and loving every bit of it.

"God, your mouth is the best, sweetheart. Look at me so I can look at those pretty eyes while you swallow my cock," he cooed down at the man. The sight of Jared's plump, red lips stretching around his dick was one thing. The sight of Jared's lips stretched around his cock while his hazel eyes were open and tearing from the slight gagging... That was another thing entirely.

Jared looked up at him, that still shy blush on his cheeks as he engulfed the man's cock, trying to take it as deep as possible. The gagging did make him tear up but the fact that Jensen liked that only spurred him on to choke more until he had to pull back before he puked. He looked up longingly at the other man and tongued his slit, saliva running down his chin before the water washed parts of it off.

"You gonna come on my face?" he asked, holding up the cock to suck in one of his balls, rolling it around in his mouth before swallowing down the length once again.

Jensen groaned and felt his climax draw nearer as Jared pumped and sucked him.

"You're a little slut, Jared, milking my cock for cum. Want me to cover your face with my cum?" Before Jared could reply, Jensen pulled back and came over the man's face and into his open mouth.

Jared kept his eyes open, trying to get all of the cum in his mouth. His nose scrunched up at the taste but swallowed anyway, coughing after and getting up, wiping his mouth.

"Love your cock," he murmured, leaning in to kiss him gently, holding his wet body close.

Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's waist and kissed him back with a small smile. He usually didn't stay too long with his fuck buddies but he found that he didn't really want to leave Jared just yet. There was something about the man, besides his blowjob skills, that made him smile.

Jared pulled back and turned off the shower before pulling Jensen out with him. He dried off and yawned, pulling on a pair of black sweatpants before crawling into bed.

"D'ya wanna stay the night?" he asked, biting his lip unsurely.

Jensen nodded, standing in the center of the man's room.

"I'd appreciate it. Can I use a pair of boxers or something? Didn't bring clothes with me," he chuckled. "Unless you wanna sleep naked with me. But you look comfy."

The blush returned to Jared's cheeks and he nodded, getting up to rummage through his drawer for a pair, throwing them to the other man.

"What time do you need to go in tomorrow? I'll set an alarm so we can get up early enough," he said, unlocking his phone.

"Ten," Jensen said with a small smile. He pulled Jared's boxers on and got into bed, opening his arms for the man. "C'mere. Contrary to popular belief, I like to cuddle sometimes."

Jared laughed, turning on an alarm for 8:30 AM and switched off the cheap Ikea lamp next to his bed before scooting over to the other man. He draped an arm over his side, the other above him on the pillow, gently playing with his hair.

"I can't believe that I'm cuddling with my favorite person on earth," he said, voice quiet as he felt fatigue cover him with its sweet embrace.

The corner of Jensen's lips quirked in a half smile.

"G'night, Jared." He kissed the man's forehead and followed him into slumber.

\---------

A few peaceful days passed and it became Sunday. Jared had the day off and Jensen didn't need to film that day. They woke up in Jared's bed, Jensen staying the night there just as he did for the past few days.

"So," the actor murmured as he combed his fingers through Jared's hair. "Are we going to the pet shelter today?" He looked down at the half sleeping man, admiring how amusing he looked with his dazed out face.

"Mhm," he hummed, goosebumps traveling over his arms at the attention to his hair. "Are you allergic to cats or dogs or anything?" he asked, curling in closer, burying his face in the crook of the other's neck, placing gentle kisses.

Jensen hummed in appreciation and shook his head.

"Perfectly healthy." He closed his eyes and basked in the praise Jared was giving to his neck. He was glad the man wasn't trying to give him hickies, the makeup artist already teased Jensen enough about the angry red scratch marks on his back. 

_"I won't even need to make fake scars on you!"_

"What time do you usually go to the shelter?"

"Around 11," Jared said and pulled back only to check the time. 8:42. "We still have time," he said and cuddled back again. "Do you wanna get breakfast?" he asked, tilting his head up to look up at Jensen, smiling warmly.

Jensen nodded and rolled so he was hovering over Jared. He held himself up with his arms, his bare chest muscles flexing from the movement.

"Let's go get something to eat, pretty boy." He leaned down to press his lips to Jared's. "Had to do that first," he murmured against the man's lips.

Jared let his eyes wander over the vast expanse of muscle before he was kissed, and when he was, he kissed back tenderly, heart speeding up with how _right_ it felt. 

"I'm glad you did," he responded and shifted out from underneath the male to get dressed. 

\---------

They arrived at a little breakfast and lunch restaurant, the aroma of food making Jared salivate like he hadn't eaten in days.

"I'm probably gonna get their pancakes. My... My ex used to take me here all the time," he mumbled, looking down at the menu.

Jensen raised an eyebrow and looked at the menu as well. He was currently sporting glasses and a hat, different ones than the ones he met Jared in.

"Your ex. Was he nice to you?"

"Near the end, no. We were real gross lovebirds at first and I guess that was a front on his end, y'know? One minute, he'd be the nicest guy I'd ever met, next minute, he'd..." Jared trailed off, shame coating his features and deadening his eyes. The waitress came right on cue and Jared smiled weakly at her.

"May I get the chocolate chip pancakes and milk, please?" he asked and she nodded.

"Of course, hon. What about for you?" she asked Jensen, unknowing of who he really was. 

Jensen turned to the waitress and smiled.

"Blueberry pancakes and orange juice, please." When the waitress wrote up the order she smiled at the two of them.

"I'll be back with your drinks in a few minutes," she said before leaving them alone. 

Jensen turned back to Jared and his eyes zeroed in on his face.

"What did he do to you Jared?" he asked gently, trying to make his question not sounds too urgent.

"Nothin'," Jared said defeatedly; he hadn't talked about his ex since their break up. He had no idea why he was telling Jensen about it only a week after they met. "He's gone, I don't need to worry about him anymore," he murmured and gratefully took a sip of milk when the waitress brought it out. "That's why I'm stuck with paying full rent for that shit apartment," he said bitterly. The new memories were laying atop the stained, old ones, the images still fresh even though their break up happened two years ago.

Jensen frowned and put his hand over Jared's.

"Hey. I'm sorry. Why don't you move to a different apartment? Find something smaller and better for your budget. I could help you look," he offered with a soft smile. He felt bad for the man and wanted to help any way he could. He would've even offered to help pay for Jared's apartment, but he didn't think Jared would take hand outs from him.

"I can't, I'm stuck in a three year lease. It's not over until March first," he said sadly, twirling his fork in his hand awkwardly. "It would be nice to have a partner in choosing a new place, though," he mumbled thoughtfully but his attention was snagged by the smell of his pancakes. The waitress put them down and he dug in eagerly.

Jensen thanked the woman and stared at Jared for a moment. A crazy idea appeared in his mind but he wasn't sure how Jared would feel about it. He supposed it would be cheaper than the hotel... And he would be helping a friend...

Jensen started eating his pancakes, making a face of appreciation before looking at Jared.

"You ever think about finding another roommate?" he asked after he washed the pancakes down with orange juice.

"I tried before and everyone I interviewed was just... Not good. Too uptight, or too lazy. I just gave up after a while," he said and shrugged. "Good idea, though," he mentioned and shoveled more pancakes into his mouth with a pleased little moan; almost identical to the pleasured moans of when he was being sucked off. Jared could appreciate good food as much as great sex. 

Jensen's eyes darkened and he found himself growing hungry for something else.

"Keep moaning like that and I'll give you something to moan about," he muttered to the man across from him. He looked around to make sure no one heard him. To his embarrassment, an old lady was staring at the two of them in absolute horror of what she heard.

"Well, don't listen on other people's conversations," Jensen grumbled before looking back to Jared. "So, about the roommate thing."

Jared's fork hovered between his plate and mouth, cheeks turning bright pink. He curled up on himself at the attention Jensen drew and he flicked his hazel eyes up.

"What about it?" he asked, putting the pancake piece in his mouth.

"Well, I'm going to be filming for at least five more months. I think we're actually scheduled to finish around the end of February. Staying in a hotel for five months can be pricey. So, do you know anyone who might be looking for a roommate for a little while?" He ate a piece of his pancakes, waiting for Jared's reaction.

Jared nearly choked on his milk and had to dab at his mouth with the napkin.

"Y-You want to move in with me?" he asked, eyes saucers. He had never thought Jensen Ackles of all people would be asking him if he needed a roommate. "Are you sure? It's really cramped and it's not as nice as your hotel is, I bet. You might get very disappointed after a while," he warned.

Jensen shrugged and crossed his arms.

"I honestly don't need that much, Jared. And I won't need to buy a new bed for myself." He tilted his sunglasses down so Jared could see the sly wink he gave him. "I could help you out with the rent. How does that sound?"

"That... Sounds awesome," he said, grinning impossibly wide, the dimples deep set into his cheeks. "Thank you," he said and reached across the table to brush his fingers across the back of Jensen's hand. He let it rest there as he continued eating his pancakes, a content smile plastered on his face the entire time.

Jensen grinned and picked at his pancakes. They were amazing but he couldn't really eat with only one hand.

"You're welcome, Jared," he murmured before pulling his hand away to continue eating. The last thing he wanted to have was a bunch of paparazzi storming in and taking pictures of him holding hands with another man.

Jared felt his heart drop and he put his unused hand in his lap, frowning slightly as he ate his pancakes. They went through the rest of their meal in silence and Jensen paid before they walked out to the car to go to the shelter.

\---------

Dogs barked and howled once Jared and Jensen made their way to the back where the kennels were.

"They'll love you. Just try to be relaxed. They don't like stress," the younger male said and grabbed a bag of food to take it to each kennel and fill the bowls.

Jensen nodded and followed Jared, looking at all of the barking dogs.

"I'm a dog person, love them. And I'm always relaxed." He grinned and looked back at Jared. "Need help?" He rested his hand on the small of Jared's back as the man bent over to fill the dog bowls.

Jared bit at his lips and nodded.

"Yeah, could you fill up their water? There's water bottles in the fridge over there," he said without looking up but when he did, he flashed Jensen a grin before moving on to the next set of crates. Once they were all done with the cats and dogs, Jared led Jensen to the back of the shelter. That's where they held some of the older dogs. "This is Harley," he said as he sat down in front of the dog's crate and opened it. The dog sprung out and almost knocked Jared over but he held still and pet him as he was licked all over.

Jensen smiled and crouched down next to Jared and the excited Merle. It was cute to watch the man interact with the dog; he seemed genuinely happy to be surrounded by animals.

"I'm guessing he's your favorite?" the actor mused as he combed his fingers through the multicolored fur on the dog's back.

"Mhm! He's the one I want to adopt but I don't have the money to take care of a dog," he said sadly and the dog sat between his legs, resting his head on Jared's shoulder like he knew. Jared scratched behind the dog's ears and sighed. "He's set to be put down in a month," he mumbled.

Jensen frowned and sat next to Jared.

"How could anyone not want to adopt this handsome guy?" He ruffled Harley's fur which resulted in his face getting coated with licks from the affectionate dog. He moved his face away so he could speak without getting tongued by the dog. "How old is he? He has the energy of a puppy," he chuckled.

Jared laughed at the dog's behavior and grinned at Jensen.

"He's six. People want puppies. They'd rather have the dog for twelve years than just six or something," he explained. "I wish I could save him somehow..." he said, smile gone, replaced with teary eyes.

Jensen looked over at Jared and his big, teary, hazel eyes. Usually Jared's teary eyes made Jensen excited but this time it encouraged him to do something. It gave him a crazy idea that he knew would bring a huge smile to Jared's face. 

Jensen just hoped he liked surprises.

He cupped Jared's face and wiped the tears away with his thumbs.

"He's going to be okay. I promise. No one is being put down," he whispered soothingly.

Jared nodded, didn't want to argue the fact that Jensen was wrong. Harley curled up between them and gave a little sigh. He had come to love the dog and he would hate to volunteer at the shelter and not see the beautiful Merle. 

"Love you, Harley," he said sadly. "So you're moving in today or?" Jared asked after a minute of silence, petting the dog's soft coat.

Jensen nodded and kissed the man's forehead.

"I don't have much with me. Most of my things are in my tailer. I just have clothes and a few necessities. We can drop by my hotel room later today." He stroked Harley's hair and for a moment he imagined what it would look like when Harley lived in the apartment with them. They would look like an actual gay couple that had their lives planned out. 

Jensen held back a grimace at the thought. They weren't a couple, right? They were just fooling around, having a fling and temporarily living together to save money. And as a sign of gratitude, Jensen would get Harley for Jared. Nothing permanent about that.

"Alright," Jared said. They stayed there for another couple hours, Jared introducing Jensen to the other animals of the shelter that he had become acquainted with. They left to go back to Jensen's hotel and Jared parked and waited until Jensen was back in the car. 

"Do we have to go to set as well to get stuff from your trailer or no?" he asked.

Jensen shook his head.

"I can keep the stuff there and just bring my clothes to your place." He stared intently at Jared, reaching up to stroke his cheek. "You okay?" The man had been on the downside ever since he left the shelter earlier in the day. "You wanna order food tonight and just stay in bed?" Jensen offered. When they laid down, it was usually Jared's head laying on Jensen's chest as Jensen played with the man's long hair. It was nice.

"Yeah," Jared murmured and began driving them back to his--their--apartment. "It costs about $900 a month, and I'm able to pay it all if I'm not looking forward to eating too much," he laughed bitterly. "Did you want to go half and half or should I pay like 75 percent or something?" he asked, running an anxious hand through his hair. "What food did you wanna get?" he also asked.

Jensen put a hand on Jared's shoulder.

"Relax. I'm staying here so I'll pay half. I'll get the groceries, too. No questions or protests. I want to." He gave Jared a stern look that told the man not to argue as they walked into the house, setting Jensen's stuff that they got previously on the floor in the bedroom. "Any rules you want to give me, roomie? Like no drugs or wild parties?" Jensen chuckled and sat down on the bed, opening his arms for the man to sit on his lap.

Jared shook his head but then laughed.

"No drugs? I have like six grams of weed in my nightstand. I'd be breaking my own rules," Jared laughed. "Uh... Just... Try to keep everything tidy that you mess up--not th-that you'd mess something up, I just, I mean..." Jared couldn't believe that he was still able to get flustered after the two had fucked.

Jensen chuckled and pulled Jared down into his lap.

"You'll come to find I'm a very tidy person," he murmured before pressing his lips to the hollow of the man's neck. "Any other rules?"

"Mmm," Jared hummed, tilted his head back to give the man more access to his neck. "Don't care if you leave the toilet seat up," he said, hands resting on Jensen's shoulders. "If you see a bug, just trap it and take it outside. Unless it's a mosquito. Fuck mosquitos," he growled then laughed at his own foolishness. "Last rule is to kiss me whenever possible," he cooed before leaning down to kiss the older man gently.

Jensen chuckled against the man's lips.

"I think I'll be able to follow those rules." He let his lips ghost over Jared's again. "Might have to go over that last one again though," he finished with a lazy grin.

"Mmm, go over it as many times as you need," Jared purred and pulled back only to lay his head on the shoulder of his crush. "I'm gonna miss you when you're gone. Probably gonna forget about me," he whispered, wrapping his arms around his neck with a tiny sigh.

Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's waist and rubbed the man's side.

"How could I forget these eyes?" He looked down and turned Jared's face towards him, smiling. "It'll be hard to forget about you, Jared. Even if I wanted to try."

"Wish I could go with you," the younger male whined and buried his face into his neck, peppering possessive kisses along the soft skin there. "Don't wanna go on Facebook and see that you're married to some girl in the future," he laughed pathetically. "That sounds like I don't want you to be happy and that's so not it," he defended, keeping his blushing face turned into the crook of Jensen's neck. "Just wish I could be with you."

Jensen shifted a little, uncomfortable with the talk of the future. They were drifting into the part of a fling where they were supposed to talk about things lasting longer than they were actually going to. 

Instead of replying, Jensen pulled Jared's head up again and captured him in a kiss. It was intense and could seem loving, but Jensen just wanted to take Jared's attention away from the future talk. It wasn't that he didn't care about Jared, it was just that he didn't think he could be with Jared _forever_.

Jared was surprised with the sudden kiss but quickly melted into it. He tangled his fingers into the male's hair as he kissed, goosebumps crawling over the surface of his tanned skin. His lips had started to heal as well, his lip biting becoming less and less of a habit the more time he spent with Jensen. The boy's stomach growled loudly and he chuckled into the kiss.

"Chinese or pizza?"

"I was hungry for something else," Jensen growled into the kiss. His hands slid to cup Jared's ass. "But I can wait." His lips trailed down from Jared's lips to his neck. "Pizza sounds okay," he said before nipping at the skin of Jared's neck.

"Nngh, Jen, you're gonna kill me," he laughed weakly and felt himself twitch in his jeans. "I... I can wait," he murmured, licking his lips. "You fucking me is _way_ better than pizza." Jared began grinding down on top of the celebrity like a teenager, loving the neck kisses. "God, love it when you kiss me there," he whispered, feeling his dick begin to harden even more.

Jensen smirked against the man's neck and turned them so Jensen was over Jared, loving the sight of the other looking so debauched and excited.

"Thought you'd like the idea. Can't wait to get that tight ass around my cock." He ran his hands down Jared's sides to his pants, unbuttoning them and pulling them off the man. "Get on your hands and knees," he demanded once he pulled back from the man's neck.

"Jeez, pushy," Jared grunted and did it anyway, wiggling his bum seductively. "You gonna fuck me nice and hard?" he cooed, looking back at him. He felt weird that since he brought up dating Jensen, he totally turned it around. "You sure your new boo wouldn't mind?" he asked, referring to the waitress he had had the one night stand with.

Jensen growled and put his lips by the man's ear.

"I'm going to fuck you so hard that you won't be able to talk so much. Gonna make you come just like I did the first time." He grabbed the man's hips and kept them still so he could press his hard cock trapped in jeans against Jared's ass. "I'll fuck you enough so you won't be able to talk without your throat aching from screaming," he promised with a hiss.

"G-God, are you gonna get lube at least?" Jared squeaked, wiggling forward slightly to get away from the possible pain. "Would love you to fuck me until I can't talk, b-but I would love it more if you would use lube. Don't even need a condom, fuck it, I trust you enough," he said quietly.

Jensen pressed his lips just below Jared's ear.

"Of course I'm gonna use lube. Don't wanna hurt you. Just wanna pleasure you till you cry." He pulled away to strip Jared of his boxers, revealing the pink pucker that Jensen had spent the last week fucking. "Such a nice ass, Jared. Gorgeous just like the rest of you." He spread the cheeks and trailed his tongue from Jared's perineum up to the pink pucker. This was the first time he was going down on Jared and he wanted to make the experience memorable for the man.

"Oh! Fuck! What're you doin'?" the younger male whimpered, surprised. He had never been rimmed before, only saw it in porn, and he felt like he was floating to heaven. "Fuck, more of that, please," Jared huffed, pushing his ass back against the tongue trying to invade his tight hole. He had only been with two men before Jensen and neither cared enough for foreplay. The first had been in a closet at a senior party and the second had been his ex boyfriend who took without caring if Jared felt good or not.

Jensen held Jared's hips still and flicked his tongue over the quivering hole. He loved the sounds he could pull from Jared and wanted to drive Jared absolutely crazy with lust. He was a giver in bed, becoming famous didn't blow his ego enough to stop him from loving the act of performing oral on his partners. Sure, it was easier to eat a chick out, but he enjoyed giving rim jobs, too. Jared was by far his favorite to do it to.

Jared mewled out loudly, his body vibrating with ecstasy. He reached between his legs to begin tugging his leaking dick, precome coating the shaft.

"Jen... Jen... Jen," he panted. "I need you in me, please..." Jared felt better than he had in a long time.

Jensen moaned against Jared's opening and pulled away so he could grab the lube from Jared's bedside table.

"Gonna make you come before I get my dick inside you. Bet you'd like that, wouldn't you? Do you remember the safe word?" He rubbed lube over his fingers and slid one inside, immediately searching for the man's prostate.

"Uh-huh, it's "cut"," Jared responded, pulling away and rolling over onto his back. "Wanna look at you when you fuck me," he purred, and to be even more seductive, he lifted his legs and gently slipped his middle finger inside of himself alongside Jensen's when he put it back inside him, groaning as he crooked it just right.

Jensen smirked down at the man and unbuttoned his jeans, shoving them down to reveal his hardness. The pink tip was dripping with precome, the anticipation of fucking Jared enough to make him mad with lust.

"You look like such a little slut right now, you know that? Needing both our fingers right after I just had my tongue in it. Can't go long without something thick inside that greedy hole, can you?" he said as he coated his cock with lube.

"N-No," he whimpered, "can't go long without you in me. Need your cock all the time. Want your cum in me this time," he rambled, free hand trailing up his chest to roll his peaked nipple in between his index and thumb, tugging at the hardened nipple. "Please, hurry, God, need more," he spewed, shoving a second finger inside himself.

Jensen pulled Jared's fingers and his own one out and lifted the man's legs up and over his shoulders. He leaned down to give the sweet hole one last lick, holding the man's hips there so he could thrust his tongue inside the hole a few times, mimicking what his cock was going to do in a matter of seconds.

"J-Jen..." Jared growled, reaching down to grab the man's hair and tug upward to smash his lips against his. "If you don't fuck me right now, I will _kill you_ ," he hissed, nipping along the other male's jaw, silently threatening to give him facial marks unless he fucked him right that second.

Jensen smirked and positioned himself so the blunt tip of his cock was pressing against Jared's hole.

"I get all tingly when you take control like that," the actor laughed before slowly pushing into the man. 

It was wet from the lube, but it was mostly hot and tight in a way that made Jensen want to pound the sweet hole raw. Jared's ass was _so_ much better without a condom. He could feel everything, appreciate everything. It was better than fucking a chick without a condom. 

"Fuck, this ass is perfect. Swallows my cock up like the greedy little whore you are," he growled into Jared's ear.

"God, your whore, your whore," Jared whimpered, the stretching making his heart pound fast against his ribcage. "Your cock feels so good in me," he whispered, holding him close to his body. "Harder, please," he begged, body burning from the inside out.

Jensen stared down at Jared as he pulled out until only the tip was left, then rammed back in with a pleasured grunt. 

The pornographic sound that fell from Jared's mouth resonated with the actor, spurring him on to keep that unforgiving pace that kept pushing Jared's buttons in the right way.

"Jen! Jen, fuck, Jen," Jared was delirious with how good it felt and he had no idea why he kept babbling. "Fuck me, fuck me, _hngh_ ," he whined, healing lips parted to let out the high pitched moans that kept bubbling out of him. Jensen's fat dick just kept pounding into his sweet spot and it was driving Jared insane with firey ecstasy. "God, please, fuck." He had no idea what he was begging for but he felt his orgasm curl in his groin and he groaned, digging into the male's skin as his climax burst from him, coating his chest with white cream. "Fuck! Jensen! F- _Fuck_!" he cried, the sound so fucking broken and breathy, tears actually sliding down the sides of his face from the pleasure.

Jensen groaned at the tight pressure on his cock and continued thrusting until he felt his balls tighten, signaling his oncoming release.

"Fuck, Jared," he grunted before releasing into the tight and willing heat.

Jared groaned long and hard, absolutely loving the feeling of Jensen's cum shooting inside of him. He panted, head flopping down against the pillow. It reeked of sex but that only made Jared feel happy. Happy that he was able to be with the crush of his dreams.

"Fuck... That felt so good," he laughed breathlessly.

Jensen chuckled and pulled out once he finished.

"Should I order the pizza now? Or do you want to relax a little more?" He laid next to the man and pressed a kiss to Jared's temple. 

Jared's stomach growled loudly, answering the actor's question. He chuckled and grabbed his phone, calling the nearest pizza place and ordering food for the two.

Jared was thoroughly fucked out and was still in bed, sheets pooled around his waist when the pizza came. He groaned and begged Jensen with his eyes to get the door. Of course, his puppy eyes worked fabulously and soon, he was slowly getting out of bed, pulling on a pair of clean briefs. He didn't even care that he had dried cum on his stomach or some slipping out of his hole. All he knew was pizza with everything on it. 

"God, so good," he groaned, biting into the pizza like he had never had it before after Jensen brought it inside. 

Jensen eyed Jared with a chuckle, biting into a slice of pizza himself.

"Keep making those noises and I'll give you something else to moan about," he teased halfheartedly. He was stretched out on the couch wearing only boxers; he didn't care to answer the door with any other clothes. "This is really good pizza though," he commented.

"Right?" Jared agreed with a grin. After he swallowed down another bite, he turned on the couch, one leg underneath him as he looked at Jensen. "Did the pizza delivery person recognize you?" he asked, taking smaller bites of his food. There was some level of excitement to being in secret but a part of Jared also just wished people _knew_ about them.

Jensen shook his head.

"I put a towel over my head, pretended I was just out the shower. It worked since I was, y'know, naked." He finished his pizza and looked over at Jared. "You work tomorrow?"

Jared nodded and was slightly happy the person didn't recognize Jensen.

"Yeah, I do, but only till like, four. Gotta wake up at seven though," he groaned. "Want me to take you to set?" he asked, finishing off his slice before going over to the kitchen to get another two. Damn, he was hungry. 

Jensen watched Jared walk away and grinned up at Jared when he returned.

"Don't worry about it, Jay. I'll get myself there. I don't have to get there until 10 again. Thanks, though, sweetheart," he said with a wink.

The pet name curled warmly in Jared's stomach and he felt the blush, once again, return to his cheeks.

"Do y'think I could watch you on set sometime?" Jared asked, worrying on his bottom lip. Blood surfaced because of the torn scab but the male didn't even seem to notice as he kept biting it.

Jensen reached up to cup Jared's face.

"Release," he demanded softly as his thumb prodded at the man's captive lip. 

When the flesh was free, Jensen ran his thumb over it, wiping the blood off.

"Gotta be careful, cutie. You'll chew your lips off by this time next week if you're not careful. What will I kiss then?" He grinned and let go of Jared's face. "When's your next day off? You can come with me to the set."

Jared shyly laughed, like a damn school girl with her crush, and that just spurred on the red on his cheeks and neck.

"I have Tuesday off. Do you think your director and producers and all that will mind?" he asked, still worried. 

_What if they kick me off set? God, that'd be so embarrassing_ , Jared thought, internally groaning.

Jensen shook his head and pulled Jared into his lap, curling his arms around the man's waist as a makeshift prison.

"They won't mind. People bring their families and friends all the time." He kissed the back of Jared's neck. "So you want to come?"

His assuring words helped Jared calm some and he let his body relax against the other male. 

"Yeah! Of course," he said and hummed happily at the gentle kisses. "Your lips better not be greasy, I don't want to break out on my neck," he laughed.

"They aren't greasy, I promise," he chuckled. "Wanna watch a movie?" The actor rested his chin on Jared's shoulder and looked at the man expectantly. 

Minutes later, they were spooning together in Jared's bed as they watched whatever movie was available on HBO that night. Jensen spent most of his time absentmindedly stroking Jared's sides and burying his face into the man's hair.

Jared hummed contently; his stomach was full and he was cuddling with his celebrity crush. It was... Perfect. Soon, Jared found himself lulled into a soft slumber, curling his body against the other man's almost possessively, draping an arm and long leg around Jensen.

Jensen fell asleep holding Jared in a much more intimate position than he planned. He was uncomfortable with the thought but the feeling of it, the closeness... It felt nice. He liked holding and cuddling with one person more than once. 

The next morning Jensen woke up when Jared tried to escape from his arms.

"Where d'you think you're going?" the actor grumbled and pulled the man back to his chest.

"Gotta get ready," Jared whined, voice rough with sleep. "I have to be there in like, an hour," he said, continuously trying to pry himself from the strong grasp of the actor in his bed. "C'mon, lemme _go_ ," he laughed, leaning forward to playfully bite at Jensen's jaw.

Jensen growled under his breath and opened his sleepy green eyes.

"Doing that will give you the exact _opposite_ of what you want." He pressed his lips to Jared's skin. "Do you really have to go? You're so comfortable." He buried his face into the barista's neck and sighed.

"You want me to be able to pay for my half of the rent?" he asked, but kept still. God, Jensen had such a hook through his heart. Jared was so susceptible to Jensen's actions and commands. It was annoying but amazing at the same time.

Jensen was immensely comfortable and almost said "fuck it, I'll pay" just so he could stay comfortable. However, he remembered what he was going to do today and relented.

"Fine. I want a coffee when you come back though," he grunted as he released the man.

"Alright, I'll get you one," Jared chuckled and got out of the loosened grip to shower and get ready.

\---------

The day was so uneventful and Jared couldn't wait to go home. He made the coffee Jensen wanted and put money in the register to pay for it and left. When he returned home, he was jumped on by a sweet Merle dog. 

"Harley?! How did you get here?" he asked the air. "Jensen? You home?" he called out.

Jensen whistled for Harley and squeezed his new squeak toy. At the sharp noise, Harley jumped off and raced to Jensen, his eyes now on the purple squeaking bone.

"Oh, hey, Jared, didn't think you'd be here that fast," the man commented as he threw the bone, the Merle taking off after it in excitement. "I was feeling lonely so I got a friend. Hope you don't mind. I got his shots and stuff so you don't have to worry. I'll take care of his food as well." He grinned up at Jared from his spot on the carpet. "Is that okay?"

Jared was in shock, mouth hanging open. 

"Jensen..." he said quietly, then a grin spread over his features, dimples as deep as can be. "Jensen... Th-Thank you!" he cried and put down the coffee he bought for Jensen and ran over to the dog, squatting on the floor to hug the furry animal. He didn't even realize he was crying until the fur he was burying his face in was wet.

Jensen watched with a wide smile as the fluffy dog licked Jared's tears away. His chest filled with a foreign warmth that he hadn't ever felt before. He liked it. Liked Jared, his situation. He was becoming too fond of the man too fast but he didn't want to stop.

"I didn't have to shoot today so I went to the shelter to get him as soon as you left for work. He was really excited to come here."

"Really?" Jared said shakily and sniffed, chin wrinkled from his crying. "God, thank you, Jensen," he cried, laying his forehead on the silk fur.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The dream Jared had in the beginning is a reference to a different J2 fanfic. I'll try to find the link to add it here. :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Self harm and semi non-con tw  
> Bottom!Jensen once but it's very important to the story.

When Jared stood, Jensen captured the other in a kiss, slow like he had all the time in the world. He knew now was not the time to turn the kiss into one of lust. It was emotional and sweet, the type of kiss that Jensen faked on screen for years and was now experiencing a sincere one. 

His arms circled around Jared's waist and he held the man close to him, imagining what it would be like to have this every day. 

The kiss was interrupted, though, by Harley pressing his head against his new owners' legs. He whined up at them, a tennis ball in his open mouth.

Jared grunted when their kiss was interrupted but he grinned anyway, happy that the interruption was caused by Harley.

"You wanna play, boy?" Jared said excitedly, grabbing the tennis ball and gently throwing it into the other room, the dog happily chasing it and bringing it back. Jared threw it again before turning his smile towards Jensen. 

"You know this means a lot to me, right?"

Jensen grinned and sat on the couch to watch Jared play with the dog.

"Yeah, I know. I couldn't see you so upset like you were yesterday. I can see how much he means to you." Jensen looked over at Harley and smiled. "Plus, his puppy eyes are better than yours. How could I stand a chance against those?"

Jared fake gasped and put a hand to his chest. 

"Better than _mine_ How rude!" He fake frowned then couldn't help but laugh. He straddled the man's waist and scraped gently down his chest. "He can't compete with me in bed, though," he said and waggled his eyebrows.

Jensen chuckled and rested his hands on the man's waist.

"You have him there. You're on a different level than anyone else I've been with." He pecked the man's lips and grinned. "How was work?"

Jensen's remark made Jared's heart thump wildly in his chest. Different level than anyone else he had been with... That just made Jared happier.

"It was okay. Remember that douchefuck who yelled at me when you came in that first or second time? Well, he came back but he was so quiet about his order," Jared recalled, grinning. "You really scared the shit out of him."

Jensen smirked and pushed his chest out proudly.

"Good. He was a shit head for making you feel like that." Jensen looked down at Harley, who had sat down by his feet and was looking back and forth between his new owners. "Someone looks hungry, huh?" Jensen murmured to his lover with a smile. "Wanna feed him? I got the same food that they gave him at the shelter." Sure, maybe he went a little overboard buying stuff for Harley, but both the dog and Jared were excited and happy about the new developments. It was sweet to watch and it felt even better to know that he made them that happy.

"Yeah, sure!" Jared said and hopped up happily, searching around the house until he found where Jensen had stored the dog food and took it over to where the two bowls were. One had water already in it, the other empty. He poured the food into the shiny metal bowl and beamed as Harley ate it, tail wagging. Jared put the food away and leaned against the counter with a smile. "Jensen, I dunno if I could ever repay you for this," he said quietly, the only other sound in the apartment the munching of dog food.

Jensen stood up from the couch and walked over to where Jared was.

"You alright? Awfully quiet." He didn't hear Jared's comment but he did see that the man was murmuring to himself. He looked down at the hungry dog and grinned as it inhaled the food. "I got a leash for him, too." Jensen grabbed the leash and another strap of leather that he hid behind his back. "Close your eyes."

Jared was astounded by Jensen's generosity and he closed his eyes, excitement bubbling in his stomach. 

"What is it?" he asked, biting at his lip once again. He bounced anxiously in his spot, eyelids fluttering from not wanting to stay closed.

"Hold out your hand." When Jared stuck his hand out, Jensen placed the collar in the man's hand. 

It was black and made of fine leather. A shiny gold tag shaped like a bone hung from it and had 'Harley Padalecki' engraved on it in script letters along with Jared's name, address, and phone number.

It was the final step that showed Jared that Harley was indeed his in every sense of the word. He never had to worry about the dog being put down again.

Jared opened his eyes and they immediately teared up again. He ran his fingers over the soft leather and gently took the tag in his fingers to read it, his tears betraying him and falling down his cheeks.

"It's perfect. Thank you, Jensen," he whispered and looked down at the dog who had finished eating and strapped it around his neck. It was a nice fit and it looked amazing. He took the few steps over to his roommate and crashed their lips together once again, entwining their fingers together lovingly.

Jensen smiled into the kiss and ran his thumbs along the back of Jared's hands. He pulled away to press his forehead to Jared's, a smile on his face.

"I oughta do more nice things if I get rewarded like this," the actor chuckled as he ghosted his lips against Jared's.

"God, you'll get rewarded for eternity for this," Jared murmured, leaning down to kiss lovingly at Jensen's neck, biting playfully and happily. "Thank you," he said again and rested his head on his shoulder. "Harley thanks you, too," he laughed when he felt a nose poke at his leg.

Jensen chuckled and rubbed Jared's back.

"It's no problem, Jared. Are you hungry? We can go get something to eat," he offered. "Then again, I don't think Harley wants to be left alone right now," he added when he caught the Merle's puppy dog eyes.

"True," Jared agreed and pulled out his cellphone to call for pizza again. After he placed his order and hung up, he wrapped his arms around the Jensen's neck. "We're gonna have to exercise a lot to keep in shape if we keep eating like this... Any suggestions?" he asked seductively, barely touching his lips against Jensen's before he was picked up and carried to their bedroom, pizza forgotten.

\---------

"God, this place is huge," Jared said in awe, taking in the set's huge interior. "I could get lost here," he laughed. "What's your characters name? Jared asked, trying to keep his hands to himself. It hurt to know that he couldn't be openly touchy with Jensen, but he had to deal.

Jensen grinned and turned to Jared.

"Bond. James Bond," he recited the famous words dramatically. "When I told you I was a lawyer, that was my character's cover occupation. I use my characters' names as aliases when I'm required to give names sometimes," he explained.

Jared's jaw dropped.

"James Bond? Dude! That's a role of a lifetime, you'll be set for life!" he exclaimed, suddenly jealous. Hopefully his book would take off just like Harry Potter had. "How far are you into filming?" he asked as the two approached the man's trailor, going inside. It was more spacious than Jared would have imagined. "Wow," he breathed.

"Well, we film different scenes at different times. All the scenes are out of order." Jensen looked around his trailer and nodded. "It's pretty nice. That's why I have most of my stuff here," he said with a shrug. Then a smirk came across the actor's lips. "It's soundproof, too, just so you know." He winked and sat on his couch to watch Jared look around.

"Why would it be soundproof? You fuck a lot of people in here so they made it soundproof?" Jared teased, but couldn't help feeling a tad jealous at the scenarios running through his head. "When do you have to be ready for filming?" he asked. Jensen had to be there at 10, but not necessarily to film right away. Jared walked around the trailor, tracing his fingertips along the polished wood cabinets and smooth walls. He looked around in the bedroom and bathroom--both were huge. The bathroom had a toilet, shower, sink, _and_ a separate bathtub. It was crazy how they could fit so much in it. The bedroom was equally huge, the king sized bed situated in the middle, a bookshelf to the left, and a closet. He could live there but there was just a minifridge and microwave for a kitchen, however. "How often do you sleep here?" Jared asked.

"Whenever I don't want to pay out of my ass for hotel rooms. They get costly after a few months. This is... It's cozy." Jensen stared up at the ceiling when Jared left his line of sight. "I don't have to go into makeup until 11. We just check in on time and get ready for the day." When Jensen's eyes started to droop in, he shot up to start the coffee machine."It's not your coffee, but it's pretty good if you want some," Jensen called to the man in the other room. 

"Yeah! That would be great, thank you," Jared called out as well before going over to the other male. He wrapped his arms around Jensen from behind and kissed gently at the back of his neck, humming happily. "They need any extras?" Jared joked laying his chin down on the male's shoulder, watching him make the coffee.

Jensen raised an eyebrow and looked back at Jared. 

"You want me to see if we need extras? I'll ask the director." The more he thought about it, the more excited he became. Jared could get his start now and get rid of that shitty job. He could get published and Jensen would be credited for finding him. 

But could Jared even act? 

Jensen started at the man's face as if he was searching for something.

"Do you know how to act? Any experience at all?"

Jared was surprised that Jensen took his question completely seriously; he was only half joking, but still. He pulled away from Jensen and threw his hands up in the air, face turned sour.

"Do you not trust me enough? Am I not trustworthy? God, you're always like this!" he yelled and put his head in his head, shaking it as walked a few paces away. Eyes teared up, he turned, chin wrinkled. "Do you even like me? Do you think I'm a joke?" he whimpered, breaths shaky. Then, they became shaky from laughter. "I took theater in high school, but I liked writing better," he said and went back over to Jensen, kissing him gently on the cheek.

Jensen was shocked at first but then slowly slipped into a smile.

"Damn, you're pretty good," the actor chuckled and wrapped his arms around Jared's waist. "Alright, I'll ask the director before I start." He wiped the tears from Jared's face with his thumbs. "God, you're so fuckin pretty when you cry," he murmured as he stared into the man's eyes. 

Jared's eyes were a sparkly hazel, tears causing a glassy affect on the man's eyes that made the green-blue shine through from the coffee brown. Jared really was a sight for sore eyes.

"That's so weird but so flattering," he laughed, leaning in to kiss the male sweetly. A knock at the door had him jumping back, tripping over nothing, and falling flat on his ass. "Ow, damn," he growled, slowly getting up. 

"Jensen! It's time to go to makeup," a voice called from behind the door. 

"Can I come with you?" Jared asked.

Jensen nodded and straightened out. He mentally reminded himself not to touch Jared in front of anyone and then cleared his throat.

"Be right there!" He led Jared to the door and opened it to find his personal assistant. "Hello, Frankie," he greeted before pulling Jared out from behind him. "This is my friend, Jared. He's going to shadow me on set today. When I'm rolling, keep an eye on him for me, okay?"

The assistant nodded and eyed Jared; Jensen didn't like the spark of hunger that appeared in her eyes when she looked at him. Jared belonged to _him_. 

The actor glared at the woman, something he never did when it came to his assistant.

Jared felt extremely uncomfortable with the eye-fucking Frankie was doing to him. 

"Hi," he said quickly and quietly, averting his eyes to above her head. 

"Lead the way," Jensen said through gritted teeth. He knew the way to the makeup trailer but he wanted her in front so she wouldn't make heart eyes at Jared. 

_Maybe I should tone it down a little_ , he thought with a grimace.

They all went to the makeup trailor and Jared sat awkwardly on the couch as he saw Jensen get scratches put on him. He could feel the stare of Jensen's assistant burning at his side and he looked into the mirror, trying to signal Jensen with his eyes through it.

Jensen looked over at Jared when he could, catching his assistant staring at the giant as well. His eyes narrowed in anger and possessiveness.

"Frankie, come here," he barked.

The assistant jumped and her eyes shot from Jared's body to Jensen's vibrating form. She walked over and stood next to Jensen's makeup chair.

"Yes?" 

Jensen told the makeup artist to give him a moment and then turned to Frankie.

"Do you like when guys ogle you? Does it make you feel uncomfortable?" His eyes narrowed more as he looked down at his assistant.

The woman slowly shook her head.

"I don't like it. Why?" Her eyes widened slightly as she put together why she was called over. "But I--"

Jensen held up a hand to stop her in her tracks.

"Stop staring at Jared like he's a piece of meat. He's gay. Not interested." His eyes flickered over to Jared and he realized that he was getting a little _too_ hostile. He straightened up and cleared his throat. "Sorry. Just stop staring at him like that." He turned back to the mirror and motioned for the make up artist to continue. 

Frankie was still wide eyed when Jensen turned his back to her. She was dumbfounded and didn't say anything else as she went back to where she was sitting.

"Sorry," she murmured to Jared when she passed him.

Jared felt his cheeks heat up and a warmth flood his system. He loved that Jensen stuck up for him and when he got angry over it... Damn, if that didn't make Jared feel a mass of butterflies in his stomach. He smiled small towards Jensen and when Frankie spoke to him, Jared felt his smile falter but he kept it up. 

"It's no problem," the male said lightly, clearing his throat nervously. He was just hoping she just wouldn't do it again. 

There was awkward silence after the ordeal and they were soon rushed out to the set. Jared stood in the sidelines behind the producers and directors, watching as the man of his dreams fought in a fake combat scene. His muscles flexed under the suit they put him in and a fine sheen of sweat covered his forehead from exertion. Seeing Jensen fight, even though it was fake, made Jared's cock throb in his jeans.

Jared stayed on set after they took Jensen back to wardrobe, looking around. It was astounding what set designers could do. 

Jensen came back out looking dapper as ever, but... With a girl next to him that time. The set had changed; Jared wasn't paying attention, he was doing more wandering. They were in a high-end loft. On a bed. 

"Action!" the director yelled and Jensen said a few lines Jared couldn't make out because he was too busy freaking out on the inside. 

_Acting. Just acting. Stop getting so worked up_ , Jared thought to himself. 

The pair began kissing, the scene passionate and almost... Genuine. The female lead was Jensen's ex... Maybe. Maybe they were back together and Jared was just a dirty secret. Maybe Jensen just wanted someone to fuck before he got back together with her. The scenarios flooded the male's mind and he ran back to Jensen's trailor, thankful it wasn't locked so he could freak out alone. 

When Jensen was finished with the scene, he looked at where Jared had been standing so he could judge the man's reaction. When he didn't see Jared there, a frown overtook his face.

Jensen walked up to Frankie, who was looking over a clipboard of Jensen's activities for the day.

"Have you seen Jared?" he asked the woman. All of his hostility had melted away and Frankie seemed to have forgotten the jealous rage that caused Jensen to snap at her.

"He went to your trailer. Looked sick," she replied without looking up from her clipboard.

Jensen nodded.

"Thanks," he said and Frankie gave him a wave of the hand in reply and he was off. He headed to his trailer to find the floppy haired man. 

"Jared?" Jensen called once he shut and locked the trailer door.

Jared was sitting on the couch, staring down at his phone. He closed the tabs about Jensen and his ex immediately and locked his phone. Jared sadly looked up at the celebrity and sighed. 

"Hey," Jared said quietly, running a hand through his chestnut locks. His bottom lip was bleeding and the male had to keep licking at the crimson surface. He was so anxious that he had bitten his lip raw. "How was your scene?" he asked lamely, breaths shaky with a smothered panic attack. He didn't want to think of Jessica or even Jensen; his heart pounded with sadness and his depression was practically making him dizzy.

Jensen's eyes widened at the state of the man and he rushed over to get on his knees in front of him.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He cupped the man's cheeks and gently started wiping the blood away. "Why did you run off?" He was genuinely concerned and the man's bleeding lips didn't help his worrying.

"I..." Jared didn't know what to say. Tears slipped down his heated cheeks and he pulled away, standing and walking towards the coffee maker just to put some distance in between them. He didn't make eye contact as he spoke. "Am I just a fucktoy?" he asked quietly, voice barely above a whisper. He didn't want to know the answer but it was clawing at his chest, possessing him. 

Jensen stood and turned to the other man, barely believing his ears.

"Excuse me?" He stared at Jared's back, not knowing what to say. "Where the hell did that come from?" Shock coursed through the actor's veins as he registered what Jared said to him. "Fucktoy? Why the fuck--" He started pacing, trying to make sense of Jared's logic. "Let's see." He held out his hand and started counting on his fingers. "One: I'm staying with you and paying half the rent when I could stay in my trailer for free. Two: Harley. Three: I've never brought a 'fucktoy' to the set." He turned to Jared, his eyes narrowed in blooming anger. "Where the _fuck_ did that come from?" he demanded again.

"Your fucking ex! That's where it came from!" Jared yelled, sniffling as he felt his chest rise and fall rapidly. "You kissed her like you kiss me and I-I just can't help but think you only want me as a temporary side thing! Are you even fucking serious about this? Your actions go from getting me a fucking dog serious to checking out every person the walks by! How the fuck am I supposed to deal with that?" he screeched and pushed Jensen up against the cabinet, holding him tight but gently by the neck and pinning his wrists together with one gargantuan hand. "You mean the world to me and I will not be reduced to an occasional fuck and run like my previous boyfriend put me through. You're _mine_ and I'm _yours_ ," Jared hissed and attached his bloody lips to the older male's neck, biting down hard enough to bruise. Jared had major abandonment issues and knew he was being irrational but seeing Jensen with someone other than him made his blood boil and his heart freeze as the same time. He nudged his thigh in between Jensen's legs and slowly rubbed, continuing to mark up the celebrity. 

Jensen groaned at the stimulation on his cock and shuddered in pleasure at the sudden loss of control. Heat was curling in his stomach and his senses heightened, everything taking in Jared. Then he remembered he was supposed to be pissed and shoved Jared back as hard as he could.

Jensen wiped the spit from his neck and glared.

"Hey, Jared, there's this thing called acting! I'm a fucking actor!" He checked his neck in the mirror and glared at the hickey that was starting to bloom. "If they realize that I didn't have this before..." he trailed off and looked at Jared's reflection. "You need to control yourself because this ain't gonna work out if you freak out every time I have to do my goddamn job," he hissed.

Jared glared and rolled his eyes. 

"So I'm not allowed to get jealous but you are? Even after you flirt with me then bang some waitress, you got so fuckin' defensive when your assistant was undressing me with her eyes!" Jared yelled, pushing him back and gripping the sandy blonde hair tight in his fist. "You act like you're tough shit but I bet you'd love a cock in your ass. If I belong to you, you'd better belong to me, too, bitch," Jared whispered sharply, anger and sadness and absolute arousal conflicting in his system.

Jensen hissed through his teeth at the pressure on his scalp.

"The waitress was before we started this, you little shit," he reminded with a glare. God, he was turned on by Jared's possessive streak, but he was _not_ getting fucked in his trailer where anyone could pass by and walk in. 

"Not fuckin' in my goddamn trailer, either. Not with my entire cast and crew outside the damn door," Jensen gripped Jared's hips, ready to throw him off as soon as his grip on Jensen's hair was released.

"Lock the door. It's soundproof, isn't it?" Jared purred, gripping the hair harder and scraping his teeth down the bump of Jensen's Adam's apple. "You don't know what you do to me," Jared hissed, taking his free hand and cupping the man's bulge, rubbing right on the side of too rough. 

Jensen shuddered and gripped Jared's hips.

"Go lock the damn door, you shit. Before I change my mind." He couldn't believe he was actually going to let Jared do this. Jensen _never_ bottomed. _Ever_. It wasn't really a pride thing he just never saw anyone he'd let top him. Lord knew people tried.

And then there was Jared. The exception to most of Jensen's rules.

Jared pushed away from him to practically run over to the door and lock it. He went back over to the man and tugged him by the collar of his shirt into the bedroom and threw him down on the soft bed, crawling on top of him to kiss him violently, like he'd never see him again. Teeth knocking together and tongues sliding. Jared ground down slowly against the other male, hands roaming all over Jensen's body, trying to memorize the dips and curves and ridges.

Jensen groaned from under Jared and trailed his hands over the man's back. He wanted to slip his hands into the man's pants and grip his ass, but he figured that Jared wouldn't like that since he was trying to dominate him. Instead, Jensen pulled at Jared's shirt, trying to get it off.

Jared sat up and pulled it up and off, body more muscular and fuller from the nutrients he was getting that he was lacking before. He tugged Jensen's shirt off and wiggled downward to pull his pants down along with his underwear and shoved the man's thighs up, attacking his puckered hole with his tongue.

Jensen's hips buckled and a strangled moan escaped his throat at the sudden stimulation.

"Fuck, Jared," he hissed and reached down to grip the man's hair. Now he saw why Jared writhed like a whiny whore when Jensen went down on him. Everything was so fucking sensitive. Every flick of the other's tongue sent shockwaves through his body.

Jared chuckled low in his throat, eating out the celebrity like it was his air. He reached a hand up and began jerking the man's leaking cock, his own dripping in his underwear. The noises Jensen was making were like a sweet symphony to Jared. He removed his hand from the male's dick and pried Jensen's hand off of his head. 

"You have lube? Condoms?" Jared panted, licking his lips, savoring the musky taste of Jensen. He didn't like the idea of Jensen fucking other people in his trailor but he couldn't care about it enough. He began undressing fully, throwing his clothes to the floor and sitting back, jerking his own cock as he waited for the actor to get the necessary supplies.

Jensen gathered his head and leaned over to grab the items from the drawer next to the bed. He was panting heavily, his body sensitive and receptive to all of Jared's touches. He wanted more, but one look at Jared's dick had his ass clenching with second thoughts. He knew Jared was hung, but he never considered _bottoming_ for the man.

Jared snatched the things from him excitedly and poured some of the lube on his fingers and pushed one in, immediately trying to find that sweet spot inside Jensen. 

"God, you're so fuckin' tight," Jared growled, putting in a second finger enthusiastically. He scissored them and wiggled them inside the tight heat for a minute before pulling them out. He rolled the condom on, dick pulsating and more than ready to shove into Jensen's ass. He generously applied lube to his member and scooted forward, pressing the curved head to the other man's hole. Jared sunk in slowly but a little too quickly, relishing in the velvet warmth. The younger almost came right then and there but held still, trying to hold it back. He pushed forward even more until he was bottomed out and groaned. Jared pulled out halfway then fucked into Jensen again. The tightness off the actor was incredible and it soon had Jared pounding into it, veins on his arms popping as he held himself up above Jensen.

Jensen squirmed under the man, trying to find some comfort or pleasure from the intrusions of Jared's fingers. He was barely stretched when Jared shoved in, his breath leaving him with a painful 'unf.'

"Jared!" The man must've taken that as a groan of pleasure because he began railing into him like a goddamn dog.

"STOP!"

Jared stopped immediately, cock halfway in. 

"What? You change your mind, big boy?" he panted with a chuckle, flipping his sweaty hair out of his face. He took Jensen's limp dick in his hand... Wait. Why was it soft? He gave it a few pumps, eyebrows drawn together to try to get it hard.

Jensen hissed and slapped Jared's hand away.

"Is this your first time fucking someone?" His ass was aching around Jared and Jensen actually worried that he wouldn't be able to walk right after. His face was scrunched up in pain, the inside of his cheek bleeding from biting down to keep from screaming.

Jared sat back and pulled out, slightly offended. 

"Yeah. It is. Is this your first time bottoming?" he said with a slight sneer and roll of his eyes. "Am I not good enough for Mr. Superstar or something?" he teased, cock drooping with annoyance at the situation. Jensen's face made his gut wrench slightly and he was hoping to God the pain in his face was from sort of stomach ache and not caused by Jared. 

Jensen grimaced as the man pulled out and he leaned up on his elbows to glare at the man.

"It is. And since you always bottom you should know how fucking _important_ prep is and how you shouldn't fucking rush it!" He was furious that Jared took his pain as a joke and if he had the ability to get up and throw his ass out he would. "It feels like I sat on a goddamn softball bat without lube."

"I was hoping you'd say something else," Jared whispered and leaned forward to press a gentle kiss to the hurt man's abdomen. "I'm so sorry," he said and looked up at Jensen. "I just g-got so excited and I... God, I practically raped you," Jared groaned, and ran his hands gently through the actor's hair. "I'm so, so sorry... Let me make it up to you." 

Jared scooted over so he wasn't in between Jensen's legs and bent down to kiss the older male passionately but slow, scabbed lips trying to kiss him as gently as possible. He ran a hand down Jensen's chest and gently massaged one of his nipples in between his index finger and thumb. 

"I'm so sorry..." he mumbled against soft lips and traced his fingers over the other hardened bud. 

Jensen was still hurt both physically and emotionally, so his kisses weren't as responsive as they usually were. He couldn't get back into the mood and pushed Jared's hands away.

"I can't right now." Jensen pulled himself up, wincing at the sharp pain that throbbed in his ass.

 _Never bottoming again_ , he thought bitterly.

"Jen.." Jared whined and felt his heart shatter. "I won't touch you there, promise... Can... Can I at least give you a massage?" he asked. "On the back. I won't touch you anywhere near your ass except for the bottom part of your back. Please, let me make you feel better or at least try..." Jared felt horrible for what he had done and knew Jensen probably felt worse. "A-And I'll get you some sort of cream for your ass and I just... I didn't mean to hurt you..."

Jensen stared at Jared, his jaw clenched in anger. The man looked like he was about to cry and part of Jensen felt he deserved it. 

But the other part of Jensen, the one he didn't recognize, felt bad for the man. He didn't know. It wasn't like he would purposely hurt Jensen. Jared looked so hurt and so sorry...

"Fine. Just keep away from my ass," he grumbled before slowly--and painfully--turning over so Jared could reach his back.

Jared nodded and sat still by his side until he was fully situated. He hesitantly put gentle hands on Jensen's shoulders, squeezing and kneading the freckled flesh.

"I really care about you," he admitted after a few minutes of silence, moving the heels of his palms down the tense back of the actor. "Honestly. I really didn't mean to hurt you. I got carried away and... Just know it won't happen ever again as long as..." he took in a shaky breath, "as long as you want me. A-And I won't hurt you after you don't want me, either," he clarified, just in case. He worked his way back up to the shoulders and removed his hands only to gently kiss the back of Jensen's head before beginning again.

Jensen closed his eyes and tried his best to relax under the ministrations.

"I know you won't hurt me. You took control because I _let_ you take control," Jensen grumbled. He knew he was acting childish but his pride and ass both hurt and he needed to take it out on someone. "I could kick your ass." Not that he would, though. He knew it was an accident and knew that Jared was beating himself up. He didn't need the additional guilt. "I'm sorry, I'm being a dick," he murmured into the silence.

"I'd let you punch me," Jared answered honestly. "I deserve it. Hell, punch me two, three times and I'd still lov--" 

"Jensen! Back to set!" Frankie called from the door. Jared sat back and sighed. 

"Sorry for giving you the hickey and pretty much raping you," Jared mumbled, hurrying to put his clothes back on.

Jensen slowly got up and winced as a pain ran down his back.

"Grab me the Aleve in my bathroom. Medicine cabinet," he demanded as he began pulling on his clothes. 

He stood up and straightened out the best he could without feeing that sharp pain. When he managed to find a decent angle, he went over to his personal makeup table to get concealer.

Jared rushed over to the bathroom and got the medicine for Jensen, and getting a water bottle from his minifridge. 

"Jen... Again, I'm so sorry," Jared whispered and watched him put on concealer. It was oddly covering it but it worked. Jensen must have picked a few things up from his makeup artist. "If you don't wanna live with me anymore, I get it, you don't have to stay o-or come to the shop again or anything," he murmured, ripping at his lip once again.

Jensen looked at Jared in the mirror and turned to face the man.

"Stop it." He cupped the man's face and gently pulled Jared's lip from his teeth. "I know it was an accident." The actor gently pressed his lips to Jared's, not a kiss that showed he was okay, but one that showed Jared he was forgiven. "I'm not leaving."

"Alright," Jared said quietly, gulping.

"Jensen, c'mon!" Frankie yelled through the door, knocking on it incessantly and with increased urgency. 

"I'll stay here if you want," Jared offered, going to the bathroom to get toilet paper to dab his bleeding lips.

"I'll be out in a minute!" Jensen snapped at his assistant before turning to Jared. "Stay here and relax. Make yourself at home." He popped two Aleve to hopefully ease the ache in his ass. "I'll be back in a few hours," he sighed and walked out the door to an irritated Frankie and another three hours of filming.

\---------

When Jensen finished, he immediately went back to his trailer. He dodged Richard and Jessica and the multiple inquiries of how the shade of his neck looked different than usual.

 _Seriously, who the hell notices these things_ , he thought as he entered his trailer.

Jensen was glad Jared stayed behind because they filmed a particularly romantic scene between Jensen and Jessica. It wasn't Jensen's fault that there were so many romantic scenes. James Bond was known for two things: being a kickass spy and having a romance with the Bond girl. 

"Jared?" the actor called out as he closed the door to the trailer.

Jared had fallen asleep on the couch, his earlier tantrum had worn him out. 

"Huh?" he snorted awake, awkwardly sitting up on the smallish couch. "Hey... How was filming?" Jared asked with a yawn, rubbing at his tired eyes. He stretched and got a bottle of water from the minifridge for himself and drank the water quickly, absolutely thirsty for anything.

Jensen's lips quirked into a small smile at the tired man.

"It was fine. Ready to go home, sleeping beauty?" He picked up the keys and his things, ready to leave and just go to sleep after the emotionally and physically draining day. Luckily, he had the next week off to relax and let his ass heal.

Jared nodded and stretched once more before gathering his belongings and walking out of the trailor with Jensen. They were immediately bombarded with questions from Frankie _and_ the director, accusations making Jared 's cheeks heat as the two hurriedly left and went back to their apartment. 

\---------

"Are they always like that, even with your other obvious flings?" Jared asked, locking the door. "I mean, maybe it's not as obvious but still."

Jensen shook his head and eased himself down on the couch.

"This is the first time they've suspected me being with a man. This is big shit to them," he said and closed his eyes. "I don't have to deal with them for another week though," he added. The actor waited until they got home to tell Jared that they would be alone together for the next week. He couldn't find a better time to tell the man because he was too focused on the pain in his ass.

Jared just nodded and sighed, standing awkwardly by the couch.

"I'm gonna go... Uh, work on my book, okay?" Jared didn't really wait for an answer and retreated to the bedroom. First thing he did before working on his book was smoke his pot, supply dwindling. He felt awkward in the presence of Jensen; he couldn't look at the pain he caused to the man he loved. Yes, loved.

Jensen kicked off his shoes and slowly shifted so he was laying down on the small couch. He wanted to sleep before the painkillers wore off and he didn't want to fall asleep with the negativity that hovered around Jared. The couch was comfortable enough to sleep on so he just let himself doze off.

Jared got blasted high and wrote the first chapters fully, sentences all blurring together at one point. His eyes were drooping but his stomach forced him up to get food. He trudged out into the kitchen and made ramen--he actually liked it when he was high. The younger male hesitantly made his way over to Jensen and pushed his shoulder gently.

"Hey, Jensen," he said with a dramatic whisper. "Do you want curly noodles in salt sauce?" he asked the sleeping man.

Jensen cracked his eyes open and looked up at Jared, exhaustion clear on his face.

"What do you want?" He closes his eyes again and sniffed, his face twisting in sudden irritation. "You reek of weed," he muttered before turning to bury his face into the couch pillow.

"I was wondering if you wanted Japanese noodlies," he said, turning his head to the sound of the timer beeping. "I'll make you some but you gotta say yes before I take the ramen and whatever else we have into the bedroom so I can veg out." Jared headed to the stove and took the pot off the burner to pour his ramen into the bowl. "Or is it Chinese? Is ramen Chinese or Japanese..." he muttered to himself and grabbed the unopened bag of Lays and headed to his room. 

Jensen watched his babbling idiot of a lover as he returned to their room. He shook his head and face planted back into the pillow, willing sleep to take him once more. He was almost completely asleep until the human bong walked in and prattled about ramen.

Jared ate as much as his hungry stomach could take and lazily rolled over to dig in his messy nightstand to find his razor. He hadn't cut in years but he missed it. Too much. Cannabis running its course through his system had his body relaxed and he slipped off his jeans to roll up the fabric of the boxers almost to where his thighs met his pelvis.

 _You deserve it_ , he thought to himself and gently sliced into the paler skin, humming happily as he did so. Even though weed helped ease his worries, nothing ever helped as much as his self-prescribed self-mutilation regimen. They were shallow but he soon took his lighter and lifted his leg slightly to burn at the bloodied wounds. His face scrunched up in pain but at the same time, it was like the pain was pushing out the sad. Harley jumped into the bed and whined, pawing sadly at the sheets as if to tell him to stop. Jared let out the breath he hadn't known he was holding and surveyed the damage. Wrinkly, burned skin surrounded tiny slits, all of it oozing that sweet crimson. 

"It's fine, Harley. I'll be fine," he assured the Merle. Harley only laid right by his side as if to protect him from his inner demons that wanted to come out. Jared didn't care much about preserving his health and simply grabbed a tissue to dab at the wound. Soon after it was done bleeding, he rolled his boxers back down to their normal length, crawled under the covers, and fell into a deep sleep with his worried pup by his side.

\---------

The next morning, Jensen woke up feeling even worse than the day before. He checked his phone for the time. 10:27. Jared was at work already. He was grateful that the man let him sleep in considering the ache around the rim of his ass. He really hoped there wasn't too much tearing or else it was going to be hell trying to take a shit.

The actor slowly sat up only to be pounced on by an excited and loving dog. Harley's tail was wagging a mile a minute as he stared up at one of his owners.

"You hungry, pup?" The dog barked in reply and jumped off of Jensen in favor of running to the kitchen where his food and water bowls were placed. 

Jensen stood and stretched, letting out a low whine of pain.

"Goddamn Jared and his monster dick," he hissed as he lightly limped to the kitchen to feed his dog.

Jared also walked with an odd limp but it was from the cuts and burns he made on himself that prior night. Customers looked at him weird and so did his coworker when he came in to take the next shift. Jared was relieved when he was able to leave because he was pretty sure he was bleeding through his pants.

The minute he got home he raced to the bathroom, Harley right behind him, following him into the small room. Jared shut and locked the door and took off his pants, rolling up his boxers, and put his foot on the counter. The burns were oozing yellow and red and Jared dabbed at them with toilet paper until it was mostly clean and put large bandaids on them. Thank God he had bought some.

Jared liked his burns and cuts and he felt saddened that he felt that way but... He just couldn't care. The younger male surveyed his jeans and didn't notice anything on the outside. He kept them off anyway, just rolled down the boxers' fabric. Harley was whining, brown eyes full of concern if he could even feel concern for his new owner. Jared leaned down to pet him gently and let him out of the bathroom and followed, but threw his pants into the hamper. When he got to the living room, his cheeks bloomed to a rosy color. He hoped Jensen didn't question him.

Jensen looked up as Jared came in and his eyebrows shot up.

"What are you up to?" He eyed the man suspiciously, still wary of him and his dick. "Where are your pants?"

"They got really dirty at work," he said nonchalantly, going to the fridge and bending over to try to see what they had. He took out the necessary supplies for a sandwich and sighed. He got a knife to cut the bread and just stared at it for a few moments. "How are you feeling?" he asked quietly before he started cutting the bread and preparing his sandwich. "There's some neosporin in the medicine cabinet," he mentioned.

Jensen stood slowly and walked over to stand next to Jared.

"I'm feeling better. Dreading taking a shit though," he muttered as he watched Jared work on his sandwich. "Your pants weren't dirty when you came in." The actor crossed his arms and eyed the man's legs.

At any other time Jensen would've slipped behind Jared and bent the man over so he could fuck away the stress of the day. But now, Jensen was too hurt to move like that and he was sexually uncomfortable around the other whether he was giving or receiving. His main problem was how _mad_ he still was. He was mad at Jared, the situation, and how humiliated he felt. 

_Maybe it would be better if I just left._

"I spilled stuff on it and it dried," Jared laughed, putting down the packet of cheese. "Why don't you believe me?" he asked incredulously, eyebrow cocked upward but still unsure. "Y-You know what, I'll just put sweatpants on," the younger male sighed and went back to the lonesome bedroom. After he tugged a gray pair on, he decided to take the rolled blunt he had in his drawer and light it, smoking it throughout the apartment and back to the kitchen. Jared didn't give a fuck about getting kicked out. His life couldn't get any worse; he pretty much raped the man of his dreams.

Jared held the blunt in dark red, scabbed lips, breathing in deeply as he assembled his sandwich. Smoke blew from his nose and when the sandwich was on the plate, he turned to Jensen, blunt between his fingertips.

"You want a hit or a sandwich or both?" he asked. Harley seemed to think Jared was talking to him because he barked happily, expecting a treat. The male laughed and threw a scrap of crust at the beautiful dog and he snatched it up quickly, trotting into the other room.

Jensen took in how miserable Jared seemed to look now. The familiar rush of guilt came back when he realized it was because of him. Jensen was pushing him away. Making him feel worse. The man had anxieties off the charts and Jensen's attitude wasn't making it better.

It was a genuine accident and what they had between them was only going to die if Jensen kept holding on to his bitterness. If there was one thing he learned when he became famous, it was trying to learn how to let things go, so the actor sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"I want--to hold you," he finally answered, opening his arms for Jared.

Jared was nothing but shocked and he furrowed his brows. 

"You... Want to hold me? Even after I basically raped you...?" Jared whispered, a lump forming in his throat. He snubbed out the blunt in the sink and almost collapsed into the other man's firm body, stupidly crying from how relieved he was. "God... Thank you, Jensen..." he whimpered. "Been wanting this ever since we left your trailer. I'm so, so sorry. I know I'll never be able to undo what I did but I'm just... I'm so sorry." Jared squeezed the man tighter and Harley tried to bump his nose in between their legs out of interest but Jared paid him no mind and buried his face into Jensen's neck, careful not to kiss; he was afraid he'd ruin it.

Jensen wrapped his arms around the man and rubbed his back.

"Relax... I know you didn't mean to. It was an accident. I was just mad and hurt." He ran a hand through Jared's hair, trying to soothe the crying man. "It wasn't rape. You just didn't know what you were doing." Jensen pulled back slightly to press a kiss to Jared's forehead. "Just can't do anything extreme for a few days. Just until the ache goes away," he murmured as he wiped the man's tears.

"But... You're right... I-I bottom and I should _know_ how much care to take..." he whined, gripping Jensen's shirt as tight as he possibly could. "I should've been more careful..." he sighed. "I don't deserve you." Jared couldn't help but unload his self-hatred and for some reason, he was hoping it would make Jensen understand how sorry he was. "I'll never hurt you again, I promise..."

Jensen rubbed Jared's back and closed his eyes. 

"Yeah, I'm not going to sugar coat it. You fucked up. But shit happens, okay?" he soothed, cupping the man's face. "Stop beating yourself up because that's only going to keep us both in the past. Do you want me to be pissed at you?" He raised his eyebrow and stared questioningly into the man's teary hazel eyes.

Jared almost wanted to say yes. 

_Yes, be pissed, fucking kick me, throw me, punch me, anything to show me I deserve pain._

"No..." he said and sighed, taking one of Jensen's hands and kissing it instead of his lips. 

"Then stop beating yourself up," the actor murmured before gently kissing the man before him. He kept the kiss brief but it held meaning. "Let's watch a movie or something, okay?" he suggested quietly against Jared's lips.

The rest of the apartment was only silent and empty whereas before the air was thick with choking tension. Now, the home had a sense of peace that Jensen didn't want to break with loud volumes or bitter words.

The younger male relished the kiss, not caring that it was short.

"Alright," Jared said with a nod and eyed his sandwich. "I'm gonna eat that so hard," he giggled, the effects of the blunt hitting him a little more obviously now that he was in a good headspace. He took the plate and led Jensen to the couch to pick a movie. He let the celebrity choose and ate his sandwich happily. Guilt still festered in his mind, but he pushed it back. He just felt like he needed some kind of punishment. An eye for an eye sort of thing. 

He must have dozed off during the movie because he was being carried to the shared bedroom and tucked under the covers. He could've sworn he felt a kiss to the top of his head. 

The next two days were spent healing and before Jensen knew it, the ache was completely gone. He became touchier again and stole kisses from Jared every chance he got. They didn't have sex since the incident, both too wary to bring it up to the other. The break from sex actually helped Jensen cherish the little romantic things with Jared. 

The night before, the younger came back to the apartment to a home made dinner complete with candles and flowers. It was something straight out of a movie but Jensen knew that Jared was a sucker for those kinds of things. Harley slept beneath the table as the couple dined, his nose still alert in case any stray meat fell to the ground. They finished the night off with a movie and Jensen held Jared until they both fell asleep in each other's arms. 

Today though... Today, Jared was acting strange. Jensen didn't know what had gotten into the man but he was worried and by the whines that escaped Harley, he was worried as well.

Jared was floored by the romantic atmosphere Jensen had created and absolutely soaked it in. But he soon got more jittery. Jared wished he could come out and say 'rape me, I deserve it', but he just couldn't. The laptop sitting on the coffee table had a black screen and he gnawed on his lip. He hoped Jensen had looked at it out of curiosity during the day.

"So..." he started, closing the laptop slowly. "I read that zip ties are more effective than any other restraint," he mentioned, trying to be casual. "Digs into the skin and ridiculously hard to get off."

Jensen raised an eyebrow at Jared and cleared his throat.

"Your lip, Jared. Stop it," he demanded before continuing to pet Harley's fur. He and the Merle grew incredibly close in a short amount of time and Jensen was honestly dreading the time when he would have to leave. "They're easy to break out of if you know what you're doing though. Zip ties, that is." 

Jensen definitely saw what Jared left on the coffee table but didn't give off any hint that he knew. He couldn't believe Jared wanted Jensen to... Jensen couldn't think about it. He knew it was a fantasy and the thought of acting it out sent fire rushing through his veins, but why? Did Jared really find that arousing or did he just want it in return for what he did to Jensen?

"Mmm, well, how would someone get out of handcuffs then?" Jared asked, folding his feet underneath him and laying his head down on Jensen's shoulder. "Especially if their arms are in some weird position or something," he added with a slight yawn. Work that day was incredibly stressful because all he could think about was Jensen and he kept messing up orders.

"Break your hand to pull it out. That or sneak the key," he said absentmindedly, moving Jared so he could wrap his arm around him and stroke his hair. "You look tired."

Jared huffed and rolled his eyes. He wished Jensen would've just agreed with him. 

"Yeah, long day. I was preoccupied thinking about school," he said with a shrug. "I have good grades and everything but finals are coming up so it's getting stressful."

Jensen nodded in understanding and thought for a moment.

"Why don't you take a hot shower? It might relax you a little."

 _And give me time to catch you off guard_. He didn't say the thought aloud, but he was already running through his ideas. 

Jensen was no stranger to kinks and fetishes. He had been curious and as a result, he spent a fair amount of time researching BDSM and kinks he had never heard of. He knew that submissives got off by being controlled because of the illusion that choice was taken away from them. Of course they had a say in things, but there was supposed to be a level of trust between the submissive and the dominant so that they didn't need to stop. 

Jensen could do that for Jared. Be his dominant, even for a short while. He could play out Jared's fantasy and dominate the man if that's what was going to help him relax.

"Yeah, that sounds good," Jared agreed and gently kissed Jensen on the cheek before he got up to go take the shower. After the younger male stripped and turned on the water to have it warm up, he brought the razor into his bathroom and sat on the toilet lid. With a soft sigh, he ripped into his inner thighs, even going over the healing burn. That hurt the most; it made tears fall down his cheeks but all that kept running through his head was _I deserve it_. He washed off the razor and put it back quickly so he could get in the shower, the blood lightening in color as it washed down the drain. The male began lathering his hair with shampoo and practically purred. It felt so good to massage his scalp.

Jensen waited a few minutes before going to the bathroom and slowly opening the door. He stripped as slowly and quietly as he could, watching the outline of Jared's body in the shower curtain. So far, the man didn't notice anything wrong. 

Jensen stepped into the shower just as Jared rinsed off the last bit of his shampoo. Before the taller man could blink, he was slammed against the tile wall, his belly pressed against the cold and a hand tangled in his hair.

"You're going to keep quiet, do you fucking understand me?" Jensen snarled from behind Jared. 

Jensen was playing the role of a man who craved power and pleasure. He would stop at nothing to get it. There wasn't anyone he wouldn't hurt to get it. It helped to be an actor.

"J-Jensen," Jared whimpered, his heart accelerating. He was confused until he realized what the other male was doing. "Please don't hurt me," the younger whispered, heart still beating fast but from excitement. Finally, he'd get what he deserved. "What do you want from me?"

"I told you to shut the fuck up," Jensen tightened his grip in Jared's hair and slid his cock between the slot of Jared's ass cheeks, sliding it up and down with a low and satisfied chuckle. "I'm going to make you pay for what you did." 

"You... You said you forgave me," the male squeaked, struggling slightly against the man's grip, not even remotely trying to get away but playing along. His cock was thickening, and he restrained himself from humping the tile wall. "Please, don't do this, Jensen," Jared whimpered.

"You whine like a bitch," Jensen moved his hand from Jared's hair to the man's throat, cupping it and applying light pressure to cut off the air flow. "But I know you like it. You're a slut who loves to get stuffed with cock." Jensen used his free hand to grab Jared's dick, squeezing it firmly. "You're getting hard at the thought of me making you my bitch, aren't you?" He tightened the pressure on Jared's neck so the man had more trouble breathing.

"No, I j-just..." Jared couldn't come up with an excuse to why he'd be hard, but it became harder to breathe and he clawed at the large hand around his neck. "Can't b-breathe," Jared rasped, eyes watering. He loved every second of it but it hurt despite that fact. Jared didn't even know if he liked the roughness or if he liked that Jensen was finally giving him what he deserved.

"If you shut the fuck up, you wouldn't need to breathe so much," Jensen hissed in the man's ear, rocking his cock faster through the man's asscheeks. "Be good and I'll make it good for both of us." Jensen let go of Jared's cock to reach back and get a few pumps of shampoo to lather on his fingers, easing the pressure on the other's neck. Yeah, he was supposed to be hurting Jared but he wasn't actually going to go in dry. He was going to take care of what was his.

Jared gulped and closed his eyes tight as he felt two fingers enter him right away, the stretch burning and bringing more tears to his eyes.

"Jensen, s-stop," he groaned, his words quiet and scratchy from the unrelenting hand around his neck. He loved it, though. Loved that he was finally being hurt in return.

Jensen tightened his grip around Jared's throat again as he scissored his fingers in Jared's ass.

"You don't want me to stop. You want me to use your ass like a dirty little fuckhole. I'm not stopping until I get what I want. Till I have you filled and covered with my cum to the point where it's spilling out of your filthy ass." Jensen bit at Jared's neck, leaving teethmarks but no blood. "I should face fuck you too, to shut you up. Bet you'd like that." At that point, Jensen was harder than he thought he would be. The scenario was disgusting and degrading for Jared but Jensen knew that if Jared wanted to stop that they would stop. That was what got him off. He could be as violent as he wanted until Jared got uncomfortable. Suddenly, all of his dirtiest desires came out and he knew he was going to fulfill his promises that he spoke to Jared. Jared was going to be fucked out by the time this was over.

"P-le.." Jared gasped, feeling his vision go white around the edges. The stretch was lessening in pain and he tried twisting out from the hold on his neck, pulling desperately at the hand. Truthfully, he started to not like it too much but liked the punishment. His whole body was vibrating with want and his sobs. He couldn't sniffle very well so his nose began running down his face, crying out when two more fingers were added too quickly.

Jensen let Jared's neck go so the man could breathe. His fingers stopped their thrusts to instead rub around the puffy rim. His free hand went back to Jared's wet hair, running his fingers through the wet locks to gently tug the man's head back.

"Do you remember the safe word?" Jensen whispered into Jared's ear. Yes, it was a break in character, but Jensen cared too much about Jared to ignore his discomfort.

Jared gulped in air like he'd never had it before and panted, sighs of relief leaving his lips in huffs.

"Y... Yes..." he whispered, throat sore. He was sure he'd have a bruise but he was more than happy to adorn the violent marks Jensen would put on him. Jared didn't plan on using the safe word at all, needing all the pain he could get. Needed the punishment. He hated himself.

"If something gets too bad, you _will_ use the safe word, understand me?" Jensen's hand gripped Jared's hair tightly to emphasize his point. His fingers thrusted back into Jared until they were knuckle deep, the sudden intrusion causing the muscles to clench around Jensen's slightly lubed fingers.

"Y-Yes..." Jared said quietly, his breaths evening out but still deep and fast paced. "Oh, f-fuck," the male cried out, the multiple fingers shoving at his prostate. His knees felt weak and his cock was leaking against the shower wall. "Please, just..." Jared whined. It took everything in his being to stay in character. He didn't want to act like he liked it.

"Oh, you really are a little slut aren't you? I knew you liked it." Jensen pulled his fingers out and squeezed the shampoo bottle to slick his cock up and position himself at Jared's entrance. "Beg for it like the whore you are," he growled against the back of Jared's neck.

"N-No, don't make me," Jared cried but sharp smack to his ass made him rethink his response. "Fuck m-me, Jensen. Please, fuck me. M'your whore, use me," Jared spilled out; it wasn't a lie either. He really wanted those things.

Jensen shoved his cock all the way inside Jared, cutting off the man's moaning and begging to replace those sounds with a pained grunt. Jensen moaned right next to Jared's ear, letting him hear how much he enjoyed it.

"Such a tight little slut. Your dirty hole just sucks my cock up like its been waiting for me to shove it in all day," he growled as he rolled his hips into the man.

"Fuck!" Jared yelped, pleasure shooting through his body, invading his veins; a burning desire deep in the pit of his stomach that kept whispering evil things in his mind. "Please, S-Sir, stop," Jared moaned, knowing that without the safeword, Jensen wouldn't. Saying stop just added to the excitement. The water was beginning to run cold and not only was Jared writhing in pleasure, he was shivering.

Jensen slapped his hand over Jared's mouth and started a brutal pace into the man, holding him up with an arm around Jared's waist. Each slam into the man drew a grunt from Jensen and a breathless whine from Jared.

"You need to shut the fuck up. Sluts don't talk," Jensen growled into the man's ear.

Jared just kept groaning into the palm covering his mouth, his breaths short and quick from his nose. Every pound into him slammed into his prostate and he was going crazy. He reached a hand between his legs--fuck pretending not to like it--to frantically stroke at his cock.

Jensen pressed his lips to the back of Jared's neck, his frustrations melting away as he thrusted into the man.

"Such a pretty boy," he murmured lovingly. It was out of character; the first time he had ever broken character and it was for Jared. "Gonna come for me, baby?" Now he wasn't even trying to be violent, instead rubbing the man's hips as he shoveled his cock inside him.

Jared nodded quickly, cheek pressed to the cold tile wall. He kept stroking until he was screaming out Jensen's name and cum was spurting onto the wall and into the bottom of the shower.

Fuck! Fuck!" he whimpered, the words muffled from the palm over his mouth, chest heaving. "Please, come in me," Jared whimper, barely audible with the shower beating against their bodies and the porcelain floor as well as the hand.

Jared's broken whimper was Jensen's trigger and he came with a groan, hot cum spilling into Jared's willing heat.

"Fuck..." He removed his hand from Jared's mouth and held the man's hips back against his, staying buried inside the warmth as he came down from his high. "I'm sorry, Jay," he murmured and nuzzled against the man's neck.

"Don't be sorry," Jared panted, trying to get closer to the warmth behind him. "I'm glad you did it."

_I deserved it. ___

"C-Can we get out of the shower? It's really cold now," he laughed. He felt lighter. He just wished it hadn't been a scene, had been real and he fully got what he deserved. But, he would take what he could get.

Jensen chuckled breathlessly and turned the shower off.

"Yeah, baby, sorry about that." He slowly pulled out of Jared and got out of the shower to grab two towels off of the rack. He wrapped Jared in one after he got out and wrapped himself in the other. "Let's go." Jensen walked into to the bedroom and laid down on the clean sheets and waited for the other to join him.

Jared wiped himself down and waited till all the cum dripped out of him. When he was done, he panicked for a moment. He almost forgot about his cuts. Jared kept the towel around his waist and scurried into the bedroom to grab a pair of clean sweatpants and hurriedly put them back on in the bathroom before returning. His hair curled around his face, framing the manly structure but also making it childlike. He flopped into bed with a slight wince and cuddled close to the other male. 

"Thanks for helping me live my fantasy," he mumbled, looking up at him with those bright hazel eyes.

Jensen turned onto his side and pulled Jared into his arms.

"No problem. Did I hurt you too bad?" He curled a strand of Jared's hair around his finger affectionately. "And why are you wearing pants? We usually sleep naked."

"Not too much, it's a good pain," Jared admitted. He bit at his cracked lip and hid his face into Jensen's chest. "And I was cold. Shower was fuckin' freezing," he said. It wasn't necessarily a lie; it _was_ cold and he wanted added warmth. He just didn't include the part of his ripped up thighs. That wasn't lying, was it? "Didn't you get cold?" the boy asked.

Jensen shook his head and pulled the comforter over him and his lover.

"Not really. I was too focused on you," he chuckled and kissed the top of Jared's head. "Can you forgive yourself now? I want you to forget about all of this and be my happy Jared again. Can you do that for me?" Jensen wanted to make the man feel better. He wanted Jared to be the old Jared again that would make him smile all the time and would only cry if it was out of pleasure. The sad and negative Jared... That wasn't Jensen's Jared.

"Yeah, I... I can try," he said. And he really would try. He wanted nothing more than to make Jensen happy. Would do anything to please him. "Thank you for forgiving me," the boy murmured, trying to cuddle as close as he could. He couldn't help but feel so drawn to this actor that just dropped into his life. "I really like you," Jared said quietly after a moment of heavy silence. "Definitely gonna give thanks to you at the beginning of my book," he joked, but it was true. Jensen was helping him push forward. Jared already had four new chapters written within two days. Jensen made him better. Made his life better.

Harley jumped up onto the bed and laid by their feet, looking up at them with his large brown eyes. Jensen chuckled and gently combed his fingers through Jared's curled hair.

"I better be the first one to read all of it once it's finished," he warned playfully. He then looked down at Harley, the dog's tail wagging once one of his owners glanced at him. "Looks like he'll want to be thanked, too."

"I definitely will thank our lil' boy," Jared said and leaned up to kiss the older male's chin. "You haven't shaved recently. I like it," he mumbled, "I could give you hickeys and your scruff would hide it." Jared wished so desperately to date Jensen openly. They weren't even technically dating. Jensen could just be banging other people anyway. Stupid jealousy flared up in his heart and he clung tighter to his favorite person on the planet.

Jensen ran his hands up and down Jared's back.

"I have to shave it once I go back to filming. But you could do it now though." Jensen ran his lips over Jared's throat. "Do you have work tomorrow?"

"Yeah, unfortunately," the other groaned, wiggling with disinterest in the fact of going to work. "I want a different job," Jared whined. The soothing back rubs from Jensen calmed him some, and Jared eventually caved into sleeping; he was emotionally and physically exhausted. 

\---------

Jared woke up around nine to his alarm, happily stretching in the arms of his lover. He looked over to Jensen, noticing his eyes were still closed. The younger man pried himself away from the other, trying not to wake him. He got up and did his normal morning rituals--pee, coffee, breakfast, brushing his teeth, showering. Since Jensen was still asleep, he figured he could change in the room without the other noticing his wounds. He threw the towel into the hamper and dug through his drawers for clean clothes. Before he put on his boxers, he poked at the cuts and healing burn, wincing slightly but shrugging and pulling on the fabric anyway.

Jensen woke up once Jared pulled away, but he kept his eyes closed in hopes that he could reclaim sleep.

But then Jared came back to get dressed.

Jensen cracked his eyes open just in time to see Jared poking at a patch of cuts and burns. His eyes widened in horror and his mind was racing. He snapped out of it as soon as Jared started pulling on his boxers.

"Freeze. Call in sick," he commanded.

Jared did freeze, but his mind and body didn't. Both were going haywire, running through lists of excuses, and trying to pump treacherous blood to his cheeks. He slipped on the boxers and stared at Jensen for a moment before grabbing his cellphone and calling his coworker.

"Hey. Can you cover my shift? I've been puking all morning... No, I'm not pregnant, Joshua... Please?" Jared whined, turning away to face the wall instead of Jensen. "Thanks. I owe you one. Drinks on Saturday, maybe? Alright, thanks again, man. Bye." 

Jared slowly turned and gulped, not saying anything to the other man in the room. Jared knew what Jensen saw. He just didn't know what to say. 

"Jensen... I..." he started, crossing his arms at the wrists in front of him. Jensen slid out of bed and stalked towards Jared, his eyes narrowed in a dangerous scowl.

"Explain. Now," He demanded.

"I... I--um..." Jared didn't want to explain. He didn't want to tell Jensen he ripped open his skin because he was a mentally wounded man and couldn't stand the guilt of what had happened. "It's kinda obvious, isn't it?" he asked, scraping his teeth at his bottom lip. "This isn't my first time doing this either," he added, voice hushed like there were other people around to hear them. He didn't know why he told Jensen he had done it before, but it was explaining it, right?

Jensen's gaze hardened and he pointed to the bed.

"Lay on your back and don't move. Take your boxers off. When I get back, you better be on the bed." He turned and left the room in search of the first aid kit. Jensen's body was tense and tingling with adrenaline. The cuts and burns looked serious and he had a sickening curiosity as to just how deep they ran. A surge of protectiveness shot through Jensen's body at the thought of Jared doing something so reckless. 

_I could've lost him._ Jensen didn't want to look too deep into his feelings for Jared, it would only prove to be a problem. He cared about the man, yes, but he didn't want to accept just how _much_ he cared about him.

Jensen grabbed the first aid kit when he found it and returned to their room, his eyes roaming over Jared's naked body on the bed. Usually that would arouse him, but all he could focus on were those wounds that could've taken Jared away from him.

Jared's chest, cheeks, neck, and ears were all red and he couldn't look at Jensen as he came back in the room so he turned his head, scraping at his bottom lip. 

"I'm sorry..." was all he could say as he felt the bed dip beside him. "I don't need stitches or anything," he assured, still not facing the man of his dreams. He didn't want to see the look of concern, the pity. "P-Please... Don't leave me."


	6. Chapter 6

Jensen cupped Jared's face and gently moved it so the man was looking at him. He leaned down and pressed his forehead to Jared's, needing to feel the man's skin on his.

"Stop biting your lip," he murmured before pulling away to slide down so he was next to Jared's wounded leg. Jensen opened the first aid kit and pulled on gloves so he could clean the leg. "This might hurt," he warned before dabbing the burns and cuts with rubbing alcohol. 

"Ow," Jared hissed, squirming slightly. Tears prickled in his eyes but he allowed the man to clean the wounds. He almost liked the pain. Jared's cock twitched slightly, thickening only a tad as more alcohol swiped away the pus and blood. "Thank you, Jensen," he whimpered, hiding his face behind his hands.

Jensen ignored the hardening cock, not giving Jared the satisfaction of being pleasured.

"I wouldn't have to do this if you talked to me instead of hurting yourself." Jensen's green eyes flickered up to glare slightly at the man. "Do you know how stupid that was? What if you hit a vein? Or it got too infected and you had to get your leg amputated?" Jensen applied burn salve and healing gel on the cuts. Jared was right, they weren't deep enough to need stitches but they would take a while to heal.

Jared began actually crying. He was really stupid. A freak. 

"I-I didn't want y-you to think I was being dramatic," he mumbled behind his hands, whining when the sting was back but soothed right after. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." he cried. Jensen would probably leave him after this. Jared was stupid and he was nothing but a sad kid stuck in his own world. He felt Jensen pull back but he didn't uncover his face, still incredibly embarrassed.

Jensen's face softened and he instantly felt the slam of guilt for making Jared cry.

"Jay... Baby..." He set the bandages to the side and took his gloves off so he could take hold of Jared's hands. "Look at me, please." He gently pried the man's hands away from his face and looked down at the blood shot hazel eyes. "I'm sorry for overreacting. I don't want to lose you," he said sadly. He peppered the man's face with soft kisses after he wiped the tears away.

The words comforted Jared, knowing that Jensen wanted him as much as Jared wanted him. Or... Nearly as much. Jared hugged him close and cried openly.

"I'm so afraid of losing you, Jen. I wish you didn't have to leave," he whimpered, clinging to him like he was life support. Jared had never felt so strongly for another human before and it was slowly ripping his heart to shreds knowing Jensen would go back to his superstar life while Jared was left back in Texas. At least he'd have Harley.

Jensen didn't comment on Jared's confession and instead pet the man's hair. He understood what Jared meant, but he couldn't just drop his career for another person. 

"Don't hurt yourself again. Please?" the actor asked, weaving his fingers into the top of Jared's hair. "Promise me," he said and held out his pinky finger. It was childish but he knew that Jared would appreciate it.

Jared huffed out a broken laugh and curled his pinky finger around Jensen's. 

"I promise," he said quietly, sighing softly. He hoped he'd never get the urge again. 

\---------

Over the next week, the two were closer than they had been. Jensen was more wary but Jared kind of liked that. He liked how protective Jensen got. As well as getting closer, Jared had meticulously planned out a romantic evening to show Jensen how much he loved him. Jensen thought Jared had work, but really, Jared was at home cleaning, cooking, and setting up. He had incense and candles burning throughout the house, rose petals on the bed, a nice bottle of wine he saved up for on the dinner table, and steak with a baked potato and broccoli sitting as the entrees. He even made an apple pie.

When Jensen came home from filming, he was planning to collapse onto his bed and force Jared into becoming his body pillow. He was exhausted from the physical and mental toll that action movies took on actors. He noticed then that it was darker than usual, the only light coming from flickers of candle flames.

"Jared?" he called into the apartment. He found it strange that such sweet smelling candles were lit, but it wasn't unpleasant. 

Then savory scent of steak cut through the sweetness of the candles and Jensen's mouth watered. He hadn't eaten since breakfast and even then it was only a few strips of bacon and black coffee because they ran out of cream and sugar on set. 

Jensen followed his nose into the dining room that had vanilla candles scattered around various areas in the room. The table was set with a mouthwatering meal and Jensen's eyes immediately went to Jared's anticipating form.

"This is amazing, Jay. What's all this for?"

Jared jumped slightly when he heard his name called. He waited anxiously in their little dining room; he had even "dressed up". He put on his nicest shirt--a black button up--and his jeans without holes. He was wearing just socks, however.

"Agh... I just... Wanted to do something nice for you," he replied and pulled out a chair for Jensen before filing up their glasses. He sat down on the chair adjacent to Jensen's, eagerly waiting for him to try the food.

Jensen sat down and smiled at Jared.

"This _is_ nice. I like it. Thank you, Jared." This was the first time someone had cooked for him save for his mother and his private chef. He was always the one taking his lovers out to eat or seducing them with his cooking and domesticity. This... Was indeed a pleasant change. "This smells amazing. I hope you know it's taking all the restraint I have not to rip this steak apart," Jensen chuckled before taking a sip of wine.

"Go ahead! I didn't cook it just so you could stare at it," he laughed and watched Jensen begin to cut his steak, Harley laying down near the table, waiting for a scrap to fall. "I just... You've been nothing but good to me and I haven't really shown you how much I care about you, so, yeah," Jared explained and "accidentally" dropped his fork. Harley's ears perked up for a fraction of a second before realizing it was nothing tasty. Jared pushed his seat back so he could crawl under the table to where his fork had fallen to. Instead of picking up, he crawled betweens Jensen's legs and began unzipping his pants. "Just continue eating," he purred from under the table, tugging the man's flaccid cock from his pants and stroking it gently.

Jensen jumped with surprise when Jared first touched him and let out a moan when his cock was touched. It didn't take much time for him to harden in Jared's hand, paying more attention to the pleasure than the food.

Jared gently tongued at his slit, continuing his gentle strokes before in one quick move, he swallowed down almost all of Jensen's cock, having to take his time with getting that last few inches into his mouth. He swallowed around his cock, teary eyed, and pulled back with a cough. 

"Tell me when you're close," he said, immediately suckling on the head, fingertips dancing along the swollen rod.

Jensen's head went back to rest on his chair, eyes closed in blissful pleasure.

"Fuck, that mouth," he groaned out and gripped the sides of the chair. He refrained from grabbing Jared's hair because he worried he would start fucking into his sweet mouth.

Jared pulled back and ever so gently grazed his teeth over the sensitive head. 

"Eat," he almost commanded, chuckled, licking up and down the pulsing shaft. "Didn't spend hours makin' this so you wouldn't eat it." Jared took him back into his wet heat and hollowed his cheeks out, sucking him down into his throat.

Jensen groaned again and grabbed his fork and knife.

"If I choke, it's on you," the older malr joked before trying to eat. The food was chewed slowly, Jensen being more focused on the royal treatment his cock was getting from Jared's mouth.

Jared continued to suck and stroke, pulling back to ghost his fingers over the veins.

"Wanted to make tonight all about you," he murmured from under the table. "Wanted to make up for what I did... Wanted to..." Jared took a deep breath in, "wanted to know if you were okay to try _it_ again." Jared was truly afraid of rejection but he knew in his heart Jensen would have a good reason to.

Jensen tensed up and suddenly he wasn't as pleased as he was before. His mind was racing and he cleared his throat to give the man a small and nervous smile.

"Well, at least you made me dinner before you tried to get into my pants," he joked lamely before shuddering at Jared's touch.

"We don't have to," Jared said quickly, feel his heart drop a tad. It was still disappointing, but Jensen had his reasons. Jared rested his forehead on Jensen's knee and sighed. "I'm sorry," he whispered, gently rubbing up and down the other man's calf. "I'm so sorry."

Jensen closed his eyes and gently stroked Jared's hair. He knew the man felt terrible and he knew if it was him, he'd want another chance to prove he wasn't incompetent.

"We can do it." Jensen cupped Jared's face and tilted it up so Jared was looking up at him. "I trust you to do it right this time," he assured before leaning down to kiss the man.

Jared beamed and kissed him passionately but still slow. He pulled back to crawl back out from under the table, banging his head on his way out with a thunk and an "ow!". The younger man started laughing but wrapped his arms around Jensen's neck from behind.

"You wanna finish your food?" he chuckled, turning and biting at his earlobe.

Jensen laughed and rubbed Jared's head.

"Why aren't you eating, huh? Gonna need your energy big boy," the actor laughed and poked Jared's stomach.

Jared leaned down with his long arm and stroked at the head of Jensen's softening cock. 

"Wanted to make you feel good," he replied, giving one last kiss to the side of his head before he sat across from him to eat his own meal. He cut a tiny piece of steak and fed it to Harley, loving the happiness that sparked in his soulful eyes. 

Jensen shuddered and stared at Jared as the man returned to his seat. It was a shame Jensen was going to try bottoming again because he really wanted to take Jared there on the table.

"If I have the strength, I'm fucking you later," Jensen warned before taking another bite of his perfectly cooked steak.

Jared huffed out a laugh and ate his much needed protein and carbs. He stopped halfway through and took Jensen's fork from him right as he put it up to his lips and ate the piece of steak on it before going into the kitchen and putting the forks in the sink and opened the oven. He had it on the lowest temperature to keep the pie warm and he brought it out with oven mitts and set it down on a towel. Jared grabbed ice cream from the freezer to bring out along with two clean plates and spoons and a fresh knife to cut the pie.

"Tada!"

Jensen's eyes widened and he suddenly wished he didn't eat so much steak.

"If you keep stuffing me with food, I don't think you'll want to try topping me tonight," he warned half seriously. Of course, he was thinking twice about this; how the hell was he supposed to finish all of this food and not shit himself if Jared tried sticking something up his ass? Was that something that happened to people? 

Jared laughed and rolled his eyes.

"You'll be fine. I've bottomed on a full stomach before, it feels fine," he laughed even harder, having to put down the knife for a moment to continue laughing. He wiped at the corners of his eyes and placed a piece of pie on each of their clean plates then scooped up some ice cream onto each. He put away their leftovers into the fridge, ice cream in the freezer, and came back to the table to eat his yummy creation happily.

Jensen glared slightly at his lover before beginning to eat.

"Whatever you say. Don't say I didn't warn you," the actor said as he licked ice cream from his lips. "You're lucky the pie is so damn good. I can't believe this is your recipe." He closed his eyes to savor the flavor of the pie. A smile came to his face when he remembered that it was actually the pie that brought him and Jared together. "Should take you with me as my personal pie baker," he chuckled jokingly.

Something like hope sparkled in Jared's eyes but it was quickly snuffed out. 

"If I had the money, I'd actually open up my own bakery," he mentioned, eating the last of his pie and ice cream. "It would be fun to have that. I'd feel good enough at the end of the day to do homework and work on my book," he said, leaning back to wait for Jensen to finish before he took the dishes to put in the sink.

Jensen closed his eyes and leaned back in his seat as he chewed the last piece of his pie. He would never get over how fucking _good_ pie was and how amazing it tasted when Jared was the one making it.

"So should I go get ready or do you have something else planned?" he asked once Jared came back from taking care of the dishes.

"Mm, no, you don't have to do anything," he said and pulled Jensen from his chair and led him to their bedroom. His cheeks heated when he remembered he put rose petals on the bed and he nibbled his lip. Jared smiled and eased Jensen back down onto the bed and crawled gently on top of him, kissing him slowly and lovingly as he ran his hands up and down his chest.

Jensen's hands went to Jared's hips out of habit and he pulled away to chuckle.

"Rose petals and candles? Really?" He grinned up at Jared, amusement dancing in his green orbs.

Jared pouted and lowered his head to nip and suck along the man's jaw, careful not to leave any marks.

"What? You don't like it?" he purred, playfully biting at his earlobe before pulling back to just sit on his lap and run his hands up under the older man's shirt, gently rubbing his nipples with the pads of his thumbs. "Just wanted to make it the best second first time," he said, frowning slightly at the fact that it had to be a second sort of first time.

Jensen shuddered at the treatment of his nipples; they always were more sensitive than usual.

"Hey, you didn't know what you were doing." He rubbed circles into Jared's hips after placing his hands back on them and admired the man from his position. "Why haven't you ridden me yet? I feel like we should do that before anything else," Jensen half teased. He was having second thoughts--more like third thoughts--but that was normal. He didn't particularly want to take something as big as Jared's dick up his ass.

"Mmm, maybe I'll get you right to the edge then pull out and ride you," Jared cooed and eased Jensen's shirt off of his torso and got off of him to rid him of his jeans as well. "Love that you go commando," he chuckled and took off his own clothes. Jared reverently stroked at the man's cock, rubbing a warm hand over his thigh. "I'll be slow. I won't hurt you, I promise," he reassured him before leaning down to peck sweet kisses at his shaft, pumping himself as he took the man into his mouth for the second time that night, looking up at him with the bright hazel eyes that Jensen had grown to enjoy.


	7. Chapter 7

"The city is really nice to just walk around in when it's not boiling hot outside," Jared chuckled. It was nearing December so it was getting colder but not enough to keep people indoors. It was nice out. Jared just needed a light jacket because of how hot he could get in general--he never understood why he got so intensely warm. "There's a couple parks around here, too. We should take Harley to one of them some day!" he said excitedly, bumping his shoulder into Jensen's. The two had completely forgot about going around town but one lazy afternoon when both men had the day off, Jared reminded him of it and in five minutes, the pair were out the door. Jared's heart thrummed happily inside him knowing that Jensen was genuinely interested in seeing the city.

Jensen looked around, his eyes covered with sunglasses and his jacket covering most of his body and facial features. 

"So I have my own personal tour guide, huh?" He looked to his side and admired how nice Jared looked with his cold-flushed cheeks. "Where to first?"

"There's this supposedly haunted place we can take a tour of," Jared mentioned, hand itching to hold Jensen's hand. "Or, you could meet my dealer," he laughed, looking over at his crush happily. "There's a place where someone can take our picture in a field of wildflowers, too."

Jensen shook his head at the last suggestion.

"No cameras. A haunted house sounds cool, though. Do you get scared easily?" The movie star smirked and tucked his cold hands into his pockets, not wanting to risk the paparazzi recognizing him and taking pictures of him holding a man's hand.

Jared sighed quietly but shrugged. 

"Not too easily. I love horror movies. But the thought of it being real does creep me out," he replied, adjusting his beanie. "It's just about a mile from here..." Jared said softly. "When do you have to go back to LA?"

Jensen paused when Jared brought up LA. He was finishing filming at the end of the week and he didn't know how to tell Jared that he already had his flight back to LA booked. He supposed now was the best time since the taller one brought it up. 

"Two weeks," the actor admitted quietly.

Jared's breath caught and he looked down, biting his lip once again. 

"Oh. Um... Alright," he murmured, shoving his hands deep into his pockets. He fought back tears and took a shaky breath. "We're coming up on the haunted house," he said quietly and walked quickly toward it so he could hide his tears. He'd have to go back to his normal, shitty life. He fell in love and it was being ripped away from him.

Jensen reached out for his lover but stopped himself just before he touched the material of Jared's coat. He put his hand into his pocket and cleared his throat to relieve it of the sudden tightening. 

"So this is the hotel, huh?" Jensen took in the abandoned looking building. It didn't even look like a professional haunted place, which he supposed would explain why it was such a well known attraction.

"Yeah. I've never been here before, but it seems fun," the other replied before going up to the counter and purchasing two tickets. He handed one to Jensen and bit his lip.

"Maybe this could be your souvenir," he joked and smiled sadly, fixating his eyes on Jensen's face. Trying to remember every wrinkle, pore, hair, and especially his eyes. He snapped out of it and began walking again to where the employee was taking tickets.

Jensen took the ticket and looked at it. It had a cheesy image of a ghost and a jack o'lantern.

"Souvenir?" He looked back up to see that Jared had already walked off. 

_Jay..._ he thought sadly. He honestly didn't know what he was going to do. It wasn't like he _wanted_ to leave Jared, but they both knew it was bound to happen. It wasn't like he could stay in Texas forever.

Jensen caught up with Jared and handed the employee his ticket so it could get clipped. Jared was right, Jensen was going to keep it as a souvenir. 

"So..." The actor trailed off, trying to change the subject.

Jared was immediately spooked by a shitty, built-in animatronic robot behind a curtain. His reaction involved grasping at Jensen's hand tightly with a tiny gasp. He glared at the skeleton and rolled his eyes. 

"They try to get you scared before the real shit, I guess," Jared mumbled bitterly, red coating his cheeks from embarrassment. He tried moving but realized he attached his hand to Jensen's. He quickly snatched his hand away and walked forward quickly, crossing his arms in front of his chest as he took in the sight of old wallpaper and rusted doorknobs. "The website said someone hanged themselves in room 213. Wanna go check that out?" Jared asked, trying desperately to keep hood voice steady.

Jensen stepped forward and put his hand on Jared's shoulder. 

"If you stop being so off first," he countered. 

"You don't like PDA and I feel bad," he said quickly, turning to look into green eyes he'd miss so much. Jared looked down and away before moving along, trailing his fingertips over the worn walls. 

Jensen frowned and took Jared's hand. 

"It's fine. I want to hold your hand if it's okay," he murmured as he pulled Jared close to his side.

"E-Even if someone recognizes you?" Jared's hand was slack in Jensen's as they moved about the hallways, making their way to room 213. Jared's heart was pounding with exhileration from the house and from Jensen's affection.

Jensen's hand tightened around Jared's. 

"I'll live with it." He wanted to cherish what time he would have left with Jared. Hell, if someone caught them right now then perhaps he could bring Jared back--

Jensen cut his thoughts off there. There was no way he could move Jared to LA with him. They weren't even together for more than six months which was the usual marker in relationships.

Jared's heart fluttered and he looked down again, trying to hide his blush behind his hair. They entered the room and immediately, Jared got chills. 

"Man, it's cold," he murmured, squeezing Jensen's hand as he pulled him around the room. He slid his free hand along ugly-patterened sheets, the hairs on the back of his neck standing. "Dude, this feels weird... Like the entire r-room..."

Jensen wrapped an arm around Jared's waist.

"It could be the A/C or something," he suggested. "Do you want to go to a different room?"

"U-Um... Sure, yeah," Jared said and let Jensen lead him out of the room but not without a look behind him, just to be sure. 

They spent two more hours looking through the hotel, sometimes laughing at the god awful paintings, sometimes staying absolutely quiet in rooms where someone's spirit allegedly stayed behind. 

They left the haunted house, the air still crisp, but the sun shining. 

"Let's take Harley for a walk," Jared said, biting on his lower lip.

Jensen nodded in agreement. 

"Sounds like a plan. I bet the pup will like that. But let's hurry because I want to kiss those lips that you _shouldn't_ be biting," he scolded the younger male. 

Jared's lip slipped from his teeth and his chuckled, bumping Jensen's hip with his own. 

"Oh, whatever," Jared teased and they walked back to their apartment to get Harley. The moment they were in the safety of the apartment, Jared slotted his lips against the actor's, heart beating wildly. The fact that Jensen would be home in two weeks wouldn't stop buzzing around in his head and was driving him wild.

Jensen's arms wrapped around Jared's waist as he kissed the man. He could feel the energy and the desperation in the kiss and it broke his heart because he was going to leave Jared soon. He was no stranger to flings, but Jared was different. Jensen was going to miss him. He actually cared about Jared.

It was to the point where he wanted to at least keep in contact with Jared, even if they were miles away. He would miss the man's long chestnut hair and his laugh that brought tears to his beautiful hazel eyes when something was particularly funny. Jensen's chest ached when he realized he wouldn't get to wake up next to Jared any more. 

_I'm going to miss you so much_ , the actor thought sadly.

Jared broke the heated kiss after a moment, breathing with the other man. 

"I'll put his leash on," he murmured before pressing a chaste, wet kiss to Jensen's lips before walking off to get Harley. "C'mon, Harley! Let's go for a walk!" he said excitedly. 

Jensen watched his lover with a look of fondness. He loved how sweet Jared was with things he cared about, it made Jensen's heart hurt just thinking about how devastated he was going to be when Jensen had to say goodbye. 

_I don't_ have _to say goodbye_ , he thought. But the idea of bringing Jared to LA, once again, was shot down with a shake of the head. 

Then an idea came to mind. A fucked up, cruel idea, but an idea none-the-less.

When Jared stood up, Jensen quickly tucked the idea away under things he was going to regret. 

"Ready to go?" he asked with a smile that made everything seem alright. 

\-----

Time passed and before Jensen knew it, he had a week left until he was supposed to leave for LA.

Or, that was what he told Jared. 

Jensen slipped out of bed that morning while Jared was sound asleep. He looked down at the younger man and felt his heart start to crack when he thought about how he was going to react. He gently tucked a lock of hair behind Jared's ear and kissed his temple. 

"I'll miss you," he murmured, knowing Jared wouldn't hear him because he was a heavy sleeper.

Jensen packed his things and tiptoed to the front of the apartment, giving a sleeping Harley a scratch behind the ear and looking around at the four walls that he wouldn't see ever again. 

He set his spare key and a goodbye note down on the coffee table before sliding out of the front door. 

Jensen then got into his cab and left his dog, lover, and new home behind.


	8. Chapter 8

The first thing Jared noticed was how the bed was no longer occupied. The second thing he noticed was that he smelled no coffee or breakfast. Usually when Jensen got up before Jared, he made coffee and breakfast. Jared's eyebrows furrowed together and he got up, looking around. Nothing looked particularly out of the ordinary until he saw the note on the coffee table in their living room. He yawned and padded over to the note and picked it up, not seeing the key on the table, fully expecting some kind of 'I went for a jog' or 'had to meet with my producer'. He didn't expect Jensen's goodbye on it. His eyes watered as he read it and he sunk down into the couch. Harley jumped up and nuzzled his face against Jared's thigh. 

_Jared,_  
I know I said two weeks but it was only one. I figured it would be better--we would be better--if we had no goodbyes. I'll still contact you. I still want you in my life.  
I'll miss you, Jay.  
-Jensen 

Jared didn't know he was sobbing until he was doubled over in his seat, heavy tears dropping onto the piece of paper, Harley trying to comfort him. He crumpled up the piece of paper and threw it across the room.

"God dammit!" he yelled, digging the heels of palms into his forehead.

\---------

The bowl lit up nicely and Jared held the smoke in his lungs before blowing it out of his nose. The Oscars were on that night and he had heard Jensen was nominated for Best Actor. He had no idea why he wanted to torture himself and watch the man he fell in love with 8 months ago. 

Time had passed slowly. Jared smoked and cut more than he communicated with other people. Him and Jensen texted for a solid month before the actor's replies became fewer and fewer. Jared frequently lit up and reread them, Harley laying at his feet. The Merle seemed to be adjusting, but knew Jared needed the comfort. 

Jared lit up his bowl once again and pulled steadily before choking as he saw Jensen on the red carpet with his co-star... Kissing. Jared set his pipe down as quickly as he could to stumble to the bathroom and throw up the two boxes of Chinese food he ate prior. The vomit was accompanied by tears that he was now used to crying. Jared sobbed on the bathroom floor, Harley scratching on the door. 

The anger built up slowly and instead of going to back to watch the awards show, he left the bathroom, grabbed his laptop, and furiously started typing. 

Jared worked on his book for four days straight, only getting five hours of sleep each night when he usually needed 10 to feel decent. He called out from work with a lie of the flu, as well; he was dead set on finishing it.

 _If Jensen can be big movie star, then I can be a famous fucking author then not cast him in the movie_ , Jared thought bitterly yet childishly. 

He sent it to six different publishers the second he put the final period on the document and made himself an actual dinner instead of coffee and ramen. After his dinner, he collapsed onto his bed, only caring about getting sleep.

He woke up 14 hours later and spent another seven days until he heard the sound of his phone buzzing one morning at eight. He sat up and yawned, wiping at his eyes first before grabbing at his phone and answering the call from a number he didn't recognize.

"Hello," Jared said roughly, voice thick with sleep.

"Hello, is this Jared Padalecki?" the voice answered.

"Yes, may I ask who is calling?" Jared asked back, worrying at his lip.

"We are Cohen Publishing and we wanted to know if you could stop by our office and talk about your book," the voice said, completely calm unlike the fireworks going off in Jared's body.

"Y-Yes! Of course! What's the address?" 

\---------

The next month consisted of Jared revising and coming to a deal with the publishing company. It was finally released three months after on his birthday and made a huge hit. Two million copies sold within three days. He was getting phone calls from producers a week later. The one he wanted to meet with the most was Mark Pellegrino. He was an astounding director and producer and Jared desperately wanted to meet with him. They set up a time to meet and Jared drove his dog to his parents' house so they could take care of him while he went to LA for a few days. 

\---------

The office Jared was sitting in made him bounce his leg with anxiousness. 

"Hello, Mr. Padalecki," the rough voice said behind him and Jared got up, being pulled in by Mark's features the moment his eyes landed on crystal blue.

"H-Hi, it's so nice to meet you, Sir," Jared said quickly, shaking his hand. 

Mark grinned like the cat who caught the canary. 

"The pleasure is all mine, Mr. Padalecki. You can call me Mark." The producer didn't realize the taller man was that attractive in person. If everything went smoothly, he would definitely try to sweep him off of his feet.

"U-Uh, Mark, yeah," Jared said, heart beating rapidly. Mark gestured for him to sit and Jared did so, nervously rubbing his thighs. "So w-what about my um..." Jared trailed off, staring, mesmerized by the blue. "My um... My book," Jared spits out quickly, face catching on fire. "What about my book seemed to make it look like it'd be a great movie?" Jared asked, nervously running a hand through his hair and biting his lip.

Mark chuckled a deep, throaty laugh at how cute the flustered author looked. 

"The book was such a great hit with the people, it has millions asking for more, and it's only been available for a little under a month. As soon as whispers came up about there being a movie, one of Hollywood's A-list actors jumped at the chance of starring in it. You, my friend--" Mark winked at the author, "--are a long way from being a coffee shop cashier."

Jared's heart jumped into his throat and he grinned, dimples and everything. 

"Thank you so much for this opportunity, Sir--Mark. You're the first person I've talked to about this because I love your work so much," he complimented, looking down at his hands shyly.

Mark grinned and waved the man's compliments off. 

"Thank you, Jared, but this is the time to praise your work. I read _Supernatural_ in two days and I knew I had to snatch you up before some other director tried. I already have a few actors up for the main roles if you'd like to go over them and meet with them." Mark cleared his throat. "After I show you around of course," he added.

"Yeah! That would be amazing, thank you," Jared said and the two stood, Mark showing him around set. It was large and unlike anything Jared had ever seen before. "So, um, would we film it here or somewhere else? I thought, um, Vancouver would be nice for a lot of the outdoors scenes," he said and put his hands in his pockets, unable to stop the lip chewing as the two walked around set.

Mark nodded in agreement, doing nothing to mask his chuckle. 

"You've obviously been doing your research. I'm impressed. I can see Vancouver being the set." Then Mark looked up at Jared with a smirk on his face. "And I gotta ask. Who have you been thinking about for the cast? Because I've got to say Sam sounds a lot like you." The producer/director stopped walking, making the author stop in place as well. "The baby face, the hazel eyes... The long, shaggy hair..." Mark touched a strand of Jared's hair and curled it around his finger before tucking it behind Jared's ear. "Perfect fit." From the look on Jared's face, Mark knew he had him right where he wanted him.

What he didn't know was that they were being watched by a familiar set of angry green eyes.

Jared's breath hitched and his lower belly stirred with something another human hadn't caused in almost a year. 

"U-Uh... I only... I only took acting at school," Jared confessed, rubbing at the back of his neck nervously. "I dunno if I'd be a-as good as you think I'd be." He sighed shakily, shyly, and gulped. "So, um, what characters have you found potential actors for?" he asked, trying not to have his eyes wander to the lucious lips adorning Mark's face.

Mark pulled away and cleared his throat.

"Right, as I told you earlier, I have one actor looking to secure the roll of Dean. Come on, I'll introduce you to him." Mark led the author to a string of trailers that housed actors and actresses during filming. "It's a wonder he even offered. He's supposed to be on vacation for a while since one of his movies came out." They approached one of the trailers and Mark reached up to knock on the door.

Jared followed happily but nervously, trying not to look over that the gorgeous man who would soon be his boss.

Before Mark's knuckles could even touch the door, however, it swung open to reveal none other than Jensen Ackels.

The moment the door opened, Jared's cheeks went red with something like anger, sadness, fear... All at once. Jared was silently imploding and he forced a smile onto his face.

"Ahh, Mr. Ackles. It's nice to meet you," he strained to get out, shoving a hand forward. "May I just say you looked handsome at the Oscars with your _date_." The words had so much more meaning behind them than the director next to him realized. They are venomous and meant to rub at Jensen the wrong way. "You enjoyed my book? Or did Mark, here, contact you about it?" he asked, gritting his teeth together.

Jensen's face was calm and passive, years of acting enabling him to shield his emotions from being near Jared again. 

"Actually, I read it in one sitting. Couldn't put it down because it felt like I was there," the actor replied cooly, taking the author's hand in a bittersweet shake. Jared shoved his hand into his pocket the second Jensen let go like the touch physically hurt him.

Mark nodded and smiled. 

"Jensen and I are great friends and I thought he was great for the role. He contacted me before I could offer, though," the director chuckled as they entered the actor's trailer, Jared following behind him.

"Was this the trailer you used when y'all were shootin' that other movie?" the younger male asked, looking around, making sure to not even get a foot near Jensen.

"Yes, it was," Jensen answered before Mark could get a word in. It was amazing seeing Jared again, even if the now professional author was mad at him. 

Mark was about to say something about the tension in the air when his phone went off and he looked down to check who was calling him. His eyes widened and he looked up at the two celebrities. 

"I have to run but I'll be back in around an hour, you two should get to know each other in that time." He looked sick to his stomach as he ran out of the trailer, shutting the door behind him.

Jared feared that Mark would have had to run out. He feared he'd be left alone with Jensen. The male turned and stared at Jensen for a few moments. All rational thought flew straight out of his head and he took the two strides to walk over and punch Jensen right in the cheek. Jared pulled his hand back, unaware that his cheeks were dampening from his tears.

Jensen hissed and cupped his face. 

"I deserve that," he admitted through clenched teeth before looking up to see Jared's wet eyes. The actor's face softened and he dropped his hand from his face. "Jay, I'm so sorry. I know it doesn't make up for what I did but--"

"No, fuck you!" Jared growled and pushed the other man, clenching his fists at his sides. "You have no idea how fucking hurt I was," he cried, pushing him again. "You fucking ruined me, you piece of shit! Having a goodbye would've been better! Are you that much of an idiot?" Jared yelled, voice cracking from his sobs.

Jensen didn't hit back but he didn't fall too far either. 

"Jared, I thought it would be better to just leave, I'm sorry!" He took a step forward, his hands out reached as he neared the taller man. "Please, just let me explain!"

Jared slapped his hands back before taking a steping backward, wrapping his arms around himself for comfort. 

"You get two fucking minutes before I walk out of here and tell Mark I don't want your ass," Jared growled, body visibly shaking with hurt and anger.

"Jared... I've never, _ever_ cared about someone as much as I care about you. It was terrifying and I didn't know how to approach me havin' to go back to LA. I was even thinkin' about bringing you with me, but I couldn't. You were supposed to be just a fling and I kept telling myself that you were going to stay a fling. But then..." Jensen sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "I started thinking about how I actually loved you." The actor looked Jared directly in the eyes. "I love you. And I was scared. I know it's not a good reason to leave but... Well, I have no other reason."

Jared's posture became a little less defensive as the other spoke, arms falling to his sides. He listened, tears still steadily falling, his heart bursting. 

"Don't ever fucking do that again," he whispered before taking a few steps closer to cup Jensen's cheeks and kiss him lovingly, harshly. A sudden thought came to him and almost made him sick and forced himself to pull back. "What... What about Jessica?" he asked, words laced with hurt.

Jensen shook his head and wrapped his arms around Jared's waist where they longed to be for the past eight months. 

"She meant nothing, Jay. I haven't been seeing anyone unless it was for publicity," he said, the promise evident in his voice. Jensen felt his eyes prickle with tears at finally being able to hold his ex-lover. "I knew you'd be able to get _Supernatural_ published," he added with a watery chuckle.

Jared's chest felt lighter, but still guarded anyway. 

"It was you and your shit publicity that got me workin' on it more than usual," he huffed and pushed his hands through Jensen's hair. "I've missed you so much, jerk..."

Jensen smiled and ran his hands over the man's sides. 

"I missed you, too. A lot. I'm proud of you." He hugged the author to his chest, missing the taller man. "How is Harley? I miss him, too."

Jared leaned into his touch and gently nipped at the soft neck of his lover. 

"He's doing fine. Could tell he missed you. He was really worried about me for a long time..." he said quietly, trying to shove the worry about his cuts. "He's at my parents' place but I gotta start lookin' for a place of my own before I go get him." Jared was terrified of leaving everything behind but he finished school and got his associates degree and now that he was almost 100 percent sure he'd get the movie deal, he'd have to call and quit his job as a barista.

Jensen let out a deep sigh and pulled Jared's head back.

"You could come live with me," he offered. "You let me stay with you, it's only fair I return the favor." The actor gave a charming smile, caressing the younger male's face and running his thumb over his wet but drying cheek. "I have guest rooms if you don't feel comfortable sleeping with me. And there's lots of space for Harley to run around."

Jared gasped quietly at the offer and thought it over in his head, gnawing at his lip. 

"Th-That would be good. I'll pay rent and stuff," he said, trying not to cry all over again. "Thank you, Jen..." he murmured with a sigh. "If only we knew I was gonna get published. Then I could've possibly came with you."

Jensen let out a quiet chuckle. 

"Jay, you don't have to pay rent. I own the property and I'm not going to take your money. Besides, soon you're going to be richer than I am, Mr. Best seller." The actor winked. "I knew you were going to get published. You're too good a writer to not get published," Jensen complimented.

Jared flushed and turned his head away shyly, removing his arms from around Jensen's neck. 

"It was fueled by rage because of you. I should give you some damn royalties," the younger male joked, looking back into green eyes. "So, you love me?" He didn't really mean it as a question but at the same time he wanted to make sure.

Jensen's laugh quieted and he looked into Jared's eyes. 

"Never loved someone like this. And I'd like to start over." His eyes narrowed into angry slits. "And as soon as possible so Mark keeps his hands off," he grumbled.

Jared blushed darker and his eyes widened. 

"Y-You saw that?" Jared yipped and immediately felt bad. "I'm sorry. I hadn't been with a single person since you left me and he was being so nice and I loved the w-way he touched me..." 

Jensen growled under his breath and tightened his grip on Jared's hips. 

"You're mine. And he could never touch you the way I touch you. Please you the way I do." Jensen's lips found the exposed skin of Jared's neck, possessive kisses littering the skin.

"J-Jensen," Jared breathed, body sensitive to the other's touches. "I didn't know you were h-here... Thought I finally had another chance with someone," he explained, tilting his head to expose more flesh, goosebumps covering the surface of his skin.

Jensen walked both of them towards the wall until he had Jared pinned against it. 

"I saw him touch you and I wanted to rip his damn hand off. And you were blushing and stuttering like a crushing schoolgirl," the actor growled.

"I c-couldn't help it!" Jared defended, cheeks red hot like they were when Mark was flirting with him. "You're not the only attractive person on the planet and I thought you didn't w-want me anymore." Jared's voice crackled slightly at the end, breaths coming in soft pants.

"I'll always want you. And you'll always be mine." The actor's teeth nibbled at the skin of Jared's neck, admiring the taste of his lover's skin that he had missed. "Want to make sure everyone knows it too." Jensen's hands slid to Jared's ass, grabbing it and squeezing roughly, possessively.

"O-Oh, God," Jared whispered, spreading his legs subconsciously for the other, hands grabbing at the actor's shirt, tugging on it. "Please, Jen..." He needed Jensen in a way that he never felt he could need someone.

Jensen pulled Jared back by his belt loops, dragging the taller man to his bed. 

"You're still my good boy, right?" the older male asked as he gently pushed Jared back onto the bed.

"Yes," Jared replied all too quickly, so ready to please the other man. He got up on his knees and pulled the other down with him to kiss him deeply, fingers working at his belt. "Need to taste you," he murmured against the lips he had missed so much and hurriedly tried unzipping and unbuttoning the other's pants. He parted their kiss before he pushed Jensen onto his back and pulled his jeans off, mouthing at the hard outline of his cock in his underwear.

Jensen groaned at the other's enthusiasm, his hand moving to pet Jared's hair back. 

"Nothin' stopping you, sweetheart. I missed how much you loved sucking my cock," the actor cooed appreciatively.

Jared's cheeks only got redder and he pulled off the male's briefs without words and took his entire cock into his mouth. He gagged and had to pull back, excitement making him practically forget how to give head. 

"Sorry," he sniffed and gently pushed his lips back around the pulsing rod, taking it in slowly, almost shyly now.

Jensen growled in the back of his throat as he watched his lover. 

"You're so eager for it." He held a hand on the back of Jared's head, watching the man. "I want to see you choke on my cock. I wanna bring tears to those pretty eyes," he purred. He hadn't forgotten his odd kink and wanted to see it again.

Jared's own dick twitched in his jeans at the dirty words. He had forgotten how Jensen loved when he cried. He took his cock down deeper, trying to open his throat more. He swallowed experimentally to test his limits on how far he could go and gagged but the hand on his head kept him there, eyes watering and nose becoming red and runny.

Jensen watched with pleased eyes as the man choked him down. 

"Look at me in the eyes, baby, then I'll let you off." He caressed Jared's cheek with his free hand, holding the man's head in a way that ensured he had total control over the man's mouth.

Jared looked up at the other, trying to breathe in through his nose as he was kept down on the thick shaft. Hazel was glossed over with tears and he desperately pulled at Jensen's shirt to let him pull back.

Jensen pulled Jared's head back so the man could take deep, greedy gulps of breath. 

"You look so fucking pretty, Jay." The actor ran his thumb over Jared's spit-slicked, swollen lips as he admired him. "I wanna see how many times I can get you to come before you beg me to stop."

"M-Mark might come back soon," Jared said worriedly, voice hoarse. "He'll kick me off set and tell other directors to not hire me or something." Jared sniffled and leaned over Jensen to get a tissue to wipe hise nose then toss it in the waste basket before slowly pushing up Jensen's shirt, kissing his toned stomach all the way up to his nipples, chest trapping the male's cock.

Jensen growled and his hands went to Jared's sides. 

"Fine. Then we're going to go back to my house after this and I'm going to fuck you in every room until you can't see straight," he swore in a lust-laced voice.

Jared chuckled and kissed back downward to his cock, suckling on the head for a moment before pulling off with a pop and stripping himself of his clothes. 

"Doesn't mean we still can't fuck. Just gotta be quick," he purred and then froze, his cuts forgotten until that moment. Fresh cuts scabbed over and purple-pink scars covered a good deal of his lower stomach some even stretching to below his jeans. "I... I was..." Jared trailed off, looking away, fearful of rejection.

Jensen's eyes were locked on Jared's scars, anger taking him first before he realized that it was his fault. 

"Baby boy..." He flipped them over and laid Jared back on the bed so he could take a good look at the scars and newer cuts. "I'm so sorry." He gently ghosted his fingertips over Jared's marked skin.

"No, please, it's not your fault," the younger murmured, placing a large hand over Jensen's. "I was in a bad place, it wasn't your fault, I swear." Jared knew there was a hint of a lie to that but it wasn't like Jensen made him hurt himself. "I'm just fucked up is all..."

Jensen gave the man a skeptical look. 

"You were in that place because of me," he reminded as if Jared would forget. "I shouldn't've left you alone like this..." he muttered.

"I'm a grown man, I should know how to take care of myself," Jared argued, sitting up slightly. "We should w-wait... I have more on my legs and it'll only disappoint you more," he said quietly, tracing his fingers over Jensen's creamy skin on his bicep then his pecs.

Jensen shook his head. 

"I'm not disappointed in you. I'm disappointed in myself for letting go of the best thing that's ever happened to me and letting him hurt himself." Jensen took Jared's hand and kissed the back of it. "But you're right. We should wait because I want to take my time with you."

Jared smiled and the tears welled up again.

"God, I'm such a pussy..." Jared huffed and got up to get Jensen's pants and underwear for him as well as his own shirt. The moment both put their clothing back on, Mark knocked at the trailor door before stepping in. 

"Sorry, I had to take that call. Wasn't as long as I thought it'd be," he laughed and eyed the two. "So, do you think Jensen could be the one for Dean?"

Jared looked at Jensen and grinned. 

"Yes."


	9. Chapter 9

Jensen causally walked along the red carpet, smiling for cameras and answering questions for reporters when asked. Jared was at his side the entire time, the author shy and awkward since that was his first movie premier. 

"Jared! Jensen! Where are your dates for the premier tonight? I would think two attractive men such as yourselves would have lovely ladies on your arms!" a female news reporter asked over the roar of the crowd.

Jensen looked at Jared, not sure if the author wanted to answer.

"Um..." Jared began, flushing bright. He looked to Jensen and he didn't know what to say. "We're still both on the market," he joked, trying his hardest not to pull his lip into his mouth to grind it bloody. "No one really knows me in Hollywood yet besides my coworkers," he explained, pushing a strand of loose hair behind his ear.

Jensen shook his head and laughed. 

"He's joking with you two. We actually did come with dates." At the admission of love interests, the reporters went wild, cameras flashing and microphones being pushed forward. 

"Oh my, where are the lucky ladies who are with you two tonight?" the reporter queried, eyes bright and eager to be the first to report about Jared Padalecki's and Jensen Ackles's new girls. 

Jensen smirked and wrapped his arm around Jared's waist. 

"We came together, actually." He winked at the cameras, throwing in a hint at the innuendo that slipped in there.

Jared began blushing furiously, opening and closing his mouth, unable to form sentences. Jensen just renounced his heterosexuality for Jared. 

"Jen..." he said, looking to the man for any signs that he was kidding or wanting Jared to pull away and call it off as a prank.

The female reporter couldn't help but laugh as she thought it was a joke. 

"Yes, many sources have said that you and Jared became as close as brothers during the movie. It's nice to see two friends breaking the idea that they need to bring dates," she said.

Jensen shook his head. 

"Oh, no, he's not my friend. Friends don't do this." The actor cupped Jared's face and pressed their lips together in a slow and sweet kiss that made several people cheer and cry at the same time.

Jared's eyes bugged out of his head before they slowly fluttered shut, lips moving gently along with Jensen's. Knowing Jensen revealed himself for Jared made his heart sing and do back flips and dance all at the same time. He pulled back before the kiss got too long and smiled, resting his forehead against the other's. 

"Thank you," he mumbled, lacing his fingers loosely with the actor's.

Jensen returned the man's smile and pulled away to look at the shocked reporters. 

"H-How long have you two been an item?" the reporter asked hesitantly.

Jensen kissed Jared's temple. 

"We've been together for almost a year," he confessed. When the reporters asked how they kept things a secret, Jensen rolled his eyes.

"Hello," he started, "we're actors!"

"We actually, um, we've been seeing each other for about a year and a half if you count Texas, even though that wasn't official," Jared mentioned, wrapping his arm around Jensen's back. "Jensen is perfect for me in every way possible. I'm... I'm really lucky to have him," he said all the while staring into the eyes of his lover. Some assistant walked up to him and tapped his shoulder so he could lean down and she spoke in his ear. "We gotta go inside, Jen," Jared said and thanked the assistant before grabbing Jensen's hand tight and walking down the red carpet with his boyfriend.

Jensen waved at all the cameras as he passed them, a smirk on his face because he knew this would probably be top news for weeks. Plenty of people wanted to see another kiss from the two men but all they got was hand holding and loving looks. 

"Thank you for giving me another shot," Jensen murmured into Jared's ear once they were seated comfortably in the theater.

"How could I not? I fell hopelessly in love with your ugly mug," Jared teased and kissed his cheek lovingly. They watched the awards, laughing sometimes at what their glorious host had to say. When the category of Best Director came on screen, Jared took Jensen's hand in his. They showed a clip from his movie and people cheered, as well as cheering for the other movies. Jared's eyes widened when his name was announced as the winner and he gasped before grinning and kissing Jensen deeply. Mark let Jared take the role of directing it, giving him advice throughout it.

"I couldn't've done this without you," he mumbled against the other's lips before getting up and going on stage. The crowd settled down and he cleared his throat. "Uh, hi. Wow..." he looked down at his award, "this is amazing. I never thought something like this could happen to me. I can't say I did it alone either. My partner, Jensen Ackles, helped me through this wonderful journey by being the best boyfriend and the best Dean I could've ever asked for. Thank you so much!" Jared finished his speech and made his way down the steps back to his seat, grinning wildly.

Jensen clapped as he waited for Jared to return and greeted him with a kiss on the cheek. 

"I knew you'd win. How does it feel living the star's life?" he whispered into his lover's ear.

Jensen couldn't get a response though because next they were calling for Best Actor and his face appeared on the board next to three other candidates. His hand found Jared's because if Jensen's name was called, it was going to give him the perfect opportunity to do something he was waiting to do for a while.

"And the winner for Best Actor is none other than Hollywood's hottest actor, Jensen Ackles!" 

Jensen looked to Jared and gave him a wink before getting up to accept his award. He was practically brimming with pride and excitement when he accepted the award. 

Jensen cleared his throat and went up to the podium to say the speech he had been dreaming of since he was informed that he was nominated for the award. 

"Ladies and gentlemen, it's good to see all of you here tonight. I want to thank a lot of people for this award, but mainly I want to thank the author of _Supernatural_ , my boyfriend, Jared Padalecki." He paused to let the screams and the cheers die down. "Thank you for being so supportive. I want all of you to know that this is real. There is no scandal, I'm not trying to get publicity by coming out with the hottest new author of the year. And to prove this isn't a scandal--" Jensen stopped to take out a black velvet box, doing so without breaking eye contact with Jared, which he put on the edge of the podium so both the cameras and the audience could see. "That's exactly what you think it is. I knew Jared before he was the author of Supernatural. I knew him when he was just a barista making really damn good apple pies for ungrateful customers. That was the Jared Padalecki I fell in love with, and it hasn't changed since he's a celebrity now. It's Jared that I want to give this ring to. This is real and I don't plan on hiding it anymore," Jensen ended his speech there, not tearing his eyes away from his lover.

Jared was happily enjoying Jensen's speech then his jaw dropped open, hand coming up to cover his mouth. Tears bristled in his eyes and he got up, almost running to the stage to embrace Jensen. 

"Yes, God, yes, Jensen," he whimpered, fingers curling in the black suit jacket. "I love you so much," the male cried, unaware of the cheers because he was so consumed with Jensen and the fact that he wanted to marry him.

Others around them congratulated them but all Jared could think about was Jensen. He kept himself as close as he could to the other man, uncaring of the rest of the show. 

\---------

When they stepped into the house, the ring placed snugly on Jared's ring finger, he pushed Jensen up against the closed door and kissed him passionately, needing the contact.

"Love you so, so much," he said against Jensen's lips, gripping him tightly.

Jensen hummed into the kiss and wrapped his arms around the younger male. 

"Love you too, Jay," he murmured into the kiss. 

Two sets of feet ran for the men: Harley's and their new dog Sadie's. They caused the kiss to break apart with excited jumps and barks of greeting. Any other time, Jensen would've been annoyed at being interrupted but right then, he was floating on a cloud of happiness that he hadn't felt since he made it big. His life was close to perfect now that he had Jared. Everything was falling into place.

Jared laughed and turned to kneel down, getting dog fur all over his suit and not giving a single shit. 

"Hey girl, hey boy. Guess who's gonna get married!" the man said excitedly, the dogs clueless but happy nonetheless. "I never thought my celebrity crush would have ask me to marry him one day. Only ever in the fan fictions I wro--" Jared stopped his sentence short, clearing his throat and blushing wildly while still petting the dogs.

Jensen smirked at the beginning of his fiancé's confession.

"Why don't we go celebrate in the bedroom, Jay?" Jensen leaned down and grabbed a handful of Jared's hair, yanking it back slightly so he had access to the man's neck. He spoke against the author's skin in a low and seductive purr. "And after I fuck you sideways, you can show me those stories, Jared Ackles."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and for those who were the around the beginning of this story, thank you for being so patient with me. 
> 
> I'd like to thank my friend in helping me write this and thank all of y'all for giving me feedback and compliments. xoxoxo


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